Scared.. am about to get burgled?

[BananaSpljt]

My own stupid fault I know. Been trying to sell quite a high value item on fb for a while now, really need the money and keep getting let down by prospective buyers. Somebody said they could pick it up yesterday afternoon so I gave them my address.

Then they said they couldn't come until 10pm. I said that wasn't convenient (dangerous) but they could come today, said text before coming as I will make sure either I or my boyfriend's home (I'm actually single, live alone with my toddler).

They said they'd come around 7.30. I spoke to my DM and she said was a bad idea - it's a young man, 20 max. Just feels dodgy. So I messaged him this morning saying really sorry but it had been sold. No reply.

From exactly 7.30 somebody has been thumping on my door every few minutes. They've still not left. It's making me so anxious. And my little window in the kitchen is open, though would have to jump over the back gate to get to that, and the window is v little.

Dunno, I'm just really scared. Why would you knock for half an hour if you weren't planning on robbing somebody? Luckily my DD is in bed with me. I'm just waiting for some glass to smash or to hear footsteps up the stairs. Luckily I have a police marker already on my house due to DV so hopefully they'd come quickly. I suffer with severe anxiety as it is. Feel like I'm going to have a panic attack

They wouldn't bang that long of they were going to break in - just a check you were out then sneak around the back.

Sounds like it's them and they are hoping you are on. Is the item a really good bargain?

Try not to panic. They wouldn't be thumping on your door if they were going to break in. It draws too much attention.

Maybe they didn’t get the message and have turned up as arranged?

I don’t think a burglar would knock continuously.

Yeah, they think that the 7.30pm meet is still on and are knocking because they are confused why no-one's answering the door

Yes, I’d say it’s the buyer who hasn’t got your message and is wondering where you are. It’s the time you arranged. If he’s knocking on the door he’s not intending to burgle you, he’s just trying to make a purchase. Why not go and tell him you aren’t selling? From inside the door if you are scared.

Agree, doesn't sound like a bugler, but a buyer who didn't get the message

Has it been sold or did you just say that so they wouldn't come? You could go answer the door and sell it? Although I understand you're anxious.

They've gone now. Was quite a few (well more than one) male voices outside.

You've all made me feel better. My sister phoned me and told me to go grab a knife and phone the police 🤦🏽‍♀️ because somebody was knocking on my door, I'm not that crazy.

Just weird to knock for 40 bloody minutes! I'm having a pretty terrible day MH wise as it is. And had been reading a scary story on reddit when the knocking started, which didn't help Also as I said I'm a victim of DV so thumping on the door is never a pleasant experience for me as in the past it's led to horrible stuff.

But calming down now reading your posts. Not sure how much sleep I'll get though worrying they'll come back. I really should have just spoke to them out of my bedroom window, as now they think the house is empty. But you're right, if you were going to burgle somewhere you wouldn't knock for all that time. Argh. Wish my brain would listen to reason. Thanks again

Why haven't you answered the door?

Has it been sold or did you just say that so they wouldn't come? You could go answer the door and sell it? Although I understand you're anxious.

Just said it so they wouldn't come. The vibe seemed off, very pushy to come at night which seemed odd. Young kid, asked him to message me before he came which he didn't do. Also he didn't message me for the 40 minutes he was outside. Surely you'd do that?

I would just open the door and sell it to him, hes come with his money to buy the item.
If someone was going to burgle you they wouldnt knock on your door loudly for half an hour drawing neighbours attention to themselves.

Why haven't you answered the door?

Because there have been burglaries in the (not nice) area, the boy was weird about having to come at night and his profile was a bit off. I have anxiety, which is particularly bad today. This thing is worth over £500. All the other reasons I've listed above. Was scared he would rob me and it's only me and my little DD in the house.

On the face of it it seems like he just didn't get your message. But banging on the door for 40 mins is aggressive behaviour.

Ignore the "what you should have done" comments. Always go with your instinct. It feels odd to you, you don't have to sell to him or answer the door. Completely your choice to make you feel the safest.

Just looked on Facebook and he had read the message saying I was selling it to somebody else? So why would he come round after seeing that? Don't get it.

Sorry for saying this and I don’t want to sound mean, but you aren’t expecting any visits from baliffs? They are persistent.

It's fine OP, stay safe and go with your gut.

Sorry for saying this and I don’t want to sound mean, but you aren’t expecting any visits from baliffs? They are persistent.

No, though now I can see that he had read the message and you're all sure he wasn't trying to rob me, I'm starting to wonder if it was my ex. The 1 year non mol order expired last week so I wonder if he knows that.

But I haven't heard anything from him for a while, and there would usually be phone calls first. And weird it was bang on the dot the Facebook boy said he was coming.

I still think it was him, if not to rob me then to come round for an argument or something? Kicking myself that I wasn't brave enough to say something out of my bedroom window though TBF I'll probably still be too scared to if they come back.

I'm not sure how to say this nicely, but how are you going to sell the item if you're never going to allow anyone around to view it/collect it?

I agree with others who say he didn't see your message (he may have seen it after he came round, or FB can mark messages as read if you just scroll past them but don't actually read them). Perhaps he'd come some distance, maybe there were signs that someone was in, hence his persistence?

Our neighbour asked to come after 10pm to collect a parcel that I’d taken in for him. I thought it was a bit weird, but it turns out he works as a chef and that was the only time he was free. Maybe the reason for coming at night was something like that, rather than being sinister?

7:30 isnt really night, its after work for a lot of people who work during the day.

But if you felt uncomfortable maybe selling on facebook isnt the right way to do it.

I just don't get why you wouldn't message while you were at the door then? That'd be the first thing I would do if somebody didn't answer the door after a few minutes. Or text before you came like you'd agreed to do? And coming to the door with your mates? I don't know, I hope you're right and I'm just being a drama llama.

Don't beat yourself up op. You handled it really well, you're ok, they took the hint and left with no drama - that's a result. Well done.

Yeah, I think you're right. It's probably different if you have a nice DH knocking about and live in a nice area and don't have a crazy exP who has left you with massive anxiety over the safety and security of your home and your child.

Worth paying the extortionate eBay fees I guess

Don't beat yourself up op. You handled it really well, you're ok, they took the hint and left with no drama - that's a result. Well done.

Thank you. Made me feel better