To ask what is/was/should have been on your pre-DC bucket list?

[HumbleCrumble]

Sort of light-hearted...

DH and I aren’t quite ready to start TTC yet, but the first signs of broodiness are starting to creep in. We’ll probably want to start trying in a year or so. The main thing that’s making us hesitate is the “life as we know it will be over” fear, so I think it might be a good idea to make a list of things we’d like to do before we try for DC.

Un-child-friendly holidays are the obvious one but am I missing anything else? Is there something that you’ve found difficult to do with DC that you wish you’d done before?

This post is making me a bit sad.

Honestly, just do as much of everything that you love but don’t expect not to miss it when the baby is here. Apart from travelling, I did the big trips I needed to do before we had DD and honestly believe holidaying with a baby is same shit different toilet.

I am quite desperate to hold hands and cuddle into my husband’s chest though. I would give about a million pounds to be able to do that.

I don’t have the sneezing/trampolining issue after two natural births so it’s not a given, except immediately after. I’ve still worn bikinis, even with stretch marks on my hips, but it’s harder to keep fit and eat well due to lack of time and energy. I was a bit younger when we had ours due to it being unplanned but I was so glad I’d traveled a fair bit, just not as much as I’d planned and not enough time with DH - the Thailand honeymoon was scrapped and walking to Machu Picchu now a distant dream, especially as pregnancy resulted in a permanent bad back. I rarely ate in expensive restaurants but tend to go with a friend now and feel justified as I can’t spend money on other stuff like travel.

The other thing is that having one child can make some things easier than two, such as people may be more willing to babysit so you can go out and it’s easier to take turns to nip to the gym or go out with friends/weekends away etc. So enjoy that bit too. I watched a lot of box sets while breastfeeding number one too. And lots of activities are only possible with one, baby swim etc.

I’m hoping we will benefit from missing out by having kids a bit younger than most people I know, by being able to enjoy these things again once the kids are older. And enjoy traveling with them once old enough to appreciate it. It’s just a bloody long time to wait.

I am quite desperate to hold hands and cuddle into my husband’s chest though.

Why can’t you?

Apparently once you have kids you can't ever go to the toilet by yourself again. I say "apparently" because this isn't something I experienced. But you might want to savour going to the loo regardless :)

Travel is the main one, really. Once you have kids, holidays aren't really holidays anymore until they get to an age when they aren't just awkward baggage and that period doesn't last that long before they become awkward teens and would rather stay at home on the xbox.

Going out together in the evenings is the one thing that became limited. However, we'd make a point of having a nice meal and bottle of wine on a Saturday night and 18 years later we still doing that most of the time.

We both found that we didn't miss child friendly holidays etc, as we just wanted to go away as a family and share our child's first experience of things. You can still go off and do things with friends new experiences or hobbies, but split the time fairly. Time does go quick and you soon realise you free to do everything you haven't done.

@IronQuill

For reasons of my own doing: we co-sleep so I lie on my side curled around the baby. My hips absolutely kill! She went in her cot for twenty minutes once and we had a cuddle quickly but then got nervous and spent the rest of the time watching her breathing 😳 first time parents and all that...

Don't buy loads of clothes and boots now because you might change foot size and body shape in pregnancy (like I did) and if you do get back to as you are now you want current things, not stuff you've been storing in a box for five years unworn.

Thanks God nonjeneregretterien I thought you were saying in your post that your husband had died.

Thanks God you clarified, I mean.

Some rubbish nights out. I am an older mum and had a lot of nights out before I became a mum. So many that some were a bit rubbish and I'd wish I could click my heels to get home rather than join the taxi queue!

When I am let down by babysitters and feel a bit sad, I remember those rubbish nights out and I'm glad to be at home!