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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I may well be BU regarding Neighbours parking.... what do you think?

68 replies

Blueberriesandbananas · 19/09/2018 11:47

I know the MN rules regarding parking is to put a diagram on, but I won't as I'll probably out myself!

I moved into my house over ten years ago, the house has off road parking as there's a dropped kerb outside. However, after changing my car eight years ago I could no longer park on the drive as every time I did the car would 'bang on the bottom' as the drive is quite steep. you'd have thought I'd have had the sense to think about this before I bought the car.
Anyway, it wasn't a problem to park on the road instead as there was mostly only my car and ndn's parked on a large stretch of road (where you could probably park seven or eight cars) and part of this includes a lay by.
Ndn has always parked in the lay by (he doesn't have a drive) and I parked just on the straight bit of road, but not directly across my dropped kerb as I preferred to be able to see my car easily. (Kerb nearer to the side of my house more out of view).
Parking like this was all ok, but inevitably over the past few years, other neighbours have bought cars/moved in and the lay by where my ndn parked has been 'taken over' by others who don't go out often, thereby not giving ndn as much opportunity to park there now. Because of this, ndn (or his wife who uses the car for work) started to park their car in the spot I've been using for years.
No problem at all (I could just move a bit further down if ndn was there first). Now though, ndn's son has moved back home with his car and ndn now also comes home in a works van.

Again no problem with this, but, I've noticed over a period of time that if I happen to park where I did for a number of years, ndn and his wife or son often park right up my arse and up to the bonnet leaving me to have to do about 27 manoeuvres to try and get out, and they do that even if there is plenty of room for them to park a little bit further down.
Although, if the lay by is free, ndn's are happy to park there and don't attempt to box me in.
I've started to feel as if they're trying to 'intimidate me' into parking directly outside my dropped kerb so that they are left to have the 'better' parking spots.
I've noticed that if I 'move along' and park across my kerb 'out of their way' they don't park within an inch of my car.
The past couple of weeks though, if either the ndn, his wife and son can't manage to park all three of their vehicles outside our houses, they have taken to parking directly across my dropped kerb, leaving me to park further down the road with my car being out of sight.
This has really pissed me off, especially as they have three vehicles between them, against my one!
Although, I'm prepared to be told I am BU expecting to at least be able to park against my own dropped kerb, as I don't use the drive way.
Mind you, I do use it to turn in and may need to leave access for skips I sometimes have delivered.

What do you think? am I being precious or are my ndn's being intimidating CF's?

OP posts:

Juells · 19/09/2018 13:02

Bump back and forth to get your car out of the space. Then deny all knowledge of the damage to their cars OK, I'm joking, but I'd be incandescent with rage if neighbours did that to me and I knew it was deliberate. Damage would be done.

Thelastredwinegum · 19/09/2018 13:08

Could you put planks of wood at the bottom of the drive so that you can get on more easily?

wowfudge · 19/09/2018 13:09

Oh for crying out loud - it's the public highway, park where you like as long as it's legal. If the neighbours are in the habit of parking right up to your car then leave more space at the other end. If you can't do that, bloody talk to them and ask them not to box you in. They probably think you are trying to make some kind of weird point by not palling on your own drive.

wowfudge · 19/09/2018 13:09

Parking not palling

Thelastredwinegum · 19/09/2018 13:09

www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&f=23&t=1179021

mariniere · 19/09/2018 13:13

Park where you like - I think they are pretty aggressive and unreasonable but it is unlikely to change their behaviour to be honest.
I love the suggestions above that you offer your drive up to your neighbours or shouldn’t worry about scraping the underside of your car because you can’t see it mumsnet really does excel itself sometimes.

KatieMarieJ · 19/09/2018 13:13

We had a drive like this once. The pavement went one way and the drive and house the other with a peak in between. Tried to get any longer car on it (Mondeo type) and they would bottom out. We had the drive redone to get rid of the hump. Should be fairly straight forward and saves any argument.

DeadBod · 19/09/2018 13:14

Why don't you ask your neighbours to move their car forward/back each and every time that you get blocked in they'll soon stop doing it.

cjb57 · 19/09/2018 13:21

Parking over a dropped kerb, even your own, is being unreasonable to wheelchair users and buggy pushers.

Any chance you could dig out the steep driveway a little and have a slope/steps from it to your front door? Might be a bit pricey at first but your insurance may go down slightly. In fact - have your would your insurers your car is NOT being parked in your driveway when at home? Perhaps unreasonably, it may not be insured at all if you haven't updated them.

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/09/2018 13:24

They’re sounding very pa but from their POV you have a drive and are taking space otherwise available to them. As the person with the ridiculous car and the driveway, I think your best bet is to park further away tbh. It’s not their fault you decided to buy a car, which is unsuitable for your property and I don’t think you should make it so.

If you don’t want to do this, yes, I agree with asking them to move every time. However, I fear this will lead to more anger and resentment. Personally if it is financially in your control to change cars, I would do this.

