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Original poster

Travelling in India?

66 replies

FirstVisit · 22/08/2018 00:17

Hi all, I've occasionally considered doing some solo travelling in India. Am in my 50s. Just interested in the culture, etc. Am fairly happy travelling and being on my own, though I would consider group travelling as long as not too scheduled, and as long as it wasn't too expensive.

Have other people travelled to India alone/in a group and enjoyed the experience? Or was it stressful?

OP posts:
Todamhottoday · 23/08/2018 10:45

Just got back in from shopping, whilst waiting for my driver with a load of veg etc. a group of about 10 lads (15-18) just stood as close to me as possible to take selfies, of course not asking I moved so they just stood in front of me, and believe me you have not been stared at until you get this kind of sneering, vile stare.

What did I have on a pair of loose long trousers, long sleeved shirt that covers front and backside, a duppata (scarf), hair up, bloody hell just bugger off......

TuftyBum · 23/08/2018 11:36

I'd go with a group tour, not solo. If you travel with someone else, make sure it is a man (although you will have to accept that in certain situations the man is the only one recognised and you will be completely ignored, like you do not exist).

I looked after employees living in a city in Southern India on assignment and have visited there myself. I was told categorically not to go out on my own. The only western women who walked anywhere by themselves would be in a certain ex pat district and this would be from the local shop to their home only, so a very short distance and even then it was rare.

Eminybob · 23/08/2018 11:50

I travelled in India when I was 21 with my brother and my then boyfriend.
I absolutely loved it, and would recommend it as a place to travel, but no, I wouldn’t travel alone.
The one time I attempted to walk anywhere alone from a party back to my room, I was followed, so I had to turn back.
I was also groped whilst being dressed in a sari in a sari shop, my boyfiend was in the next room.
And most randomly, a man asked my boyfriend if he could sleep with me (as if it was his choice to make!)

shapeshifter88 · 23/08/2018 11:52

we were stalked and harassed daily in India (all over) by men when there were 3 girls. it was awful.
my friend went with her boyfriend and had no trouble.

IThinkImParanoid99 · 23/08/2018 11:57

I travelled solo in India (Delhi, Rajasthan, Varanasi) for a month when I was 27. Had a few groping incidents but I was fine and didn’t actually feel that unsafe because there are just so many people around all the time. All the bad experiences I have had have been in western countries.

Once I got myself some local clothes I found the attitudes much more respectful. I wore a false wedding ring too and buddies up with other travelers I met along the way. It’s an amazing place.

discopisco · 23/08/2018 12:05

I'm Asian with family links to Pakistan/India and wouldn't ever dream of travelling solo to either countries. The lecherous stares/comments/touch have been enough to keep me away from both countries for over a decade.

Be safe, not sorry OP.

empties · 23/08/2018 12:06

I have travelled in India by myself. I think it would be good to pick a more low key area first. I would have said Kerala but the very recent flood may mean a wait is needed.
Airport transfers can be arranged in advance and if you want the full service job you can do this through Trailfinders, in fact they could organise an itineary, or maybe book an activity eg yoga package and an add on somewhere. At 50 I think it opens options, this is the plus side of aging- less attention than when we were young and nubile. Remember being swarmed by small children at a railway station and feeling panicky but discovered they were only trying to give me something I had dropped. I would book 1st class trains. I try and make a good plan and have booked train travel and internal air travel before I leave by myself.
Find that if you plan and are not a partier, solo travel can be exhilirating.

firehousedog1 · 23/08/2018 12:10

I travelled around India with a girlfriend from uni and I'm sorry to say we pestered down every street. I would advise not travel alone in India.

Todamhottoday · 23/08/2018 12:17

empties, Im not exactly a spring chicken, but still get the aggro.

Even get it with my other half and hes a big guy.

mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork · 23/08/2018 12:26

I used to travel a lot alone to Asia/SE Asia/Antipodes on my own. I have been to India about 5 times, for 2-3 months at a time. The last time I went I was in my mid-thirties, I think. I think it is safe if you are sensible, dress in a (regarded as by locals) respectable way, make sure you safeguard your possessions as much as possible at all times, particularly on trains and in the street. Don't go for a walk alone in a town/anywhere if you have bad vibes about the place (always listen to your vibes). That makes it sound awful but it isn't at all. You get used to these things and, in my opinion, India is great. BUT be prepared that for the first 2-3 weeks you are very likely to suffer severe culture shock and wonder why on earth you went there. Stick it out and you will then suddenly realise you are settling in and enjoying yourself and appreciating the local people. (or, like the friend I initially went there with, carry on hating it, in which case, get yourself on a 'plane out of there but do give it a period of trial first). Last time, I was waiting to buy a train ticket in New Delhi and the woman next to me was a British Indian lady who had come over with her husband for a wedding in the Punjab. It was her first trip to India. She asked me if I was British and, when I said I was, she said "Oh, thank goodness. It's awful, isn't it! All these people, all the noise!", so it is a culture shock for all at first - press of people, traffic noise, dirt, smells - though some smells are lovely spicy, scented ones. I am pretty sure she would have enjoyed her trip once she got used to things but it was not what she was expecting and she was still reeling from having only been in India less than 24 hours (turns out she'd been on my 'plane from London) . On my last trip, I was worried about being older than the majority of the backpackers (gap years had started by then) and not being able to find any like-minded travellers to talk to but I need not have - I met several people on my travels who were 50-ish and travelling alone (men, mostly) - one Englishman had always promised himself he'd go to India and when his 50th birthday came along he treated himself to that as a birthday present. His wife, it turned out, wasn't too pleased and when he went home she left him. I also recall a nice Swedish fireman who had managed to get a grant to visit the firestations of India in a "research" capacity. Indians are great, funny, kind, hospitable, helpful (obviously not all) and mostly a pleasure to get to know. You may well be groped (especially in crowds), just sharpen those elbows and give them a dig. There are more good people than sleazy people though. I always stayed in cheap hotels (occasionally backpacker hostels).

