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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour asking me to turn off outside security lights

196 replies

DLL1 · 03/09/2018 14:33

New neighbours have moved in next door to me and asked that I turn my security lights off at the night time. This is because they are (supposedly) shining into their landing and they sleep with the bedroom doors open and don't have a blind so it is going through into the bedroom.

They haven't said they will get a blind or curtain or shut their bedroom doors but want me to turn my lights off instead.

We have nothing but trees behind us so it's very dark without them on.

We have had the lights for 1 year and the family who have just moved out of that house never complained about the lights.

I turned them off last night when they asked but don't want to keep doing so as I paid a lot of money for them and like the garden to be lit up at night.

Am I being unreasonable if I refuse to turn them off during the night?

OP posts:
allthgoodusernamesaretaken · 04/09/2018 10:14

We were told by the police that all security lights do is give intruders enough light so that they can see what they are doing and are so less likely to make noise

Good point !

MrsExpo · 04/09/2018 10:45

YUBU ... there's no need for them to be on all night. I used to have neighbours who did this and it was infuriating - I was aware of them being on even through heavily lined curtains, so your NDNs getting blinds etc might not solve the issue. With my neighbours, it was actually worse when they put them on movement sensor though, as the local cats etc used to activate them and it was like living next to lighthouse some nights!!!. I the end we compromised by them getting lower wattage bulbs and angling them down so they shone more at the ground rather than straight at my bedroom window. Still no great though.

makingmammaries · 04/09/2018 10:46

YABU. I have a neighbour whose light shines into my garden. I paid a lot of money for my garden and like to go out there at night without getting dazzled.

FaFoutis · 04/09/2018 14:45

*Has anyone even bothered to read the OP's updates, let alone RTFT?

She's said she's turning them off.*

Well done to the OP but I don't think that is a reason to stop the YABU chorus. If other light wankers (pardon me OP) read this thread it might help us all.

Lweji · 04/09/2018 14:50

This:

Fuck me, what a massive waste of electricity. Not to mention light pollution.

and

get a motion sensor if you are really worried.

fieryginger · 04/09/2018 14:54

Can you not change the angle? I had issues with my neighbours wind chime - they slept at the front of the house, we slept at the back and it drove us potty.

Iscreamforbenandjerrys · 04/09/2018 15:01

She said she would turn them off pages ago! Read the thread!

Notasunnybunny · 05/09/2018 08:09

You have nothing but trees behind you so you think it’s would be better for burglars if you light the way for them? I’m not sure what you think you are achieving but lighting your garden at night other than costing your self in electricity and contributing to the light pollution that causes such environmental harm. I agree with others that the previous neighbours probably were counting the days to get away from you.
I’m lucky to live in a designated dark sky’s area and external lighting is strictly limited. Burglars just wouldn’t be able to see anything, it’s next to impossible to see your hand in front of your face without a torch, I can see the milk man pottering along from several houses away just from the light from his torch.

FaFoutis · 05/09/2018 10:47

I didn't know about designated dark areas. I'm off to look them up then get on rightmove.

MeyMary · 05/09/2018 10:50

I didn't know about designated dark areas. I'm off to look them up then get on rightmove.

Yes, Yes. I had the same thought! Blush

I really need to look up whether these exist in Germany. Or at least book our next UK holiday accordingly (if that is possible...)

Abra1de · 05/09/2018 10:51

I’m thinking of asking s neighbour to turn down his very bright outside light which completely dazzles us when we park our car in our narrow and winding drive.

Pinkyyy · 05/09/2018 10:51

I'm sorry to disagree with most but YANBU. They are choosing not to close the door or buy blinds. You need to feel safe and secure in your own home and if these lights make you feel that way then you have every right to have them. I would not turn them off

AllDayBreakfast · 05/09/2018 10:53

Could you not get them on a timer? Seems a bit unfair to be keeping them up with your lights while you snore away.

