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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not pay for friend to get her phone fixed after I smashed it?

507 replies

katie3347 · 16/09/2018 11:17

Friday night me and my friend went out for drinks.
We were stood at the bar and I turned around quick and knocked my friends phone out of her hand,it hit the floor and smashed the screen.
It's still working but the screen is totally cracked.

She was a bit upset saying she didn't have insurance and couldn't afford to get it fixed.
I can't afford it either and shouldn't she have had insurance on such a expensive phone?
Anyway I haven't mentioned it since ..aibu to just not mention it again?
I know she probably expected me to pay to get it fixed but it was a accident and she was the one who let go once I hit her arm.

OP posts:
lizzielizard · 16/09/2018 15:56

And the moral of this story is - put your phone away on a night out and actually talk to the people around you.

jq28 · 16/09/2018 15:59

You should definitely offer to pay for it!

OlennasWimple · 16/09/2018 16:01

I'm genuinely astonished by the number of people who say that they wouldn't at least offer to pay.

If you break something, you are responsible for making it right again. Sometimes you can get help from someone else, like an insurance company. Sometimes the owner of the broken item will kindly take care of it themselves. But there's no get out clause in decent behaviour that says that an accident means that you don't have to pay

QuarterMileAtATime · 16/09/2018 16:03

YABU and should offer to pay or at least go halves

MyNewBearTotoro · 16/09/2018 16:36

All the people saying ‘if you can afford drinks you can afford £40’ - a round of 4 drinks only costs about £10 at my local Wetherspoons. It’s the same price on a Friday night to a Tuesday. I’m up north would find it hard to spend £40 on a night out unless I was going to expensive cocktail bars or buying every single round myself.

Barbie222 · 16/09/2018 16:40

Yes, you should pay, because you knocked her hand so you need to take responsibility for the accident. You were at fault.

MyNewBearTotoro · 16/09/2018 16:41

Also, I agree that if you break something, accident or not, you pay for it.

I guess the reason I don’t think the OP should pay for it is I don’t think they broke it. They bumped into their friend but it was the friend who dropped it - she should have had a proper hold on it, a bump shouldn’t be enough to make you drop the phone if you’re being careful and if you get your phone out in a busy place where you know people are drinking you should be extra-careful andhold it properly, or wait until you’re seated at a table to get it out.

I also don’t think dropping a phone from hand-height should be enough to break it if it’s adequsteky protected with a case and screen protector - I’ve dropped my phone several times without it breaking because it’s well protected.

In this case I think it was the friends fault that her phone was smashed because she failed to protect it with a case and failed to hold it properly, dropping it on the floor. I really don’t think the OP did anything wrong here or is to blame for the friend dropping it.

SerenDippitty · 16/09/2018 16:41

She dropped it. She obviously wasn’t holding onto it properly and if all you did was turn around and bump into her then clearly she was standing too close to you.

Erm, drinks on a Friday night. Pubs/bars tend to be noisy and crowded. If you stand too far away from people you will not be able to hear what they are saying. Thus defeating the object of going out for drinks.

OP should pay.

MyNewBearTotoro · 16/09/2018 16:44

Well then put your phone away. If you want to talk to people then why do you need to be on your phone at the same time? Put it in a pocket or a bag and it won’t get damaged, or if you need to make a text or phone call move away from the crowded area and sit down whilst you take your phone out.

PermanentlyFrizzyHairBall · 16/09/2018 16:49

I think it depends who was the most negligent. How hard did you nudge her when you whipped around. If it was a normal knock and she just wasn't holding it properly then it's her fault. If you were a bit drunk and whipped around with too much force then it was your fault and you should pay.

civicxx · 16/09/2018 16:52

@katie3347

You broke her phone. Why would you not offer to fix it?

'She let go' ... you whacked her arm

I think she's daft for not insuring it if she knows she can't afford to fix it. I have a stupid iPhone also where if you breathe on the screen it cracks but I have tempered glass cover on it & I can afford to buy a new phone if mine broke (hence the no insurance)

I think your being a crappy friend for not offering to pay for or at least towards the phone. How would you feel had it been the other way round?

