To ask all guests to take shoes off in my house?

[chardonm]

Just that really. A few people seem really put off by that.

My dear sil has to be reminded several times before she takes them off.

I hate the thought of trailing the dirt inside the house.

Please get some lovely warm socks to keep yourselves comfortable and preserve our floors!

Oh dear lord. It's 42C here and you want me to put "lovely warm socks" on?

Can I ask what your doormat is actually FOR if you don't allow people to wipe their feet on it, Anxious?

The more people you have marching over your carpet, the greater the chance one of them will have something nasty on their shoe. People just aren't that careful!

In my 49 years on this planet, I've had no problems with people treading dogshit or grease or chewing gum into my house.

But you're not going to believe that are you? Because when you have anxiety about this stuff, you're only going to believe the stories that reinforce your anxieties.

Oh good lord we're not allowed shoes on DOORMATS now??

All the people who are shocked at shoes off in houses, do you keep your shoes on when you're sat down watching TV? Do you wear them up the stairs, and in the bedrooms? When do you take them off?

It depends. When it's cold, I tend to change into a pair of slippers as soon as I come in as they're more comfy. I will wear these outside though if I need to. Just in the garden, not to the shops I might add!
In the warmer months I exclusively wear flip flops so I probably won't take them off till bedtime unless I'm laying on the sofa.

There's been no reply from anyone who likes shoes off, what they would do with a guest who admitted to athletes foot, and whether or not the socks/slippers get washed after every use. Anyone?

Hazmat suits for everyone.

I grew up in the Middle East where I only wore shoes (Clarks sandals!) for school; the rest of the time was flip-flops or bare feet, with shoes removed as soon as I got home for comfort. We then moved back to rural North Scotland where there was often snow or mud;slippers were normal in the house till you needed to go to the village and after (afternoon) tea.

Now I live in rural central Scotland, I wear shoes in the house a lot of the time but I love coming home and removing my boots in the front porch along with my coat. My slippers are hard soled so I do go out in the yard with them. I have arthritis in my feet so it's all about comfort in my Fitflops slippers. If I go out to friends for the evening, I often take my own soft house shoes/slippers for comfort or slip my sandals off. I just hate wearing shoes! 😂

Some houses I keep my shoes on to protect my feet from the dirt and clutter; in others I'm happy to get the bloody things off. I really must crochet various sizes of washable slippers for those who want to take muddy boots off when they come here, though I don't ask, having six dogs, two outdoor cats, wood floors and rugs.

Did I say you couldn't use a doormat?

I'm sayjng if there's something unpleasant on your shoe, a doormat won't be an effective way to get rid of it.

Are you saying that if someone wiped actual shit on your doormat, you'd just leave it there and think "job done"??

Are you saying that if someone wiped actual shit on your doormat, you'd just leave it there and think "job done"??

Every single person I've ever known who had shit on their shoe found out long before they arrived at my house.

They took their shoe off and cleaned it at that point.

I understand you won't believe this because it doesn't fit with the stories that maintain your anxiety.

Every single person who had shit on their shoe found out long before they arrived at my house

Okaaaay. Are you saying there's some sort of magical shit-detecting forcefield around your house?! Or is it possible (though it hasn't happened) for these people to have discovered the shit at a different point - say, just after they've stepped onto your carpet?

I admit I'm excessive in my worry. But what I'm suggesting is perfectly possible- and easy to prevent.

I think we should all just learn to levitate. Debate over.

And there you go Peg. Magically somehow in your world people can only smell shit after they've arrived in a house and trodden on a carpet. Somehow their sense of smell only kicks in at that point.

I would take off my shoes automatically in someone else's house because I do in my own home, but I wouldn't ask guests to take theirs off in mine. I would feel very awkward doing so.

Stupomax

Aee you suggesting that all the people on this thread who have had people tread shit into their houses are lying?? Do you think it never happens?

I'm imagining it happens more than it does - because I have issues.

But you seem to be saying it's impossible

@PurpleMac - I think it's polite to remove your shoes when visiting someone's home

To be, it's rude to take your shoes off when visiting someone's

@treaclesoda - It's not automatic to me, or most people I know, because we were brought up being told that it's incredibly rude to take your shoes off in someone else's house.

Are you Irish? Other than in Dublin, I've never been asked to remove my shoes, so I think most Irish people are the same.

Like you, I would never be so rude as to remove them unless it was family or close friends.

There's nothing I can say that will reassure you is there Peg?

But I don't need reassuring

I know that it is perfectly possible for people to tread crap into houses.

The thought of this is bad enough that, on balance, I'd rather not risk it.

You can't reassure me that it can't happen. Because it can !

But I don't need reassuring

Your post saying "I don't see how people can be so carefree about this. Wish I could be" suggests otherwise.

Fair enough. Yes, it would be more relaxing not to worry. But my worry is based on actual possibilities. You seem to be denying these.

Fair enough. Yes, it would be more relaxing not to worry. But my worry is based on actual possibilities. You seem to be denying these.

I think we assess them differently Peg. As I said earlier, your anxiety makes it difficult for you to believe me. I understand that. That's fine.

Yes, I accept that. Thank you.

It's awful to wear shoes indoors. Dogs pee (and shit) on the pavement, I've seen men spit phlegm up on the pavement. And you're walking in it. Gross!

My kids sit and PLAY on my floor. Yes I vacuum & mop but you're damn right people should take their shoes off.

MIL always wears shoes in her home, and never gets the carpets/rugs deep cleaned 🤮

Cherry, surely MiL can do as she likes in her own home - just like you. That's how normal people all lived until clean freakery became such a big deal.

It's only women's work to clean the floors after people have unnecessarily tracked grime into the house, so who cares right?! 95% of the time it won't be the man of the house cleaning the floors.

How about saving us all the extra work and leaving your dirty clodhoppers at the door. Amongst all my friends (educated professionals in work, many with kids) we take our shoes off at each other's houses out of courtesy. Probably as we all have about a 1000 better things to do than grovel around cleaning floors which have been avoidable soiled. It's just the friendly thing to do.