Ok Mumsnetters - I need some perspective on this issue which has been bugging me for a while. I've read quite a number of posts here within the last few months by women who have been cheated on by their partners. As a married woman it breaks my heart to read about the pain that these women are going through. I feel a sense of empathy as a married woman and a woman with strong values against cheating.
A bit of background- I've been friends with my friend for a very long time and we have had a very lovely relationship. She has supported me through some quite challenging periods and vise versa. She met a guy whom she dated for about two years on and off. After two years of dating she found out that he recently got married .
She was heart broken as she was pregnant with his baby. He gave it the all" I don't love her and was forced into it!" Excuse. She decided to stick with him and make something out of their relationship as she loves him.
My dilemma is this - as a married woman I am strongly against her behaviour! I think it's appalling and reading some of the posts about Married women being cheated on has left me feeling sick about the situation. Also , my values do not permit me to agree with the decision that she has taken .
Whilst I am morally against her attitude/decision , I too want to be a good friend . I want to support her as a friend and don't want to come across as a sanctimonious, righteous cow ! I am not perfect myself however I do have values which differ from hers. She seem to think that she can live a normal happy life with this man who's married to another woman .
Please help me decide on how to deal with this situation. Do I tell her how I feel and is there a nice way of doing so or do I just carry on supporting her and not say much. I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and hard place . I feel disgusted by her as I've always considered her a lovely person with similar values of mine but I feel self righteous for judging. I don't know what to do or say really ..... I find myself being bitter towards her more and more but it's none of my business really - help me