AIBU to message my deceitful buyers directly?

[beanbag19]

Someone please talk me down from contacting my buyers directly to tell them what I think of them!

We agreed a sale in June. At the time we knew we wanted a new build but there were none of the one we wanted available so we planned to move in with parents. Our buyers said their buyer wanted to complete by 20 August so we agreed that date. They then came back and asked for 10 August due to a holiday. I said no as we needed more time to sort things out.

From the second the offer was accepted she chased and chased. I did everything on my side as quickly as possible. When I came to booking removals, I had to book in advance as we need storage too. Before I booked I asked the EA to confirm that we were still working towards 20 August, our buyer said yes. After me chasing again on 9 August, their solicitor advised that their buyer was awaiting a revised mortgage offer and some docs from the LA. They also advised that 20 August was not possible as our buyers were actually on holiday then, despite the fact that the buyers themselves had previously requested and confirmed this date. They agreed 31 August instead.

They went on holiday on 13 August and I/my solicitor have been chasing theirs for an update. Finally they confirmed today that their sale had fallen through. Their solicitor said that they weren't even sure if our buyer knew as they had advised that they would be uncontactable on holiday and weren't back until 25 August. I told my EA who then had a call from the buyer directly to confirm the situation, apparently they got back last night, so another lie. I then searched for their house on rightmove to see that they had advertised on open house to take place on 11 August, which was two days after they agreed to 31 August completion, so they presumably knew at that time that 31 August was impossible.

In the meantime, we have moved out (because we didn't want to lose the £90 deposit we paid to the removals for the sake of two weeks) and reserved a new build that we have to exchange on in 28 days or lose. Obviously we're not going to be able to exchange.

I am livid. I need our buyers to know what absolute arseholes they are. Apparently they still want our house, which would explain why they lied about everything. But how can you do that to to people? We're losing money as we should have been saving money at my parents but instead we're paying a mortgage for a house we don't live in. We're probably going to lose the house we've been waiting 9 months for. Who is so selfish and dishonest that they would treat people like that?

Obviously I won't message them, but I needed to get that off my chest so thanks if you got to the end!

Thanks all. Some of your comments have given me some hope. I still hate them, though!

With a family member who is an estate agent, empty houses are more difficult to sell.

It's job to hate them. House selling/buying creates a weird bubble and they are probably alright people like you when not in this pressurised situation.
And...remember estate agents lie a lot, too as they need the commission!
Hope you get sorted.
Smile sweetly, exchange, then fill the curtain poles with prawns....

It's the same stupid system in Ireland. I hear words like escrow on American TV shows and I think it might be more stressful there. Is that possible!?

It sounds like the so called professionals involved havn't been completely honest with the truth / communications being fed back.

If others in the chain / estate agent/ solicitors were aware of how seriously you thought things were ie the date and that your werre moving out yet they knew it wasn't happening I'm shocked no one said anything.

This is exactly why you do nothing in terms of booking removals / arranging rented etc until you'v exchanged and have a completion date agreed.

They have messed you about but you should never have worked towards a date without having exchanged / made the date official.

Contacting them directly won't change anything Hope you get some better news very soon - House selling is so stressful at the best of times.

Instruct your estate agent to remarked the property immediately. Bollocks to the original buyers. Calculate how much it is costing you to have not sold yet and let potential buyers be aware that you will consider offers for a speedy exchange.

We really, really need to go to the Scottish system. I’m very sorry for you, OP, I had similar happen, the stress is ridiculous.

I do feel for you and your buyers are lying bastards but you and your DH have been incredibly naive! Is this the first time you’ve sold a house?

I thought you had to be a First Time Buyer to qualify for Help To Buy. I am sure you have to sign a declaration stating that. You definitely had to last year.

See how it goes but you could pop a couple of pieces of “for show” furniture back in just to dress the house up a little.

What did the builders say when you contacted them?

I would arrange with your removals to move back in from storage all the beds, the sofas, and very minimal funiture, a few pictures back on the wall etc, and stage it so it looks totally spacious.
This would then cut your storage fees as beds and sofas is a lot of volume, as well as make the house look better for a quicker sale

Yanbu. Our last house move made me cry. A lot.
We had people pull similar stunts (although never quite as close to completion) 3 times!!! 3 different buyers! We almost lost place we were buying 3 times! Even the estate agent said in the end of one of our buyers “I can’t condone you going round and putting cat shit through her letterbox, but I’d be delighted” it took us 9 months from first Sale agreed to actually complete.
Be upfront and honest with me build supplier, let them speak to solicitor and estate agent if necessary- they won’t want to lose you!

