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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

visitor wanted escort to buy eggs

109 replies

CoalTit · 22/08/2018 14:14

My brother and his girlfriend came to stay in my share house in a trendy area with lots of good, cheap restaurants well within walking distance. Last time he came to stay he was single, chatty and easy-going and fun to have around, so I was looking forward to it.
On my day off and in the mornings I took them out to places I thought they'd like. I work from 3pm until 10pm. She informed me that he had refused to go out for dinner so they didn't have any when I was at work.
I gave them my bed, with mosquito net, and slept on the sofa. She informed me in the morning that he was annoyed by the mosquitos.
The day before they left she wanted to show her apreciation by making walnut pancakes, but we didn't have enough eggs. I wanted to rest far more than I wanted pancakes, so I tried to give her directions to the shops, but she wasn't having any of it; we had to go out (on foot) in the heat to find a shop open. My brother stayed on the sofa.
I was resentful. I made a snotty comment about her wanting to show off by making pancakes. She looked really offended. She loves cooking and is good at it. She felt she was doing something nice for me.
I suppose we were all being unreasonable, but from most unreasonable to least?

OP posts:
DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 22/08/2018 15:35

Was your brother really complaining, or was this a case of her complaining but blaming it on her partner ? (I have a relative who does this and their poor spouse never knows anything about it!).

Ellisandra · 22/08/2018 15:37

You’re the most unreasonable because you were rude to her.
You are the only person that we know the true situation about, as you’ve posted, and by your own admission you made a snotty comment. You wouldn’t have been unreasonable to say no to the egg getting - but you were wrong to be rude.

She’s next most unreasonable, for being an irritating tattle tale. What did she tell you about the mosquitos?

I think your brother is (possibly) getting lynched unfairly here. Maybe he thought you two were bonding over the eggs? Maybe he just commented in a general way that mosquitos are fuckers (true) not expecting his weird GF to dress that up as a complaint against you personality? Maybe the didn’t go out to dinner because this was a low budget visit and she was expecting him to pay and that wasn’t what they’d discussed? I’d want more info before blaming him.,

LowPainThreshold · 22/08/2018 15:37

Came here for the prostitute story, stayed for the comments.

AnotheBloodyChinHair · 22/08/2018 15:38

my share house in a trendy area with lots of good, cheap restaurants well within walking distance

I've had a shit holiday so I want to know where you are

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 22/08/2018 15:41

Had mental image of some bizarre fetish behaviour including purchase of eggs.
I found the other mozzie complaint, walnut pancake incident paled in comparison and am leaving to find a thread about an escort actually buying eggs because i'm sure someone will have started one by now

Strugglingtodomybest · 22/08/2018 15:42

I think you were mean for the comment, your brother is lazy and his girlfriend might be a bit wet, but that depends on where you live as there are certain places where I wouldn't like to go to the shops on my own untill I was more used to it.

Goostacean · 22/08/2018 15:44

Excellent thread.

EvilRingahBitch · 22/08/2018 15:47

I’m assuming from the mosquito net that when you say “trendy area” you don’t mean Islington, and I’m guessing that your DB and GF are visiting you from the U.K. and are a shade outside their comfort zone. When you get to know somewhere well it’s really easy to underestimate how intimidated a newcomer might be (speaking as a South Londoner who happily strolls down streets which would give rural MNers a fit, but gets super-twitchy anywhere North or East of the Circle Line). Are you living in the fashionable West End of Brazzaville or Cairo OP?

SnowyAlps · 22/08/2018 15:47

That was disappointing after the title.

Your brother, followed by you, then her. You did ask

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 22/08/2018 15:51

YABU not to get the recipe for walnut pancakes for me us all...

CatPatrol · 22/08/2018 16:00

I thought this would be about your visitor hiring a prostitue to go and buy their groceries. I have to say I’m a tad disappointed.

And me. I had high hopes for this thread.

marvellousnightforamooncup · 22/08/2018 16:00

She was a twat for being an annoying, prissy, Instagram pancake maker incapable of shopping by herself.

He's a lazy git.

They're both twats for not finding themselves a restaurant.

I find you blameless because house guests are a pain in the arse so any minor misdemeanor on their part is amplified by their being in your house. My advice is to move somewhere next door to a co-op or to a bedsit with no guest room.

CatPatrol · 22/08/2018 16:01

I think you are the most unreasonable for luring us in with your heading that has no relevance to what happened!

imnotreally · 22/08/2018 16:03

The other thread makes a whole lot more sense now 😂

FranticallyPeaceful · 22/08/2018 16:03

Hang on a minute, there’s no prostitute in this story

KinkyEggscort · 22/08/2018 16:11

@mumsiedarlingrevolta I don't know what you mean, I'm sure....

Original poster
CoalTit · 22/08/2018 16:25

My thread title seemed relevant to me. I didn't realise how dirty-minded you all are!
I thought there might be more people chastising me for my low standard of hospitality.
I agree that my comment was awful. I was trying to continue doing the "smile and ignore" thing so often recommended on here, but I was getting very frustrated after several days of it, and it seemed so obvious to me that it's not such a gracious gesture if you oblige the unenthusiastic recipient to help you make it.

OP posts:
SchadenfreudePersonified · 22/08/2018 16:27

In the shell they look like brains. Out of the shell, the halves look like lungs

So does that mean they help you breathe more easily - like Tunes?

SchadenfreudePersonified · 22/08/2018 16:28

I didn't realise how dirty-minded you all are!

You can't have been a member of this forum for very long.

Original poster
CoalTit · 22/08/2018 16:38

@BarbaraofSeville
Part of the reason it bothers me is the change in my brother. He was so nice for a few years of his twenties and now he's gone all quiet and surly and distant just like his/our father and uncles.

OP posts:
Original poster
CoalTit · 22/08/2018 16:44

@AnotheBloodyChinHair and others who liked the sound of my neighbourhood,
I do not recommend my area for a holiday; it's very built-up, noisy and polluted.
I have a hard time seeing it as sinister, but then, as people have pointed out, I would do, wouldn't I, as I live there.

OP posts:
Shampoo0 · 22/08/2018 16:48

People change, I no longer want my brother's company since in his 30s. He turned all fake.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 22/08/2018 16:51

@kinkyEggscort you have made my day Wink
MMners never disappoint!

cariadlet · 22/08/2018 17:03

I got wrong footed by the title as well, but I wasn't as dirty minded as most of you. I thought it was going to be somebody on a farm holiday who was too scared to go to the farmhouse to buy eggs because the farmyard was full of hens/ducks/geese and they were phobic.

She was a twat for being an annoying, prissy, Instagram pancake maker incapable of shopping by herself.
That's unnecessarily harsh. She might have just been someone who likes cooking and was trying to do a nice thing. She might have been a bit wet not to go out on their own, but lots of people have a poor sense of direction and/or are bit anxious about going out on their own in an unfamiliar area.

btw, which country/city are you in with trendy restaurants and mosquito nets? Do your db and his gf live in the same country?

Ihuntmonsters · 22/08/2018 17:03

Sounds like your area might be a bit intimidating, and the mention of mosquito nets suggests another language may have been involved. So I wonder if the girlfriend felt anxious about venturing out on her own. Sorry your brother has changed from someone fun to being around to an arsey git. Not surprising that you weren't the tip top host you probably were aiming to be

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