To not say sorry

[Letsgetreadytorumbleagain]

Just had a big argument with OH, and I'm so angry that I've just come to bed to get away from him (which he says is childish) an I can't think straight.

It sounds so petty but we came down from putting the kids to bed and he couldn't find the remote. I said I didn't know where it was as DS (nearly 6) was watching the tv whilst I was making dinner. DH said that I should have been watching what he was doing with it, and not using dinner as an excuse.

He said things like this always happen when I'm with the kids and that he always knows what they are doing (fwiw he never cooks dinner apart from putting pizzas in the oven if umm not here and he gets home 15 mins before the kids go to bed every night).

He was getting angry saying how fucking ridiculous it that we couldn't find it and I'm always losing stuff. I said you can't watch the children (DS and DD (18 months)) all the time as I have to do stuff. He said I was being pathetic and should just apologise and not make excuses all the time

I said it's not my fault so I'm not apologising - aibu?

Just to add - I feel like he blames me for everything, he can't control the kids and is always saying to me - can't you sort them out

Why are you with him? He doesn't seem like someone you will have a happy life with.

He should get his own personal remote, maybe he could put his name on it Then put it back in his wee drawer so he'll always know where to find it.

He wanted you to apologise for the remote going walkies? WTF? He sounds like a complete arse! I'd hide his shoes or his wallet. And I certainly wouldn't be pre-cooking meals and all that jazz when you go away. Honestly, if my husband pulled a stunt like this I'd laugh in his face.

This isn't just a little thing you know. It sounds to me like he just doesn't respect you at all. If I were you I'd be looking for a job outside the house to get things on a more even financial keel, because I would be planning an exit from someone who spoke to me like that, like a servant and not an equal.

I would A. Spend the next few days shadowing the DC so that you can't cook clean or do anything else really. And
B. Piss off out at the weekend and give him a turn to parent his own kids, he needs the practice.