to be annoyed what the school has done?

[Tistheseason17]

My DD5 has come back from school today and her book bag, which had a discrete label on the back with her name/class on it, now has her name written in full in big black marker pen across the top of it.

No consultation or contact from the school. They just defaced our personal property without consideration for child safeguarding or respect for personal property.

The school has a strict policy on social media posting of photos of children but they are showing everyone as we walk to school her full name easily visible across the top of the bag.

I am fully prepared to be flamed! That is the point of AIBU so I will acknowledge if everyone thinks I am over reacting!

Sounds like a bad idea to me and I would be complaining.

I guess some people can scoff at any kind of safeguarding worry but I’d feel it’s a concern and I’d rather not have my sons name displayed everywhere he walks. It’s unnecessary and does feel unsafe.

YANBU that's ridiculous

That's really crap. I had three kids through primary and nobody ever had a problem finding their own bookbag.
There are many ways of identifying the bags. Kids added stickers and key rings.
The school managed fine without large names on the outside.

You wanted to sell your child’s secondhand book bag to someone? Don’t people donate these, not sell them?

Also whoever it was who suggested defacing the school’s library books for revenge is a dick.

At the next parents-teachers meeting you should grab teacher's bag and write her name in black marker across the front of it. Just in case in gets mixed up with yours.

YANBU. It IS a safeguarding issue. I still don't understand why parents buy clothes/ hairbands etc with their dcs names emblazoned over it and that's just the first name but that's for another thread. I'd put money on it that the teacher/assistant has done it in annoyance at not being able to find yr dcs name easily. Ironically the dcs can ususally identify it themselves if they have a certain keyring or cartoon sticker on it. I worked in a school for a while where one teacher would pick up the bags read out the names and practically throw them at the children!

Ive been an infant teacher for 38 years. It is totally unacceptable for a teacher to write on anything that doesnt belong to school. If I wanted to write a name on a clothes label I always asked the parent at the doir if they minded me writing the name in.
Let the head know you are not happy about it, he/she may not know it has been done.

Door

OP Another teacher who thinks YANBU. Several reasons why it should not have been done. You had already put the name on the bag. Key rings are big help when identical bags are kept in a crate in the classroom and collected at home time. Perhaps I shouldn't mention that the maverick who use a superhero backpack as his book bag ensures that it is easily identified!
Years ago it used to be ok to write a name on the label inside a coat or sweatshirt - after at least a week of reminders to get it done at home. That made it so much easier to get all the garments left around in the playground to the owner rather than have a lost property mountain.

I would be angry as well and wouldn't want it on my dc's bag. My dc's infant school used to use key chains too for the dc to id their own bags, with small bits of paper in the front name bit for the name - as others have said this worked well for them. Name was on the inside too so if the name fell out then you could still id the bag and ask the child or parent to ensure a new bit of paper with the name on was put back in.

If you can't get it off, then get a really thick sharpie and use it to draw a neat black box around the name and colour it in - so your dd's bag will have a black stripe on it rather than her name. Then tell them what you have done when you take her in tomorrow and point out that you do not want them to write on her bag again, for the reasons outlined here. Then follow up with an email to the teacher, cc'd to the head and the secretary, to inform them that you were shocked and disappointed by their decision to deface your dd's bag, and to display her name against all safeguarding guidelines. As such you have removed this name, and you want to ensure that it is not rewritten on the bag elsewhere - particularly as the bag is already labelled with your dd's name.

I would also see what other parents thought - and if they were also against it, say what you had done to counteract it. You might start a trend and then there will be a class full of bags with black stripes instead of names - if lots of parents do this, it will show them that lots of people do not like having their child's name on display.

I am the complete opposite of precious snowflake about pretty much everything (save manners and hygiene), but this is my one exception. I’d be so, so disappointed and worried that a person in loco parentis thought this would be okay.

