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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be annoyed they sold our own dress back to us?

52 replies

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 16:29

NC'ed as this will out me to the school group I just complained to!

Just bought a nearly new dress for DD from school uniform shop. Went to label it and found it was already labelled... DD. They sold us our own dress! AIBU to be annoyed that they don't check lost property for names and try and reunite with the owners before flogging it? Or is it our fault for not having tried harder to get it back? (DD has ADHD and loses 2-3 items a term, we're not great at keeping track)

OP posts:

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 17:02

Also I don't know if this makes a difference or not [dons hard hat in case it's irrelevant to raise it] but it's an independent school so they are hardly strapped for cash.
of course arguably if we can send DD there then neither are we! wow, now I am telling myself YABU

OP posts:

PhilomenaButterfly · 04/09/2018 17:04

Oh, okay, another, mine have only ever come home in PE kit from an after school sports club. DD has lost tights after PE once, but never a dress, skirt or shirt!

handmademitlove · 04/09/2018 17:05

I spend a whole day each term going through lost property at the dc's school, returning anything with a name in to the correct child. I'm sure the school would be more than happy for people to volunteer to do this job!

SoyDora · 04/09/2018 17:06

£10 for a second hand school dress?! How much are they new?!

GreenTulips · 04/09/2018 17:06

I would never worry about asking a teacher to double check

Most teachers would ignore you to forget, as you know they have 30 kids to educate.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 04/09/2018 17:09

Most teachers would ignore you to forget, as you know they have 30 kids to educate.

I know, I am a teacher. I genuinely wouldn't mind checking especially for a child with additional needs which might lead them to misplacing items. I would see it as part of my pastoral care to that child. This would be even more true if I worked in an Indie school.

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 17:10

soydora - a lot! Think it was £30 to £40.
greentulips tbf in DD's case it's only 10 or 12 kids...

OP posts:

Stormzyandme · 04/09/2018 17:11

£10 for a second hand dress

DD wears school shorts from Morrisons. £2 in the sale

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 17:16

Stormzy I know! Our other DC is at normal school - their whole outfitting was less than DD's second hand top up shop.

So, what's the verdict? Do I complain or suck it up?

OP posts:

Leonard1 · 04/09/2018 17:23

If it was labelled with a name it should have been returned to the child not sold. Ask for a refund.

Walkingdeadfangirl · 04/09/2018 17:31

Ah a private school, that explains why they have the time and space to run a uniform shop. When you bought it you knew it was second hand, could you have checked for a label before paying?

I think if you can afford private school you should suck up the £10, at least it saves you the time of sewing a new name label on.

ineedaholidaynow · 04/09/2018 17:40

DS's Primary School always used to have a second hand uniform sale at the end of the year, which consisted of donated items and lost property. Parents were given a couple of weeks notice to trawl through lost property to check for any items that belonged to their child and then any left over items were included in the sale.

Would it be possible that the lady in the shop did not know whether the dress had been donated or came from lost property?

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 17:42

Would it be possible that the lady in the shop did not know whether the dress had been donated or came from lost property?
Probably!

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RomanyRoots · 04/09/2018 17:45

I would tell them and suggest they keep lost property separate from donated clothes so the same doesn't happen again.
it can't be too difficult to have 2 boxes in different places, labelled lost and donated.
I don't think it's fair to ask the pta person selling the clothes to know all the kids at the school and check each garment before selling it.

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 04/09/2018 17:58

It's not a PTA person or volunteer, it's an employee who runs the uniform shop. Same might apply but I thought I should clarify!
2 boxes sounds like a fair request.

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amy85 · 04/09/2018 18:27

It drives me insane the ds' school go on about us labelling everything, which I do, but then never check for names and just hung everything into lost property...and I'm talking about things that are visably labelled like a drinks bottle!
On the junior site they don't allow parents into the school so cannot check lost property ourselves...and my son can't spot his jumper in an empty room so there's no point asking him! I do ask of course but know it's helpless. At the end of last year day was reunited with 2 water bottles, a hat, a coat, and a snack box...all clearly labelled but had just been tossed into lost property

bookmum08 · 04/09/2018 18:40

If lost property was left forever until someone claims it the front office would look like a branch of Primark by the end of the year. Un claimed uniform stuff is sold, non uniform (hats etc) to charity shop or bin of filthy. Can't keep it forever and a PTA volunteer is unlikely to know if that name on the label is a current pupil or something outgrown or whatever.

PorkFlute · 04/09/2018 19:04

Yabu? I can’t understand why you wouldn’t check the lost property before buying from items left in the lost property?
Lesson learned for next time I guess.

twoshedsjackson · 04/09/2018 19:30

At my old school, we used to put out everything in lost property at the end of term on tables in the lobby, each form would be taken to look at it, parents were invited in to have a rummage at the end of the school day, and still we had heaps of stuff left over.
The bit that baffled (worried) me most was the underpants; I know little boys can be casual in their approach to sartorial matters, but how do you go home without your undercrackers and not notice?

Original poster

anotherdamnname · 06/09/2018 22:03

Development! It wasn't left in lost property. Another mum told me she (v kindly) went through lost property at the end of term and reunited named things with owners. So it found it to the shop through another route. Even more annoying

Twosheds DD loses everything, including pants on occasion!

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MissVanjie · 06/09/2018 22:08

I wouldn’t tell then in a complaining way, i would say ‘hahaha guess what?’ and do it that way, and then they’d probably offer the money back and, depending on what they use the funds for vs how badly i needed a tenner, i’d either accept or decline

Marriedwithchildren5 · 06/09/2018 22:21

I'd suck it up. It's more a funny story/learning curve really.

DieAntword · 06/09/2018 22:24

I’m with @PhilomenaButterfly on this one...

SD1978 · 06/09/2018 22:28

I'm slightly 50/50 about this. Who's job should it be to check all the lost property, see if it's named, then reunite it with the child in question? How often should they do it? If there is a box, and you know your child has lost something, surely it's your own responsibility to check? Other places (, swimming pools, gyms) don't make an effort to give you back your belongings if you leave them labeled- it's your things so your responsibility. Maybe if it's annoyed you, you could offer to go in fortnightly and do this for your daughter and others? Or try to organise a group of mums willing to go through everything regularly and reunite it?

policeandthieves · 06/09/2018 22:43

How do you lose a dress at school?
DS lost 2 pairs of shoes in one day (trainers and regular school shoes) He came home in Matron's plimsoles. To this day I have no idea how he managed it

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