To teach my child to read before school?

[MagnaDoodle]

Mixed feedback on this one from various friends and family so thought I’d ask!
My DD1 is 3.5 and is winter born so we have the option of school next year or the following year (we are in Scotland). So far we are thinking we will send her next year at 4.5 (and her nursery is absolutely supporting this decision) but it’s early days and my mind is still open.

She loves her books. We read three books a night. Just Julia Donaldson and similar. She seems to have a good understanding of them and what’s going on etc. There are certain, favourite books that she knows pretty much by heart.

I think she wants to read. She is interested in letters and will ask me to read signs etc to her when we are out and about. She’s learning the alphabet at nursery and we have a couple of little games that we play at home to help her to get to know the letters. She’s very enthusiastic about this.

She’s also really keen to write her name which we have practised a few times but with limited success. She gets fed up with trying quite quickly and I don’t push her. She does however recognise her name and can spell it out with fridge magnets correctly.

Nursery have said that in the year before school they focus more on the social aspect of getting her ready for it. Which is absolutely the way it should be. They do the alphabet and some number work but not much. It’s not their priority.

My mum, teacher friends etc all tell me not to teach her to read before school. She will be bored for a year etc etc. This makes sense to me. But at the same time I feel like I should encourage her interest.

Any words of advice? Please don’t mistake me for a weird, pushy helicopter parent. I’m not. I love that she loves books but it doesn’t put me up not down whether she learns to read before school. It’s just that she’s keen.

If she is ready and interested then don't hide it from her. A good teacher will find her things to do to keep her from being bored.

I would also add that I don’t have the first clue how to teach a child to read and I don’t want to make a mess of it I can read up on that

I wouldn’t teach her to read but would maybe do alphabet with her if she is interested etc. We had half the class start reception being able to read, but the problem is that they don’t often have the comprehension to back it up. What I mean is, they could read the words, but didn’t understand anything around the text. Reading is more than just reeling off the words, it’s understanding and divesting then too.
They had also all been taught in various ways so not the way we teach them as a school which makes things more difficult. As a reception teacher I would honestly say, that although they can read the words, they don’t understand - it’s only when they comprehend that they really read.

No words of advice but following with interest. My dd (just 4, September bday) won't start school until next September, but she is keen to try to read words in books and can recognise a fair chunk of the alphabet.
We never push it, but she asks to do it and I am worried we may teach her the 'wrong' way...

Should probably add that doing phonetic alphabet with her would be very helpful and just read to her - lots.

My son learned to read before he started school and he wasn't bored. He learned by asking me what signs meant, recognising words like Asda and boots. He was really interested in car names and number plates and somehow just put it all together from that himself. He read me out all the options on a menu once and that was when I realised he could read for himself. Neither of his brothers learned early, in fact one still struggled aged 8. He was just interested.
I think if your dd is genuinely keen to learn she will learn in a similar way. You don't need to actually sit down and teach her. Encourage her in games and in reading what she sees.

My mum and dad taught me to read before I started school (I’m a summer baby so was 4 when I started), I’ve always absolutely loved reading. The only “problem” I remember is that when teachers were sending home words we needed to learn, but I already knew them so I had to have harder ones provided...I don’t remember ever feeling it was a problem.

Keep it fun and based on alphabet recognition now. I recall using foam alphabet letters in the bath- once she knew her letters really well I started with cvc words. You’re right there does seem to be a method to the way they teach kids how to read so best discuss with nursery.

She won't be bored if she can already read when she starts school.

If she wants to learn, teach her. If not, don't. Don't worry about how you teach her. There's no right or wrong way at this stage. She won't have to 'unlearn' anything when she gets to school. They'll just teach her the method they use and it will be additional to anything she already knows.

And don't worry if it doesn't go very far. Don't feel that you've invested the effort and must complete the job. The best education for a child is to learn to love learning.

My son could read by 3. His school just differentiate accordingly to be honest.

Let her carry on how she is eg memorising words in books, trying to read signs etc but don't bother teaching her to read. My own mother who is a teacher advised me against it as they have a very specific way of teaching children the sounds and will have their own reading scheme. I just don't think it's worth it. If your child has an affinity for reading, she'll whizz through the colour bands anyway so it's not going to hold her back. She won't get bored, reading is s small part of all the things they learn in R.

My DD6 was reading early and was getting phonics books to take home in nursery etc. She did complain at times that Reception and Year 1 were boring. But she has had great enjoyment from reading books to herself the last few years and she doesn't have any difficulties at school or issues struggling to keep up and her attention span and communication skills have made her an easier child to parent, so I wouldn't not encourage your DD. Each kid is different, let them florish at what they have a natural flair for. My DS on the otherhand is nearly 3 and can only pick out the letter M...for McDonalds My PFB standards did not carry over He doesn't seem so keen on writing and reading so I'll let him go at his pace.