I live in a country where personalized school bags are A Thing, from age 3. It’s a trend that took off in bijou country suburbs where children are driven everywhere and everything is personalized. Ours is an inner city school (somewhere like Victoria in London), most kids get to school by subway, and it’s 100% a safety issue to have a visible name on a book bag belonging to a child who takes the same route to school every morning, with the same friends and caregivers, chattering loudly about their lives and whatnot. It’s absolutely idiotic and so obviously, too.

I’d cross the name out or sew a badge over it, and put a fluffy keychain on it (mine DD has 7 of them on her already unique bag 🙄), and write to the Head, copying the teacher, telling them why you’ve done this. I’d challenge them to refute your argument and go further to suggest this not be don’t to any other class in future. I’d also let other parents know what is done and why (they can make their own minds up whether to follow suit).

For a teacher, I’d be pretty goddam concerned. It’s jist common sense.

rosablue I wonder if you live where I do!

Tenbob out of curiosity, do you work in a school?

Is there a specific reason why you don't want your child's name to be visible on the book bag? Or is it merely an annoyance?

My gut tells me YABU and complaining for the sake of it. But as someone who has actually received threats against my family, I am very cautious about advertising where my children go regularly without me etc. So I understand why you are annoyed.

Seems excessive from the school. Our school book bags all have a small corner at the back bottom for name and class. Have had one wrong bag come home in 5 yrs. They can easily spot the tag as all in the same place

At the next parents-teachers meeting you should grab teacher's bag and write her name in black marker across the front of it. Just in case in gets mixed up with yours.

What a mature way to deal with an issue.

YANBU. Disrespectful of the school and definitely impacts on privacy, as well as making it impossible to hand the bag down to another child.

My DC's school did this nearly 20 years ago. Name in v large black lettters across front flap on book bag. One of the mums was a senior police officer. The practice ceased very quietly after she intervened and drew its inappropriateness to the head.

Is there a specific reason why you don't want your child's name to be visible on the book bag? Or is it merely an annoyance?

We live abroad. My daughter has to wear a name tag at school, but they are made so they can be turned around to cover the name while walking to and from school. It's definitely considered a safety issue.

For my youngest, she started pre-school at 3. There were a few incidences of the bags getting mixed up, so I drew a picture on the fabric of the bag. No problems since them.

Interested to hear what the school says about this. They really didn't think it through, did they?

Maybe your precious moppet keeps losing it and the adults at school are fed up helping her find it again. The safeguarding issue is nonsense too as 5 year olds don't walk home by themselves,

@SuburbanRhonda

Please RTFT - I said I wanted to donate it to the school as I do with all of their old school uniforms. But if I'd had a younger child I would have wanted to reuse.

@Fatted
I work in a public facing job and don't want to advertise my DC's full name (which identifies me!) and address when I walk her to and from school. I am sure there was positive intent - it just had a secondary outcome that most people on this thread agree with.

I'll let you know the outcome.

Personally I would go to school and reiterate that it is known that a childs name should not be visible on any schoolbags as it makes them an easy target for strange people as it does put children at risk.

Just buy a new schoolbag and send the school the bill for it, if they question you about it, tell them straight that you do not like the fact that they are eager to do something so dangerous and would like to know who gave them the right without consulting you as a parent.

Having a child's first name on it is a safeguarding issue! A stranger can walk up to your child and will know their name. Easy to convince a child to go with them if they show familiarity!
Raise it with the school. Could they have nit done initials?

I see the usual intentional thread derailers have showed up now.

It's up to the OP if she wanted to hand the reading folder down, donate it to the school, donate it to these "we send school uniform to children in Africa" organisations, sell it, raffle it, take it for a stag weekend in Butlins or paint it fucking purple (or paint it purple and send it for a stag weekend in Butlins). Doesn't need them to justify it because someone's decided they've found a hole in things to needle away at for five pages and derail things completely. The point is that now that option has been taken away from her.

(Ours will be lucky if they last a second year in school use to be honest - but I know other schools sell theirs with a bit more of a robust construction than the supplier our school seems to use for theirs)

Oh hello,little 'tisthe, don't you remember me? Your mum is running late and asked me to pick you up ..it is more convincing when the person knows the child's name