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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be surprised by this message

45 replies

Lookingok123 · 02/09/2018 19:27

A female relative I’ve not seen for ages emailed me to say she has got herself into just under 5,000 debt and could I help her pay it off?
I don’t really see her , not for any reason, just because she’s a relative I don’t keep in touch with regularly
Anyway was surprised by message and her saying how are you but not making any small talk in the message apart from that
I emailed her back explaining I couldn’t help (know technically I didn’t need to go into detail but was explaining that I didn’t have anything to spare each month once I’ve paid mortgage etc etc etc ) and suggested a service I’ve heard of which I know have helped others
Was just then surprised also that there was then silence and she didn’t reply back saying something like no worries, thanks anyway, I understand
Just thought most folk would probably make a tiny bit of small talk in a message like that and then message back to say they understand or something?

OP posts:
ajandjjmum · 02/09/2018 19:28

Are you sure it was genuinely from her?

MoodyMumOfOne · 02/09/2018 19:30

I agree with you but perhaps she felt awkward or embarrassed do you think?

Singlenotsingle · 02/09/2018 19:30

She's a bit of a CF, isn't she? Shock

countryrosepink · 02/09/2018 19:30

Sounds like a scam email I've had before, signed off by the person the email belongs to etc

Twotailed · 02/09/2018 19:30

I would assume she’s been hacked - maybe call or text to ask just in case?

PositiveVibez · 02/09/2018 19:30

Sounds like someone has hacked her email and it's a scam. Like one of them 'I'm stranded on holiday and need money to get home'

didyouseetheflaresinthesky · 02/09/2018 19:30

Its a scam, she's been hacked. They don't respond unless you say yes.
I've had it from at least 3 of my facebook friends this year. You ought to text her and let her know.

Original poster
Lookingok123 · 02/09/2018 19:30

Yes it definitely was - from her email address and she sent me a text just saying that she had sent me the email

OP posts:
LampHat · 02/09/2018 19:31

Was it definitely from her? Are you sure she wasn’t hacked?

LampHat · 02/09/2018 19:32

X-posted! Her phone/email may both have been hacked?

NotTakenUsername · 02/09/2018 19:32

Her phone and email could be hacked though. Could you call her and ask?

CookPassBabtridge · 02/09/2018 19:33

She sounds not only like a huge CF, but also one with no manners or social skills..

MumOfTwoMasterOfNone · 02/09/2018 19:35

What Cook said!

Original poster
Lookingok123 · 02/09/2018 19:42

I’m certain it was her and it would be too awkward then to call and check as she would answer
I guess I’ll have to put it down to social skills / being blatant in asking

OP posts:
Havaina · 02/09/2018 19:44

I'm not surprised.

Had a (not very close) relative invite himself to stay for 2 weeks, he wanted to go out to eat alot but didn't once get his wallet out. We went away for the weekend while he was here, he invited himself along, I agreed on the understanding he would pay for his own hotel room. He also asked me to do internet shopping for him on my card. Checked with him that he had the cash to pay me and he said yes.

So he owes me £300 by now, and hasn't paid a penny and he's leaving the next day. I stop the car at the ATM so he can get money out just before he goes back. He acted all butt hurt 🙄.

He's not going to be able to invite himself to mine ever again.

GingerCatBigBalls · 02/09/2018 19:46

Sounds like a hack - don't do anything until you've spoken to her in person.

GladAllOver · 02/09/2018 19:47

If she has got herself into debt, it's her job to get herself out of debt. Not yours.

GoldilocksAndTheThreePears · 02/09/2018 19:49

There is a scam like this, all a scammer needs is a phone, and they contact anyone who has both email and phone listed in contacts. Looks very legit but isn't. Could be that here.

Havaina · 02/09/2018 19:50

I don't think it's a hack. OP would be able to tell.

Plus OP has no intention of lending her the money so doesn't need to do anything.

GingerCatBigBalls · 02/09/2018 19:55

"I don't think it's a hack. OP would be able to tell."

That statement would almost be funny if it weren't for all the victims who have been conned out of thousands of pounds by exactly this sort of scam.

NotTakenUsername · 02/09/2018 19:58

I think you are quite unkind and irresponsible to not alert her to the fact she may have been hacked.

Original poster
Lookingok123 · 02/09/2018 20:01

Just to clarify , part of the message contained information that no one else could know
ie there’s absolutely no way a hacker could know certain things that were in the email -that’s why I know it’s from her

OP posts:
Havaina · 02/09/2018 20:04

Ginger

I don't dispute that the scam works.

I just credit OP with the sense to know if it's her relative texting/emailing her.

If OP was planning to give her relative the money then I agree she should call her.

And again, I would credit OP with the sense to call her relative and check that it's actually her before sending her the money.

I think it's pretty funny that people are giving OP such basic advice, as if she's a ninny.

Havaina · 02/09/2018 20:05

Cross post with OP

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 02/09/2018 20:07

In your OP it says there wasn't anything else in the message apart from hi how are you and lend me 5k. Confused