I'd be wary of contacting them because you don't know what lies the estate agents have told you or encouraged them to tell you. That does happen, we had that problem when selling a house years ago and I would never again trust an estate agent to be upfront.

They have been very wankey

But you don't have to be friends with them, you just need their money. If they are the best offer and you don't get a better offer i would (painfully) Still consider them as buyers

Agree with @Rebecca36. Estate agents and solicitors tell all kinds of lies the vendors don't even know about. We once got a letter from an estate agent in our chain saying that if we didn't move more quickly the first time buyers at the bottom of the chain wouldn't be able to go ahead - then gave loads of specifics why they would pull out. Problem was we were the first time buyers at the bottom of the chain, everything they'd written was lies and bollocks. they had mixed up the letters, our threatening letter had gone to someone further up the chain.

Are the buyers looking to break the chain? - and are to borrow from elsewhere? Have you been told by the solicitors that they definitely not going ahead?

Never do anything before exchange . Nothing is binding before that

This is so true, though I understand why you did OP.

Shoe was on the other foot with me. I found a place I wanted to buy in the U.K. when I lived overseas. I had three months leave to sort it, wanted it bought and furnished with the intention of letting out. I only looked at properties that could complete in this time (I was a cash buyer) and chose this one on the proviso it would be a quick sale.

The owner was a liar. She had no intention of moving to her new bungalow within 6 months because it wasn’t built. Her and her EA decided that as I wasn’t going to live in the property (straight away) and was a “rich ex pat”, that they could string me along. I needed the sale completed by September. The seller’s new place wouldn’t be finished until the following February at the earliest.

Long story short, I meant it and in September I pulled out and went back overseas. Silly owner had signed the contract on her bungalow though. She was horrified. She was committed for 5 months time with no buyer. She managed to get my personal details (her EA in a panic I think as they had advised her) and rang me hysterically. There was nothing I was going to do, I would wait until the following year’s leave and look again. She had cost me solicitors fees, survey, loads of other expenses..

I wonder what happened to her? I suppose she lost her deposit or had to get a bridging loan or something.

People are selfish OP. I hope you get a quick quick sale.

does the builder you're buying from offer any of the schemes like Easymover (I think that's the Taylor Wimpey one but I think most builders offer similar) where you reserve the property and they market your existing property through several estate agents? I think you take a slight hit on the sale price though but it may be worth doing that as it reserves the property in the meantime (depending on the developer).

Don't message them, save your energy. They're timewasting assholes of course but they're in lots and lots of company. House buying and selling brings out the worst in people. I last moved over a decade ago, and we had ELEVEN chains collapse because of people lying, double dealing, gazundering, jumping ship at the last minute one way and another or just being bats and never having any intention of buying the damn place. It took us two years to move, all the while on a punitively expensive mortgage deal that had superseded an expired fixed-rate deal - we kept thinking there was no point remortgaging as we'd be moving at any moment. I think the lowest point was finding that prospective buyers #5 or 6 had instructed BT to change the phone into their name without our knowledge or permission. By the time it was all sorted out, I'd lost my 'memorable' business line number...and they'd fucked off into the sunset with their financial status unveiled for the tissue of lies it was. And that was just the buyers. The sellers were just as bad, and don't even get me started on the estate agents and solicitors.

The lesson is not to judge people by your own standards. Most of us are honest and straightforward, but there are no depths to which buyers carried away by the thrill of the chase will not stoop.

All these years later it still gives me the rage when I think of those people.

What does your contract with them say?

I don't understand how the buyers can "pull out"? Don't the prospective buyers have a contract with the sellers?

I've sold two houses and bought three in the US and haven't ever encountered this problem.

We thought we had sold until the last minute when our buyer's buyer dropped his offer to them by £2k.

Our buyers very kindly wanted to share the price decrease with us by £1k each. The got a blunt 'no', as at the time it was at the bottom of the housing recession and we were practically giving it away .

We stayed put & extended the house instead.

@SusieQ - the procession the UK is very different to the US. You don’t write a contract straight away. First, you look, then you put an offer, there is a little negotiation and if the offer is accepted, you exchange contracts. Surveys are frequently carried out prior to exchange. When you exchange contracts, you decide the completion date.

It can take far too long to get to exchanging contracts which is the point at which you are mostly (not completely) safe.