AllDayBreakfast · 05/09/2018 10:54

Even blinds won't keep out a bright light.

didyouseetheflaresinthesky · 05/09/2018 10:55

Why should they fork out for blackout blinds because their neighbours want to light their garden up like Wembley stadium all night ? YABVVU.

Needmoresleep · 05/09/2018 10:56

Plus heavy blinds and closed internal doors will restrict air flow on a hot sticky night. Why should OP dictate how her neighbour lives.

Pinkyyy · 05/09/2018 10:56

I highty doubt you've got the equivalent to Wembley stadium lighting up your road. You are under no obligation to turn them off and 'light pollution' is one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard of

FaFoutis · 05/09/2018 11:03

My road is worse than wembly stadium. As you walk up the road, on the footpath (and these are houses with big front gardens), the security lights all come on in your face like a series of nuclear explosions. You have to walk in the middle of the road to avoid a migraine.
It really should be illegal.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 05/09/2018 11:41

People need to read the thread - the OP has already said that she will turn off the lights at night - and this has been reiterated by other posters too.

@Pinkyy - light pollution is a real thing - human being sleep better in the dark - according to Harvard - "light exposure can cause our biological clock to advance or delay, which affects our sleep and wake cycle. ... Exposure to light in the middle of the night can have more unpredictable effects, but can certainly be enough to cause our internal clock to be reset, and may make it difficult to return to sleep."

This article says very clearly that darkness is essential for sleep:

"Darkness is essential to sleep. The absence of light sends a critical signal to the body that it is time to rest. Light exposure at the wrong times alters the body's internal "sleep clock"—the biological mechanism that regulates sleep-wake cycles—in ways that interfere with both the quantity and quality of sleep. Melatonin, a hormone produced in the brain's pineal glad, is often known as the "sleep hormone" or the "darkness hormone." Melatonin influences sleep by sending a signal to the brain that it is time for rest. This signal helps initiate the body's physiological preparations for sleep—muscles begin to relax, feelings of drowsiness increase, body temperature drops. Melatonin levels naturally rise during the early evening as darkness falls and continue to climb throughout most of the night, before peaking at approximately 3 a.m. Levels of melatonin then fall during the early morning and remain low during much of the day. Evening light exposure inhibits the naturally timed rise of melatonin, which delays the onset of the body's transition to sleep and sleep itself."

MeyMary · 05/09/2018 11:54

@Pinkyy

I see what you mean and I'm fairly certain that users would be more understandable if it was just a small porch light. Or one of these low to the ground, solar ones...

It's a bit like people who need/want background noise during the night. Very few neighbours would complain about a sound machine, a (low-ish volume)TV in the living room etc. Probably because it's unlikely to have an impact on the noise level in their own home.

Someone with a loud radio in their front yard? Not so much.

And noone would expect the neighbours to close the windows (to tune out the sound), would they?

Pinkyyy · 05/09/2018 12:19

Perhaps if I experienced it I'd feel differently, it seems people are speaking from personal experience. I live detached in the countryside and nearest neighbours about half a mile away so we keep outside lights on because there is no light at all where we live

MeyMary · 05/09/2018 12:24

so we keep outside lights on because there is no light at all where we live

I must admit, I personally honestly don't see the issue.

Pinkyyy · 05/09/2018 12:26

MeyMary

I just find it a bit scary to be honest, there's just fields surrounding our grounds, we have CCTV too- people are entitled to any measures they want to go to in order to feel safe

MeyMary · 05/09/2018 12:40

I just find it a bit scary to be honest

Fair enough.

people are entitled to any measures they want to go to in order to feel safe

I think we both know that this simply isn't true.

I personally admittedly wish there were more laws and regulations in regards to light pollution.

Jux · 05/09/2018 12:43

people are entitled to any measures they want to go to in order to feel safe

Well they're not really. You may be, because it's unlikely that anything you do would impact other people as you're nicely isolated.

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