To think you don't summon adults like a lost pet?

[Onceihadaname]

So, I've got the back door open and the washing out the back. I am in the living room on the couch getting some work done & looking after my dc...
Neighbour's kid must have booted over the ball because he has started hollering my name towards my back door. He has done it a couple of times in the past and tbh I have ignored it every time because I thought it was really rude and I didn't want to make him think I would come running if he called. Eventually I will check on the laundry and will chuck the ball over then.
Except this time the mum has joined him hollering my name! Not asking if I was about, not an hello, just repeatedly shouting out "Ethel"*.

Now I happen to know that while she has 2 under 5 to look after that she also has her parents round. Both parents can drive and have no mobility issues and both say hello to me when they see me so there is absolutely no way that 1 adult of the 3 functioning ones available couldn't spare the 30secs to pop down the drive and knock on my front door.

Is this a thing now???? It has absolutely wound me up and I am choosing to ignore them or I'll end up in a row. Please tell me this is not normal and AIBU to think if they can't be bothered to come round they can flipping well wait

Diagrams added as I know how essential they are!

*not actually my name!

I am glad to see that I am not alone in being bugged anyway!

I think I'd go with... Going out, and saying to kid . Hi, I know you didn't know, so I'm giving it back this time, but when I'm in, I'm working, so in future I'll just throw it back next time I'm out here, OK? Cheerio!

He'd be more careful if he knew he might have to go a day without his ball too?

We would never have used neighbour's first name as kids. Everyone was 'Mr' or 'Mrs' or 'aunty' or 'uncle'.

My neighbour just messages me on fb if stuff goes over asking me to chuck it back when I have a sec, they only poke their head over the fence if we’re in the garden.

It's not the being called to, it's the being called like a dog. In effect issued an instruction to attend rather than politely asked.

A couple of our neighbors walk into the garden and call out hello, is anyone home, blue are you there? Or similar if the back door is open. That's totally fine.

Just calling as you'd call a dog is for genuine emergency only. Same with my own kids if they yell "Mummy!" and expect me to come running theyd better need medical attention, or saving from imminent danger, or have spotted a fire...

honeydragon we do similar with the other side and it has never been an issue.
Apparently shouty side are less aware of boundaries or manners
I think an 8ft fence might be in order

"" Everyone was 'Mr' or 'Mrs' or 'aunty' or 'uncle'.""

That was when neighbours were neighbourly and certainly wouldn't have knocked on someone's door, when you could speak over the wall/hedge.

Knocking on the door, became the "thing now" along with play dates etc, not the other way round.

We would just go in the neighbour's gardens and get the balls back. It was only a very few old ones that would bang on the window at us.

It would take the same effort if they knocked on the door, for you and more of a disturbance. I don't understand the issue, tbh.

Thanks blueskies - that is how i feel.
I also understand that a kid can make mistakes in talking to non family, but it feels weird that mum has taught this behaviour.
P.s. don't know why my last post has a random dragon and not a hmmm face!

I'm very PA so I'd pretend to be deep in conversation on my phone (work, dontcha know) and wander out to back door where they can see me, talking animatedly, not looking in their direction, and close the door. But then, PA

There’s simply no need for them to shout until you comply is there? I get why your irate completely.

It wouldn't bother me in the least and I'd just chuck the ball back without even thinking about it.
I'd probably shout my neighbour's name in a similar situation.

But they are not trying to talk to me over the wall because I am not there!
If they shouted "hello", or "are you around" i would mind a lot less, but shouting nothing but my name repeatedly at my house makes me feel like they think that I am just there to be disturbed at their convenience...

Nope. YANBU.

We were always told you would have to knock on the door if we wanted it back. If you didn't want to do that, you just had to wait andnolay with something else.

It worked as a deterrent for kicking it over as no-one liked knocking on the door to ask for it back 😂

I'd worry more about the huge blue rabbit sat in front of your couch

They are using your name. If they were shouting hello or whatever you might not register they are saying it to you.

Yeah this would naff me right off. I have no issue throwing balls back etc but the kids on either side either wait for me to do so or come and knock. They wouldn’t dream of just bellowing my name over and over!

Why a random picture?

@MorrisZapp

Ever since a particular episode of Wife Swap ca 2002, DP summons me by shouting 'Carol' in a Yorkshire accent, getting louder each time.

It's hilarious I tell you.

We do this too! We still find it hilarious, glad we're not alone

I can be pretty vague at times but I am not so thick that if they shouted "hello ethel, are you there?" before shouting my name that I wouldn't twig that they were shouting me!
Also, if they had tried to do that then I would have been out in under a few mins saying "here is your ball, no problem, but please don't shout at my back door again if you don't mind"

What's this now, Open all Hours?

Wtaf.

So it's because they're being factual and blunt you're annoyed?

@MorrisZapp, get him to watch this. Then he might start calling you 'Harold' in an American midwest accent. I'm not sure whether you'd consider that an improvement on Yorkshire Carol or not ...

I'm very PA

^^

What does PA stand for?

Accepted practice round us is to say something like 'Oh dear, the ball is over the fence. Well, it will have to stay there now until Spudlet sees it'. Then I hoof it back when I'm outside next. When ds is big enough to send his ball the other way, I will do the same. We certainly wouldn't stand yelling over a fence, how rude!

If I ever chucked my ball over the fence (accidentally!) I was made to go and knock on the door and ask politely if I could please have it back. If I'd just started yelling, mum would have been apopletic

PA means passive aggressive.