Destinysdaughter · 23/08/2018 12:33

I spent 4 months in India in 2012 at the age of 47. The only problems I faced were being stared at a lot, getting chatted up by young men and constant diarrhoea! I never felt unsafe or threatened. I didn't much like the cities, so went to smaller places and a few ashrams. Happy to discuss with you in more detail if you want to pm me. Personally I had a fabulous time, found most pp to be helpful and friendly and every day was an adventure!

Urbanbeetler · 23/08/2018 12:33

I had several Indian holidays on my own in my late 40s . I think age helps a lot - you seem to be seen as an auntie rather than a potential victim.

I would recommend the YWCA hostels for cheap, clean, and safe places to stay. You can get your own room if you book in time.

Evenings were restricted more I found - generally I ate early and stayed in reading. Don’t share autoricks or taxis with friendly fellow travellers (male). And arrange ravel from airports in advance as you do get mobbed.

Urbanbeetler · 23/08/2018 12:35

I had a brilliant time.

Ereshkigal · 23/08/2018 12:41

I travelled around India for two weeks as a solo woman on a shoestring budget at the end of an eight week trip in Asia in early 2012.

It was stressful on occasion. I did get hassled and sexually harassed. I didn't like Delhi. I hated Agra town but wouldn't have missed the Taj Mahal and Agra Fort for the world. I also met some lovely people both locals and fellow travellers.

It helped that some of my SE Asian trip had been challenging but even so was a culture shock. I went on the train to Goa from Agra. Goa was the best bit. Trains are tricky to book, I found that quite stressful. But the journey itself (about 30 hours, air con sleeper train) was quite pleasant.

Getting an Indian visa in Thailand was also a massive pain in the arse, but that probably doesn't affect you! Get it in good time.

Ereshkigal · 23/08/2018 12:45

As a vegetarian I also loved everything I ate which was a big plus!

Destinysdaughter · 23/08/2018 12:45

This website has some good info on travelling in India

www.indiamike.com/

Watching all the recent tv programmes about India has really made me want to go back there!

DrunkUnicorn · 23/08/2018 13:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hazell42 · 23/08/2018 13:16

One of my work colleagues went last year and I have booked to go myself next year.
Go for it.
You will only know what you are missing if you don't miss it.

Destinysdaughter · 23/08/2018 13:53

I agree every region is v different. I was mainly in Southern India and had no problems there. I spent a few days in Delhi but met up with a male Indian friend there so wasn’t on my own.

On the news the chief of police in Delhi had recently made the shocking statement that if a woman was out at night after 8pm and was sexually assaulted it was her own fault. Shock

PolytheneSam · 23/08/2018 14:03

There is also the issue of what you would do in case you got sick or violently ill with food poisoning.

You need to make sure you have access to medical care.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/08/2018 15:06

So glad to see this thread as I'm hoping someone will be kind enough to offer advice

I've always wanted to visit India and would probably book a tour, but I don't want to be completely "closed off" from local experiences in a hermetically sealed, only mixing with the group sort of way. Someone mentioned tours which do the sights and let you experience the culture too, so I wonder if anyone can point me in the right direction for such a tour?

If it's relevant I'm in my early sixties and would travel with a cousin of similar age

Urbanbeetler · 23/08/2018 15:09

The medical care in India is very often phenomenal. They have some of the best clinicians in the world. You will need insurance to access it though.

LoisCommonDenominator84 · 23/08/2018 15:26

Puzzled Audley Travel are great for that stuff. Pretty expensive but worth it for a destination like India I think.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 23/08/2018 15:39

Thanks very much, Lois - I'm off to look right now Grin

lightonthewater · 23/08/2018 15:46

My daughter spent a month travelling in India with a friend earlier this year. She and her friend travelled with a driver most of the trip, he was booked for them through a hostel in Delhi . The rest of the time they traveled by train. The driver tried to get them to have a threesome with him at one point. They were told categorically not to travel without a driver as it wasn't safe. I was so relieved when they were out of the country. I do not think it is a safe country to travel in as a woman. If even the driver was trying it on, i hate to think what would have happened if they had travelled alone.

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