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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dogs

141 replies

apresski · 15/09/2018 22:53

We live down a country lane very popular with dog walkers (despite dog walking paths by river just adjacent). Our gates are open on to the road (not the river) and we have had repeated dogs run into our garden. I am from a dog family, my DH isn't (allergic). My daughter is also allergic but seems to be growing out of it, but as a result of allergies at an earlier age is petrified of dogs come running at her or are overly bouncy/friendly etc. Now.... AIBU to think of you walk your dogs up and down a lane or in public you should be able to control them going in to other people's gardens or property? DH and I had an argument about it today but actually daughter was terrified by three dogs running around chasing her and was screaming.....! Thanks all

OP posts:
Aprilshowersnowastorm · 15/09/2018 23:00

Close the gates?

PositivelyPERF · 15/09/2018 23:01

Close the gates, like wot she said! ☝️😁

Boopboopb · 15/09/2018 23:03

Shut the fucking gates.

Menolly · 15/09/2018 23:03

YANBU. my dog is a bit of an arse and likes to sniff gates, so he might start to go into your garden before I realise gates are open and call him back but he'd never get more than a couple of feet because I don't let him far away from me on roads because that is stupid and irresponsible. No dog should ever be left to run into someones garden, let alone left long enough to chase your daughter round and scare her

SD1978 · 15/09/2018 23:03

I'm afraid another close the gate. No you shouldn't have to. People should have control of their dog, but if it's an open areas dogs explore- they may not (owner) realise the gate is open and get the dog to avoid it. The simple solution is you protect your daughter and not have an open gate.

GlassSuppers · 15/09/2018 23:04

You have gates.

Close them.

Problem solved. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Original poster
apresski · 15/09/2018 23:11

If we had gates we opened closed every day then I'd simply do that, we don't they're old and left open for postman, delivery and us coming in and out. Why should we have to close gates...? If you have dogs who don't respond or run off then Shouldn't they be on leads? If I am in the house and DD is in the garden why should I have to worry about dogs running in?

OP posts:
LyndorCake · 15/09/2018 23:15

Because dogs are animals. They can never be truly, 100% trained. They can be very, very well behaved, but if they decide to not obey, then they won't obey.

Plus your argument is like whinging about unwanted guests when you leave your door open, or flies when you leave your windows open....

FelixTitling · 15/09/2018 23:29

YANBU but everyone will tell you that you are.

My son is severely dog phobic - you have my complete sympathies. This is one of the hardest phobias to resolve and the selfish attitudes of many dog owners makes it so much harder to tackle.

My hard hat is on.

Maelstrop · 15/09/2018 23:33

YANBU, but the only answer is to close the gates. Replace them and electrify so they open automatically for vehicles, maybe? You shouldn’t have to, but dogs are friendly, they’re going to run to say hello.

LongtimeLurker29 · 15/09/2018 23:33

Another one for shut the gates

SilverHairedCat · 15/09/2018 23:38

I think the reality of it is that no matter whether you are right or wrong (and YANBU) you aren't going to get every dog owner to sort out their behaviour and will have this issue for a long time to come.

Therefore, you're going to have to take defensive action of some sort. Whether that means putting in more practical gates; segregating the entrance so marauding dogs can't get to your daughter, or coming up with another safety plan, only you know the layout and what will work for you.

12sillypenguins · 15/09/2018 23:39

YANBU for not wanting them running around your garden. I always watch mine closely to make sure they aren't going where they shouldn't (certainly better controlled than my toddler 🤦‍♀️) but the simplest solution is for you to shut the gates. Yes the owners shouldn't let them run into your garden, but you can't really do anything about that, you can however shut the gate and solve the issue.

Glumglowworm · 15/09/2018 23:43

You can’t control other people and their dogs. You can control shutting your gates. It’s the obvious solution to your problem.

Yes people should have their dogs under control though. But since plenty don’t, you have to solve the problem by shutting the gates.

smallchanceofrain · 15/09/2018 23:47

Oh good, a dog thread. We haven't had one of those for nearly a week.
Pros: Dogs are ace. It's not the dog's fault, it's the owners.
Antis: Dogs are the disease spreading spawn of Satan and will rip your child's face off.
Everyone else: Meh.

Shut the gates. Problem solved.

ChinUpShouldersBack · 15/09/2018 23:49

YANBU to think dog owners should make sure their dogs don't run onto private property.
YABU to think that every dog owner will do this.
You have 2 options in real life. Shut the gates or keep being annoyed by furry intruders.

butterflysugarbaby · 15/09/2018 23:53

@apresski

YANBU to be pissed off, and you are right of course, that people should be able to control their dogs. But dogs get excited and jumpy when they have big free runs. We were at a big beach the other week, (MILES long!) and there were DOZENS of dogs running round like crazy, and they loved it.

Although I agree you are in the right, you will have to close your gates. Sorry, but despite your protestations, I can't believe that you need to keep them open all the time for 'deliveries' and the postman, and I think you are being a bit stubborn and bloody-minded.

Sometimes we just have to give a bit.

An elderly lady near us had SIX carers a day for a whole year before she died, (staying half an hour to 40 minutes each time.) Half the time they parked awkwardly, making it hard for us to get out of our drive in the direction where it's a quick exit out of our road.

So we had to turn the other way and do an extra half a mile at least 3 times a week. Did we complain? No, because shit happens, and we just adjusted our ways when we had to....

Tartsamazeballs · 15/09/2018 23:58

Cancel the cheque!

Sorry... Close the gate!

FelixTitling · 16/09/2018 00:06

I would love to have a 2 foot spider (or other 2 foot thing that people are scared of) and let it into peoples gardens, run around madly on the beach with a load of other 2 foot spiders and I'd let it jump up at people making loud spider noises. I'd just stand there saying "stop screaming, it's only trying to say hello"

Of course closing the gate wouldn't be much use cos the spider would just crawl over it.

aperolspritzplease · 16/09/2018 00:07

You've got gates for a reason!

butterflysugarbaby · 16/09/2018 00:10

@FelixTitling

U OK hun? headtilt Sad

SeaToSki · 16/09/2018 00:16

Put up a sign at your gates saying ‘warning rodent extermination in progress. Chemicals are fatal if ingested by dogs’

FelixTitling · 16/09/2018 00:18

Excellent idea SeaToSky

Treasure114 · 16/09/2018 00:22

YANBU. I despise dog owners whose dogs are out-of-control like that. Your poor daughter!!

Rigamorph · 16/09/2018 00:24

Surely that would only work if the dogs could read?!

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