Just to add I could read before I started school but I don't think it's made any difference to dd, now yr 1 and reading really well, that she couldn't when she started R.

If she likes to write, but finds it physically challenging, try pavement chalks or paintbrush dipped in water on the pavement or patio. Much bigger, much easier to control, less demand on fine motor skills.

You could do some phonics with her and if she’s ready you could start to blend words. She’ll be fine at school. Both my DC could read fluently before Reception and didn’t have any problems. Obviously don’t push it if she gets bored! But if she’s enjoying herself it’s fine.

Just read together and enjoy books and teach her a love of stories and storytelling. Honestly, once they get to school it’s like the phonics nazis come out and there’s so much pressure (and we are a really low key household when it comes to things like this). If she’s bright, she’ll pick it up quickly in school so there’s no reason to start now. But there’s no reason not to answer her questions about what words me and teach her to write her name. I’d leave it at that though. Use the time to play outside and get muddy and all that stuff she’ll miss when she starts school.

Ds2 could read before school, as he loved books and wanted to do whatever his big brother did. He was absolutely fine and just as engaged as his older and younger brothers who could do some phonics only. They all have areas to develop and if she can read, then maybe it will give her time and confidence to focus on socialising, gross motor or maths, for example.
I'd agree with others to let her lead and not push it, she may lose interest and that's ok too. Also if you can find out from other parents(or if you are at the school nursery perhaps?) it would be helpful if you use the same system they do. Our school uses Jolly Phonics and it was helpful to use the same kits, approach etc so it wasn't confusing when he started at school. We had a lot of fun with reading, and phonics makes it very straightforward, once you've understood the basics. Have fun!

I could read fluently when I started school at almost five and I still love reading, I remember going to older classrooms to chose my books and was given different spellings but only had positive impact on me.

My daughter showed an interest around 6 months ago (she's 4.5 and has just started in reception) so we supported her interest in learning the phonics and recognising and writing letters. She can't read but I think she's feeling motivated and ready to learn and is loving doing her school reading every night!

I'd personally encourage it if she's showing an interest, her reading books from school will reflect her individual ability. Teach your monster to read is a great resource/app.

I was reading well before school - Mum used to tell of a train journey when people asked if I had a growth problem because they could not believe that such a young child could be reading out all the station signs and adverts! 😂

I don't recall it having any problems for me but we lived abroad and I was bumped up a year when I changed to UK education. I come from two families of huge bookworms though so it was seen as normal.

Our son was already starting to read simple words at that age (cat, mat, bat etc). His school asked that he was able to read and wrote his name before starting. He is still only reading simple words really slowly but it hasn't been an issue with the school at all. A familiarity with letters, letter sounds etc was an expectation going into reception. If she is interested then I don't see how it would benefit her to prevent her from learning.

look up "Mr Thorne does phonics" on youtube - some great videos for learning about phonics and gradually moving on to putting sounds together and making words :)

She sounds like my daughter, who has just started school nursery at nearly 4.

She is obsessed with letters, spots them all over the place, asks about them etc. I go with the flow, encourage her when she wants to 'write', can write her name and about 50% of the other letters without help.

We do what she wants, we use an app on the ipad called reading eggs, all very game based, picking things that start with the letter given etc.

I spoke to a colleague who is a primary teacher who advised getting her to retell me the story from books she knows, use books without words to get her to tell me the story. All very low level stuff, but not pushing it on her at all. Quite often I will ask her to tell me the story in her book whilst I am brushing her hair before bed for example.

We have weeks she wants to do lots, asking me to spell out words etc, other weeks we get no interest at all so we don't do it. Same as any other play she does.

If she's not ready she won't pick it up. If she's ready now she'll zoom off in a year's time. And be bored in school anyway if it's the kind of school where being ahead leaves you bored.

DS: wasn't reading at all before he started but was frustrated at the slow pace from about 3 weeks in till he got his hands on a complete phonics chart and songbirds levels 1-6. Then remained frustrated at school books but could at least read his own at home.

DD: was reading fluently before nursery. Reception teacher heard her reading own choice chapter books from the library at least occasionally. Yr 1 teacher insisted whole top group read level 4-5-6, but that would have been equally annoying to DS by that stage.

DD wouldn't regret reading early for a second. It was like her own little super-power as a preschooler. As many stories as you want, without having to wait for mum or dad?

Main thing to be in tune with school is to teach using phonics. You'll find lots of info if you Google. When you say they're doing alphabet - hopefully using letter sounds not letter names? Otherwise has potential to confuse rather than help some children.

I think if a child wants to learn they should be supported in this. My four year old brought home flash cards and 2.5 year old DD wanted to look at them. She was reading by 2 1/2.

My dd could read before she started. She was at a Montessori preschool which saw she was ready so they got her started. My older dc was already at school so we knew the phonics so could do it properly at home,

It was fine - she flew ahead at school and the teacher adjusted accordingly.