If people can't afford to maintain things they own they shouldn't buy them in the first place.

MaisyPops · 16/09/2018 16:53

LyndorCake
I know what you mean. Cases aren't perfect (i dropped my last phone on a gravel drive and it landed awkwardly so got a small chip in it) but there's no denying that a phone in a case is much less likely to break than one that isn't. I still think had I got a better screen protector then mine probably wouldnt have chipped.

Erm, drinks on a Friday night. Pubs/bars tend to be noisy and crowded. If you stand too far away from people you will not be able to hear what they are saying. Thus defeating the object of going out for drinks.
I agree. So common sense says if you've got a very expensive phone and can't afford the repair costs should it get broken then you don't have it unprotected and you don't get it out in a crowded place where you might get knocked.

As I say, for a friend i would chip something in but the phone being damaged is entirely down to the friend not taking any responsibility for her own possessions.

PollyFlinderz · 16/09/2018 16:56

Of course you should pay for it. Not that I believe this actually happened.

Poppyinagreenfield · 16/09/2018 17:03

I think you should pay £40 and forego some nights out. Friendship is worth far more.

itdoesntmatterwhereimfrom · 16/09/2018 17:03

Definitely at least offer half. Plus a screen protector.

flumposie · 16/09/2018 17:03

Definitely offer something. Yabu.

snowgal · 16/09/2018 17:21

I think you should do as you would like to be done to you. If you would be upset if your friend knocked your phone and broke it then I think you at the very least offer to pay half, if you'd be okay with having to pay up for your own phone breaking then your conscious is clear. I'd personally offer to pay, I'd feel awfully guilty (to be fair I was semi responsible for one of my friends breaking her nose on a night out, the guilt was terrible!)

Autumn2018 · 16/09/2018 17:24

Would your friend have to pay excess, had she been insured?

catlady3 · 16/09/2018 17:26

Very interesting to read some of the responses and that people are saying your friend should have insurance for this. Just to offer some perspective, where I'm from, everyone has insurance that covers them in case they damage someone else's property (or causes them to be injured). So my gut feeling is to say that this is absolutely your responsibility and you should pay 100% of the repair cost. If you drive your car into someone's house, by accident (this happened recently in my neighbourhood, it's well classy here), do you think you shouldn't pay to fix their house? Of course you should.

happymummy12345 · 16/09/2018 17:29

I think the fairest thing to do would be for you both to pay half.
You knocked her, she dropped the phone. Sort of both responsible.
I couldn't not offer something at the very least.

pintsizedblondie · 16/09/2018 17:33

I think you should pay. Your actions caused her to drop her phone, regardless of whether it was an accident or not. Put yourself in her position, - if she had done the same to you would you expect her to fix your phone? If you don't offer to pay, I don't think you will be friends for much longer.

Sciurus83 · 16/09/2018 17:36

Such a split! I am.on the side of you take your expensive phone to a bar, you should have insurance. It was an accident. I probably offer but honestly would expect that to be turned down. Certainly if it was me I would tell a friend not to worry about it, because I have decent insurance for exactly this reason. Accidents happen, phones are fragile, if you cant affird the insurance you should have a cheaper phone. Interested whether the people saying you should pay would pursue a stranger who bumped into them in a bar to pay for a dropped phone. I certainly wouldn't and I think you'd be a bit of a dick if you did tbh

SchadenfreudePersonified · 16/09/2018 17:39

I've been in a lot of charity shops with ornaments on shelves and table displays etc that have noticed saying that if you break the display items, you pay for it. I don't know about "proper" shops.

Agree KeeVee -- and Ive seen many "proper" shops with "You break it, you've bought it" signs - often in poetry form ("Lovely to look at, delightful to hold; but if you should break it, we consider it sold".)

Fefe69 · 16/09/2018 17:41

You broke it, you pay. How utterly selfish. Insurance isn’t the issue here. It’s how greedy you are over £80 split down the middle at £40.

crrrzy · 16/09/2018 17:47

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