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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not expect my DB to shout my age out in a pub

45 replies

heartnothead · 10/09/2018 13:02

or not so DB.

organised a drinks do and my DB came. He was chatting to a group of my friends/colleagues (he didn't know some of them) and suddenly i heard him shout out my age. I remonstrated with him there and then but he pulled the old heartnothead is so sensitive/its only banter card. Said in a goady way!

Alright my friends know of course but I am bit guarded at work (work with alot of much younger people) not going to lie about it but not going to offer it up anyway. In my usual circle of colleagues and friends its not something we discuss much anyway.

He has got a history of being goady and we are very different people. Don't think I will bother inviting him to anything again

OP posts:
PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 10/09/2018 13:03

Why are you so guarded about your age?

TeeBee · 10/09/2018 13:04

I don't really understand why shouting out your age is goady. That's how old you are. Are you ashamed of your age for any reason? I do feel this is more to do with how you feel about yourself than about what he did. I wouldn't give two shiny shits if everyone in the world knew my age...that is exactly how old I am.

Pieceofpurplesky · 10/09/2018 13:04

Are you 17 and should not be drinking?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/09/2018 13:05

Was he winding you up because he knows you're funny about people knowing your age?

YouAlwaysTry · 10/09/2018 13:05

Are you 46 but look 60?

Duckherding · 10/09/2018 13:05

I work with someone who has to know everyone's age just is quite odd.

DB was looking to get a rise out of you and he did, don't invite him again

Original poster
heartnothead · 10/09/2018 13:06

I am in my 50s. Lots of crap at work and so don't want to advertise it.

Maybe its me then!

OP posts:
ineedabagformyhippo · 10/09/2018 13:06

Why does it matter? You are your age, what's the problem?

Original poster
heartnothead · 10/09/2018 13:07

Look alot younger or so I am told!

Think he's just a wind up merchant

OP posts:
NotTakenUsername · 10/09/2018 13:07

He sounds like a twat that never grew up and pulling pigtails has evolved only as far as sharing personal information with your colleagues... all in the name of top bantz.

What a knob.

PavlovianLunge · 10/09/2018 13:07

He was wrong to do something that he knew would bother you, but you’ve given him the ammunition to do it.

It’s just numbers, try not to let it be a big thing. Every age has its benefits - I find that not giving a fuck has got easier with age.

Original poster
heartnothead · 10/09/2018 13:08

yes duckherding agreed it is odd. My family seem quite fixated on age and what is age appropriate

OP posts:
chasinggarlic · 10/09/2018 13:08

Fuck me some people just make problems out of nothing.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 10/09/2018 13:09

I know someone who lied to her child about how old she was. She took 14 years off her real age. I thought it was a bit of a joke until I took a birthday card round with 50 on it and she hid it because then her dc would know the truth!

Crazy thing is she would have been about 15 years old when she'd given birth if she was really 12 years younger.

Amanduh · 10/09/2018 13:11

How weird being bothered about saying your age

MrsStrowman · 10/09/2018 13:11

That's how old you are why be ashamed? If you look younger that's a nice thing to hear isn't it? My dad loves it, he's often told he can't be 65, you look far too young... he is but admittedly looks about fifty. I don't get the issue

RestingButchFace · 10/09/2018 13:14

I am in my 50s. Lots of crap at work and so don't want to advertise it.
Is the crap age related? I find it hard to understand people being bothered about their age but each to their own. I am the oldest Mum of my daughters friends at the school gates by at least 10 years and I don't try and hide my age I embrace it.

Notquiteagandt · 10/09/2018 13:17

Unless you are 17 and worried about getting served. Surely this is a non issue.

Does anyone care about others ages? Or even pay it much attention.

Seems mountain out of a molehill.

Monday55 · 10/09/2018 13:21

Do you feel depressed about ageing ?

Age is a non issue

BitOutOfPractice · 10/09/2018 13:32

While I agree that age should be a non-issue, we all know that ageism is alive and well in many organisations, especially in "young" industries eg social media etc. So I can understand OP's reticence at advertising it.

However OP, I expect your colleagues do have a pretty good idea of your age anyway

Original poster
heartnothead · 10/09/2018 13:33

Not worried about ageing per se - in fact can see how its possible to have a great life when older.

However at work there have been so many reorganisations/restructurings resulting in quite a toxic atmosphere and I don' t fully trust people there (apart from a few).

I would always be a bit guarded and discreet if I were at a function full of my db's friends/colleagues I didn't know.

There's many things I could wind him up about but its not in my nature!

OP posts:
Poloshot · 10/09/2018 13:34

Not sure of the issue

Jaxhog · 10/09/2018 13:35

While I agree that age should be a non-issue, we all know that ageism is alive and well in many organisations

I work in IT, and ageism is rife (along with sexism etc.)

inTheBoredroom · 10/09/2018 13:35

This reply has been deleted

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BitOutOfPractice · 10/09/2018 13:36

I think the lesson to be learned here OP is not to invite DB to things with work colleagues!

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