I wouldn’t let them park on my drive. No way. If you continued this agreement for an extended period, they would be able to legally claim the right to park on your property, which would devalue your house a lot more than cutting your losses and changing your car.

itbemay · 19/09/2018 13:25

We have three cars in family, mine DH and DD, no driveway, 2 white parking boxes outside our house (london), numerous down road on both sides and whilst two of us manage to park there most days if I can't it does piss me off but it is a public road so I get over it fairly quick.

My neighbour has a drive, if he didn't use the drive and parked on the road using a precious space i would be outraged... you have a drive, use it or park across it. YABVU, if I was your neighbour regardless of how many cars I have I would be pissed off too.

Also why do you need to see your car?!

ShalomJackie · 19/09/2018 13:47

Would you consider letting them park on your drive to free up a space? Maybe they'd be more considerate of you offered this.

nocoriander · 19/09/2018 13:54

No, absolutely don't offer them the use of your drive. If they're the type to deliberately block you in, they're not going to be reasonable about that if you get a more suitable car or the arrangement doesn't work out any other way.

Get your drive sorted out if you can, and when you change your car, make sure it's suitable.

KurriKurri · 19/09/2018 13:55

ve you explained to them why you don't use your drive way? Because if you haven' then from their point of view they are thinking 'why on earth does she park in the road, when she's got a perfectly good driveway', in their eyes you may be taking up road space that they need for thier various vehicles when you already have a built in off road parking space.

I'd go and tell them you can;t use your driveway and ask them if they could be careful not to box you in (I agree they are most likely doing it deliberately) then at least everyone knows where they stand and they might be a bit more considerate.

KurriKurri · 19/09/2018 13:56

first word in that is 'Have' - no idea why it got chopped off.

qwopler · 19/09/2018 14:06

It may not be possible for the drive to be 'fixed' to solve the problem. We have the same issue with our drive and can't use it. Our setup is that the road is flat, then a steep verge down to the pavement which is level with our drive. Nothing we do with our drive will change the fact that the verge between the road and the pavement is too steep for us to get down without scraping the car. We tried it when we first moved in and got stuck! The only way we could use our drive is if we buy a car which is higher off the ground. We just park along the dropped kerb instead. Pushchairs and wheelchairs aren't a consideration because it's too steep. A house a few doors down has a ramp down the verge for wheelchair access from the road to the pavement so that is safer to use. I don't understand why you can't park along the dropped kerb all of the time, op. Is there a reason you need to be able to see your car?

NoSleepTil2030 · 19/09/2018 14:09

YABU and selfish. My NDNs are like this too, they have a driveway they refuse to use but no-one else can park in front of, and it causes problems with parking for the whole street. If you insist on being able to see your car then you should tell your neighbours they can park in front of your drive. Otherwise you're just selfishly hogging loads of space.

Fresta · 19/09/2018 16:38

My neighbours have the attitude that because we have a drive we shouldn't be allowed to park on the street and that they have more right to than us. However, the drive is very narrow and difficult to reverse up and the front passenger has to get out of the car before the driver reverses up as its too narrow for both doors to open at once. Therefore, if we are just doing a few short in and out trips it's better to park on the road for us. We only have one car, the people opposite have 3.

Obviously, if they park outside my house I can't do anything about it as they they have every right to park there. But so do I. In fact, I take the attitude that I pay more council tax, I also pay for a parking permit the same as them, and I paid more for the house too because it has a drive. So if I want to park on the street for my own convenience then I bloody well will!

Original poster

Blueberriesandbananas · 19/09/2018 18:59

A pp said I'm taking up three spaces by parking on the road
You could argue that maybe I'm using one extra space by not parking against the dropped kerb, but if I could park on the drive then the kerb space wouldn't be available anyway for someone to park on as I'd be blocked in!
No way will I offer to let ndn's park on my drive, they would take the piss I'm sure, and besides, I'd be blocking them in if I parked against my dropped kerb.

OP posts:

PrivateDoor · 19/09/2018 19:06

They abvu for blocking you in,very aggressive behaviour! I would definitely try and have a word with them about that.

Witchend · 19/09/2018 19:08

How does the drive being steep means it hangs on the bottom?
I can't picture it unless it's like a hump backed bridge.
Surely the car is still half a wheel.off the ground whatever the angle of the drive?
I need a diagram if this too.

reallybadidea · 19/09/2018 19:13

I never understand why people want to be able to see their car from their window. I don't understand what it achieves tbh.

Original poster

Blueberriesandbananas · 19/09/2018 19:13

PrivateDoor
It's getting to the point where I probably will say something to them

Another poster asked if ndn's know why I can't park on the drive, yes they know exactly why I can't.

OP posts:

Original poster

Blueberriesandbananas · 19/09/2018 19:21

The car bangs underneath when I go either on or off my drive. It's because the initial incline (I think that's what its called) is too high.
It's not a gradual slope Iyswim.

I can't draw a diagram as it'll out me.

For what its worth, I don't sit and gaze adoringly at my car, I just think of other have three vehicles then surely it's more fair to park one of theirs further away if need be.

OP posts:

Winchester89 · 19/09/2018 19:23

@Blueberriesandbananas
Can't you just park over your drive tho?

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