To not want pics of new baby on Facebook?

[Woshambo]

I don't know if it's the hormones or if I'm genuinely worrying.

I have made my baby (Not born yet) his own private fb with only family members as friends. My thinking was everyone would see his pictures that we post at the same time, they can share pics with each other and he can see all the nice messages when he's older.

However, the OH family want to change their profile pics (already done it of my scan) and share stuff on their own public profiles when he's here.

I'm just worried about stories that you hear of people stealing pics, paedophiles stalking profiles etc. They'll post his nursery and where he will be and when.

There's also the fact that he may turn out like me, I've not had a photo taken for 7 years as I hate them. I don't put personal information or anything on.

AIBU to ask that they just stick to his private one for now?

Yanbu. There's no need to have your child as their profile picture and it's not like you're doing it and telling them not to.
I think you can report the photos to Facebook but not sure how good Facebook are at taking them down.

While I think some of your reasoning is a bit over the top, no YANBU to want to keep pics of your child off public social media. Your baby, your rules. Don't share pics with them if you can't trust them.

I wouldn't worry about it myself, speaking as someone who rarely uses social media, I have nothing against it and am not worried about big bad bogeymen

Even though you don't like it - try to take a few photos of you and your baby. It's nice for the memories later.

And completely different thing but I get the feeling they are slightly controlling, keep that in mind when they want to pass him around and be strong asking for him back. Also if you and your OH have different last names, get yours in there - double barrel or something don't just leave it out.

I would predict you will be far too busy irl to bother much with a dc's fb page!!

I swear I think u must be psychic NoProbLlama78 ! From trying to decorate my house to MIL demanding to being in for my birth.

My pov is that I was able to grow up without my every move posted on social media, and I think my children deserve the same. Once a picture is online it's public property afaik. I consider my children to be entitled to their own privacy online and not every waking moment in public view.

Yanbu to say you don't want your child's picture posted online. Tell them no, and if they do it anyway don't share photos with them.

Thank u for replying all, I'm not sure if I feel as strongly as I do or if I'm being THAT person as I feel like my heads up my bum and I'm panicking over things but my mind is coming back to this a lot.

You’ve made a FB page for a baby that isn’t here yet? That’s weird and surely children aren’t supposed to have accounts?
I don’t put my kids on FB. Don’t share stuff you’re not willing for friends and family to share.

Best way to keep your baby’s photo off Facebook is not to put it on there in the first place. Once you do, you have no control over what others do with it.

Yanbu. It’s up to you to not have you baby on social media. I have absolutely zero of DS1 on social media and neither does DP or any family, they know I’m very strict on this. Everyone gets constantly sent photos of him through WhatsApp and I get them all developed for photo albums.

Nothing against people who do have photos of DC on there tho, each to their own! At least tell them to not have the photos on public!

I have no issue with social media, but that's because i post pictures of my baby myself, and am happy for other people too.

However, other people having a picture of my baby as their profile picture would be odd, unless the picture includes the person as well. Scan pictures is very odd imo

Woshambo I think I'm more like Derren Brown - using your scan picture as their profile picture is pretty nuts and your comment about posting which nursery he will be at - argh!!! Your OH needs to back you up x

Wolfiefan yes it's so both sides of the family get information at the same time and so they can satisfy their need to post pics etc in a private platform. We both have huge families who are very social media orientated.

Lazypuppy I find it odd too, it's what got me thinking about the social media aspect as it was a photo sent privately

What you could do to document your child's life for them is to create an email address and send scanned copies of drawings they do/cards they make/pics of models made, email letters from you on significant birthdays/events etc and send it all to the email address.

That way you can create an electronic timeline for them but it's not on social media.

If you add DP's family to your child's page, they can download/'save as' the pics and then use them elsewhere.

I can’t help but feel you are being a bit hypocritical- you have decided to set up a Facebook page for you child to post pictures without their permission, but you don’t want your family to post pics of the same child without your permission. Personally in your position I’d just set up a family WhatsApp group or something. Agree with the pp who said once you post the pics they are online forever. Your child may not thank you for that!

DI think it's weird having a fb page for an unbeknownst child.
That's the strangest thing I've heard today.

@Woshambo normally if someone has a scan picture as their profile picture people will assume they are pregnant.

Unfortunately, i think by having a fb page created, you are kind of saying you are ok with social media photos. It's not how it should be if you don't want them posted elsewhere, but will be harder to explain.

@NoProbLlama78 just learned how to tag lol. I'm thinking the same I just wasn't sure if I was being OTT or it was normally now a days.

Going to have another talk to him about it tonight as well as a frank talk about his mum lol she is NOT watching me give birth.

Could you start a family WhatsApp group for sharing photos and then just have a total ban on putting any baby photos on Facebook. Lines are less blurred that way.

It's really weird when the parents have the scan picture as a profile pic, never mind the extended family!

Children shouldn’t have FB accounts. And certainly not unborn children. That’s weird.
You’re sending out very mixed messages. Either you don’t want pictures shared or you don’t mind.

Delete the account.

All sounds a bit dramatic OP. Talk of paedophile? You could always ask family not to post any identifying information like where he goes to nursery/school etc? And that everyone has their page set to private?

YANBU. My brother and SIL have made the same request for their new baby and I wouldn’t dream of going against their wishes. It’s totally your decision.

@woshambo tell the midwife!! They won't let her in if she turns up and might be best not to say when you're in labour too.
You're pregnant you don't need this stress. I get the private fb page - it's to contain it. Make sure the settings are tight so posts can't be shared and maybe put something soppy on there that it's a private page for his very best friends.