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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not pick Mum up?

63 replies

advicepleasex · 14/09/2018 19:36

Mum just rang us to see if OH can pick her up from a funeral reception apparently no one can give her a lift.

I've just had a c-section so can't drive and I have ds and dd I don't want to be left alone with them because I'm still in pain.

He can't be bothered and wants to relax plus he just took her to a job interview Wednesday and picked her up.

We're not mean are we?

OP posts:
Topseyt · 14/09/2018 20:07

She just turned up at your house!! Call a taxi for her. Cheeky mare.

Gersemi · 14/09/2018 20:07

How did she get to the funeral? Why can't she get back the same way?

itshappenedagain · 14/09/2018 20:18

Don't let your DH take her home. Make excuses, you need to set a president now, or it will continue. She's not old or frail, and more do WHO TURNS UP UNANNOUNCED ON A FRIDAY NIGHT!ShockConfused

NerrSnerr · 14/09/2018 20:20

It's a shame your husband has already had a couple of glasses of wine isn't it?

BewareOfDragons · 14/09/2018 20:23

You need to start setting firmer boundaries with your mum, starting tonight: she gets a taxi home.

Original poster
advicepleasex · 14/09/2018 20:24

Yup she's just turned up hinting for a lift OH has said no

OP posts:
JessicaJonesJacket · 14/09/2018 20:26

She's been to a funeral and your OH can't be bothered giving her a lift. And you can't be left on your own for 10 mins. . .MN is always an eye-opener especially on Friday nights.

Betsy86 · 14/09/2018 20:26

Flipin eck how did she get to your house....

Original poster
advicepleasex · 14/09/2018 20:30

@JessicaJonesJacket that's not the point though we give her lifts all the time. We're relaxed for the evening now it's not fair on my OH he's constantly going out of his way taking her places and waiting for her. She could even of told us earlier to pick her up would of been different then.

Someone from the funeral dropped her in town and she's walked up to ours.

OP posts:
XiCi · 14/09/2018 20:31

FFS she's your mum and been to a funeral. She lives 6 miles away. Would it really kill your DH to drive her home?

Aria2015 · 14/09/2018 20:33

I certainly owe my mum a few lifts! She used to pick me up from town in her dressing gown so I'd do it (or get my dh to). It does depend on the kind of relationship you have with your mum though.

redcaryellowcar · 14/09/2018 20:36

I can only assume there is a lot you aren't saying here. I'd happily drop my mum home in similar circumstances (or my dh would be happy to!?)

lazyarse123 · 14/09/2018 20:38

Can't blame him for being fed up if he's always doing it. Tell her to get a taxi and give you more notice next time.

Bluelady · 14/09/2018 20:40

It would never occur to me or my husband not to. Families aren't what they were.

Singlenotsingle · 14/09/2018 20:40

I would if it was a one-off, but not if she makes a habit of it. It's not as though it's just 2 streets away, is it?

mycatplotsdeath · 14/09/2018 20:46

I would order her a cab

stressedtiredbuthappy · 14/09/2018 21:03

Couldn't possibly imagine not helping my mother out with s lift at any time.
But it obviously depends on your relationship doesn't it?
If I'd just had a csection ,and I've been there,my mother was right by my side.

If they'd been a funeral it must've been a major one and I'd have sent my dp to collect her, I'd have managed.

agnurse · 14/09/2018 21:05

Does she not realize that they have these things called TAXIS and RIDE-SHARE SERVICES that she could call to ask someone to pick her up?

You can even look these things up in something called the PHONE BOOK or you can take your cell phone and look them up ONLINE.

No, you don't owe it to her to pick her up. She's an adult. She can make her own arrangements.

Pamdoo · 14/09/2018 21:27

I can only assume there is a lot you aren't saying here. I'd happily drop my mum home in similar circumstances (or my dh would be happy to!?)

I'm thinking the exact same thing. I could be way off but I think there's more to this. Some stuff sounds a lot like a different thread

Redglitter · 14/09/2018 21:29

Sounds like she's unemployed

No it really doesn't. Not if we were reading the same first post Hmm

Marriedwithchildren5 · 14/09/2018 21:31

Sorry I think you're a bit mean. Dh could pop her home if it means getting her out the house.

BarbarianMum · 14/09/2018 21:33

Id be happy to drop my mum off in similar circumstances- as a one off. Not if she regularly thought me a convenient alternative to the public bus or a taxi though. The woman is 63 not 83 and Im presuming it wasnt the funeral of her nearest and dearest or the OP would have said.

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 14/09/2018 21:36

Are you posters serious? They've just welcomed a new baby, her and DH he's probably run down and still trying to catch up with himself also. If they want a night in to relax then they can.

The Mum knew she was going to a funeral and should have organised herself a way of getting there and back.

sweethope · 15/09/2018 00:32

The mothers being a pain. I wouldn't dream of doing this on my daughters. In an emergency yes, but the mother knew in advance she'd need a lift and thought she'd use you as a taxi service. Why the hell should your Dh have to do this, just say no.

victoriaspongecake · 15/09/2018 00:37

Yes yabu .

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