Im late!!!!

[ThatsSoFetch]

So - long story short. Im always pretty much 99% on time with my monthlies! Its always between a 27-29 day cycle. But normally pretty much spot on 28 days.

Its always the same thing - nightmare for the first 2 days, tails off for 2/3 days afterwards.

But this month - 3 days late. Im shattered, cant stop peeing and I keep feeling super nauseous. The first 2 here I had with the previous pregnancies, the latter I never had with either.

Done one of the really really cheap pregnancy tests and it came up negative - will also note I did this mid way through the day - today actually.

This is a definite TMI but there is a very very minor pinkish discharge - nothing else of note though - and reading up online this could be 'implantation bleeding'.

Ive been with OH just over a year, we have 2 DC's each so really, another is not something we have discussed or even something Im sure we would do.

So - my huge question is - what is the absolute latest that if I do a test, it comes out negative, that I can be definitely sure it is definitely negative. Is 3 days late enough to say it is definitely negative?

You're both idiots then. Do you want a baby?

He really isnt an idiot

No, that seems like a joint title between the two of you if you didn’t think the withdrawal method wouldn’t risk pregnancy. No one here can tell if you’re pregnant or what could be delaying your period. Do a test with fmu, if there’s no positive soon then it’s probably just a skipped or late period. It happens to even the most ‘regular’ women. If you’re not pregnant and don’t want to be, look into some actual contraception.

I tested a few days late and it was negative, nothing. I tested again 2 weeks later as my period still hadn't appeared and I got a vv faint line. When I went to the dating scan I was 2 weeks behind what I should have been going off periods.

So yes if you ovulate late you can still test negative weeks late.

Being a bloke he refuses to wear a condom.

How old is he 16 FFS.
Is he also going to refuse to get up on the night to a crying baby. If you are pregnant
If my dp "refused to wear a condom I'd be refusing bloody sex!!!!!

I've just read a bit more of the thread, you don't think you want more kids but are using the withdrawal method . Madness.

I think we just both thought the withdrawal method would be reliable enough

I honestly didn't think people were stupid enough to think that. You are a grown woman and that is your argument? I hope to god you aren't pregnant because you do not sound very responsible.

Christ on a bike, OP, where do I even begin with this?

We use the withdrawal method.

The "withdrawal method" is not a method. It is just not using contraception.

Being a bloke, he refuses to wear a condom.

At risk of stating the obvious, a condom is designed for one purpose: to be worn on a man's penis during sex to prevent pregnancy and the transmission of STIs.

If all blokes refused to wear condoms because they are blokes, condoms would not exist because there would be no market for them.

I think we just both thought the withdrawal method would be reliable enough despite the whole of human history proving it to be useless? Ok.

According to the FPA - 22 in 100 women who use the withdrawal method will conceive in a year.

Although people often think of withdrawal as a method of contraception, it’s an unreliable way to prevent pregnancy.

The way it’s typically used means around 22 out of 100 women relying on it will get pregnant in a year.

www.fpa.org.uk/use-reliable-contraception/withdrawal-method-is-not-reliable

Have you both been STI tested if you're not using condoms?

slashlover - we both have actually - and I was tested again not so long ago when I went for my smear as I had other symptoms so they did the broad spectrum swabs to pretty much test for everything. All clear.

I totally get everyone having a go at me about the withdrawal method - huge error of judgement on both our parts if it has indeed ended up resulting in a pregnancy. But I really dont need a huge amount of negativity right now if you can please understand.

ThatsSoFetch

You had sex and didn't use contraception. You are usually very regular now you are late. You have been feeling a bit under the weather. But the test came back negative.
If you still think you could be pregnant, you will have to either see a doctor, or do another test (properly, first thing in the morning).

We've used the withdrawal method successfully for years (and conceived every time we wanted to on the first month, so no fertility issues).

It's not necessarily a bad idea if you do it properly.

You sound like you could be pregnant to me. Test first thing tomorrow morning.

We've used the withdrawal method successfully for years - No, you've been lucky.

Jesus Christ, you are a grown woman and don't know that you can get pregnant before ejaculation. I despair.

Being a bloke, he refuses to wear a condom. (yes I know - sigh)

i know you dont want this to be about the condom refusing, but seriously....?

I'm not sure why you posted about the withdrawal method as most adults know it doesnt work?

(personally i would possibly leave this thread as you probably wont get the support you are asking for in AIBU)

Moving on to the actual question, this is what the NHS says, www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/pregnancy/how-accurate-are-home-pregnancy-tests/

Carrying out a test
When you become pregnant, your body produces the pregnancy hormone, human chorionic gonadotrophin (HCG). Home pregnancy tests detect HCG in your urine.

You can take most pregnancy tests from the first day of your missed period. Tests carried out earlier than this are not always accurate. For more information, see How soon can I do a pregnancy test?

Negative test results
If the test result is negative, you may not be pregnant. However, negative results are less reliable. For example, if you do a pregnancy test too early, you could be pregnant, but there may not be enough HCG in your body to give a positive test result.

Pregnancy tests vary in their sensitivity (how soon they can detect HCG and what level of HCG needs to be present). You can find information on the packaging about how sensitive your test is.

If you still think you're pregnant after a negative result, wait a few days and try again. Speak to your GP if you get a negative result after a second test but your period hasn't arrived.

Jesus Christ, you are a grown woman and don't know that you can get pregnant before ejaculation. I despair.

Yes I do.
And I also know that it is vanishingly unlikely.

Every single time my husband has ejaculated inside me without protection I've got pregnant.

Every other time he hasn't and I haven't.

We've been together ten years. It's not just 'luck'. No need to 'despair' or patronise me.

No condom = no sex
I have been using this 'method' for years. It is very effective. It hasn't failed yet

I don't understand the aibu?
Aibu thinking i could be pregnant using the withdrawal method? Yes you are.

There is a difference in choosing to use the withdrawal method with a husband of several years than in a short term relationship with a neanderthal who refuses to wear condoms so not really the kind of guy you want to hand your fertility over to, and when a pregnancy wouldn't be good news.

I really don’t need a huge amount of negativity right now

OP you do understand you’ve posted in AIBU, right? Neither yourself or your partner use contraception (sorry to be blunt, but you’re both stupid) you’ve got 2 DCs already so you both clearly realise that unprotected sex leads to Children.

How would you feel if you were pregnant? X

I didn't test positive until I was almost 7 weeks so until you get a period you may still be pregnant.

There's nothing you can do at the min, test again in the morning. And if it's not too late buy some condoms

@TwistedStitch Yes, that's true.

Oh and for @Nesssie who was in 'despair' at my apparent ignorance:

www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control/withdrawal-pull-out-method/what-are-the-disadvantages-of-withdrawal

Planned Parenthood basically say it fails if people either don't pull out before ejaculating, or suffer from premature ejaculation.

If you do it properly, it's about as effective as condoms.

www.netdoctor.co.uk/healthy-living/sex-life/a27944/does-pulling-out-work/

How old are you? There is always that first time our period does something unusual. The fact that your chances were low from the start and that you had a negative test is more indicative or just a change in periods. Could it be that you are hoping to be pregnant deep inside? Because that can mess you about enough to mess up your period.