Don’t reorganise the fucking tool cupboard 2 minutes before we have to leave!

[LegsOfGlass]

Is this a man thing? DH and FIL both the same but “it needs doing”. Only then everything gets pulled out the cupboard, toddler DD delighted with all the new and dangerous toys that daddy an grandpa have got for her, I wrangle her away, tools done, then a 30 minute shit, then “where are my keys?”, then I’ll just check the tyre pressure, then I’ll just topup the screen wash.

FUCK OFF. Let’s go! We’re late! Do it later!

@TotHappy being late or not leaving on time sometimes doesn't matter, you're right ..... not the end of the world if we go for a walk at 1015 rather than 1000. Or get the 1300 bus in to town for a mooch around the shops instead of the 1200 one.
As long as you're on your own!!

Because it does matter if you're with someone else (who is on time) as you've now wasted my time. Now it genuinely doesn't matter if we go for a walk 15 minutes later than agreed .... no planes are missed, no deadlines passed ..... but I could have done something else in that time.

I couldn't live with a faffer 😂

My df is a faffer , both his dps were faffers, dm is NOT a faffer but both her dps were. With genetics like that I am a faffer
However it is helpful to put a wash on or fill the tumbler or dishwasher. Dd1 is also showing signs of faffing. Dm and Dh have long since given up

Two of my friends are like this. It drives me insane. Especially if we are travelling together somewhere. We'll make plans to catch a certain bus/train and figure out how long we have to get ready, which friends will loudly proclaim is "aaages away!!" and then, instead of getting ready, will chat/faff/waste time doing unnecessary things until it's time to leave when they fly into a flat panic yelling "what?? How is it that time?? I thought we had aaaaages!!!!" They also don't factor in little things like the walk to the bus / train station or heavy traffic in rush hour, which means they are never on time anywhere.

I live with one of these. I quit hassling. He's responsible for the time and to apologise if need be and his behaviour doesn't soak for me. The result is I'm no longer silently responsible asmr highly irritated and he's got better with time management.

I swear to God that my XH deliberately saved up craps until we were just about to go out, in order to keep me waiting for 20 minutes

My DH does this, every time 2 minutes before we need to leave "OK I'll just have a shower and a shave". Brilliant I'll tell the train to wait for you.

Can we add 'when faffers cook?'

For me, tea is between 6 and 730 depending on what we've got on. Usually if neither me or DH say otherwise then tea is always around 630.

Visit faffy relative. She'll talk about doing tea but then it'll get to 8pm and there's still no sign of tea (busy faffing). We can't make our own because that would be rude and then when we say 'so what's happening with tea? Would you like us to start?' she's all 'woah is that the time I didn't realise because I've been so busy and productive' or worse (which really annoys me), 'I hadn't realised anyone was hungry so was just going to do some picky bits'.
and for saying picky bits.

I'm a distracted faffer, but it's not a power-play of any kind, just the way I am ... I do one thing (say, take something upstairs) but then remember something else (while I'm up here, fold the washing on the airer), and then something else (maybe put another load on?), but find something else to do (tidy toys from the floor where I'm walking) ....

It annoys DH but fortunately never makes us late for anything as I'm a punctuality freak and want to arrive everywhere uber-early.

My DH does this!!!! Seems unable to prioritise!!!!!!

Jesus fucking Christ.

9pm last night “Let’s have an early breakfast and get going straight away” (All parties agree, 4.5 hour drive)

8:30am car loaded, toilet trips and dry nappies all round, traffic checked, teas made in Thermal mugs, DH getting his shoes on.

8:40am I have to investigate. DH up a ladder in FIL’s back garden with electric chainsaw. “Just sorting the hedges before we go!”

Half an hour ago he got the toddler excited about going out, put her shoes on. Now he's fucking around with a parcel he wants to send while she cries. I feel her pain.

Legs of Glass - where did you hide his body? Need an alibi?

DH isn't usually bad, but last Saturday we were out and had to drop baby DD at grandparents (so packing half the house). He went upstairs to shower, brush teeth etc while I was with DD. After this was the perfect time to print out a form - except the printer cartridge needed changing first. Which he had to find. Eventually it was done, he came into the living room and announced he will get ready, should take him around half hour. At least he had the grace to look embarrassed when I asked him how long did that then give me to get ready - from scratch!!

As it was the result was us both getting sorted and hovering over DD on the bed (which I did the lions share of!), throwing stuff into the car with raised voices of stress, and a rushed exit as usual! We did make it on time thankfully!