Baby/toddler groups

[Creeper8]

I Have 4 children and have never been to any baby/toddler groups. Its come up as question from HCPs occasionally over the years and whenever I say I never attended them its met witha raise eyebrow! Aiu for never taking my kids to them? Has anyone else not been to them?

@AndBabyMakes3 there are lots of different ones, so just look on their websites/FB pages or give them a call. I help out with an NCT bumps & babies group which is for pregnant ladies and babies right from birth, so we get some absolutely teeny ones there! I also used to volunteer at a breastfeeding cafe until we ran out of funding, so again lots of newborns there. Some of the church hall type ones tend to have slightly older more mobile children. Round my way there are loads of franchised baby classes (Baby Sensory, Sing & Sign, various baby swimming classes etc) which we started going to at about 6-10 weeks, but it's by no means essential to start them that early. At that age it's really more for the mums to socialise, the children don't get much out of it until later, so don't put pressure on yourself to do absolutely everything at once!

I go to one. MY health visitor has asked if I go to one each time I've seen her, but that's not why I go! I go because my daughter loves it.

Nope my kids sleep in. There always on in the god damb morning.

We moved to this area 19 years ago when I had one school age and one toddler. I felt so lonely and isolated, so I forced myself to go to the local toddler group, where nobody spoke to me, so I didnt go back for a couple of weeks. I forced myself to go again, and there was a woman there I hadn't seen before, with her little girl, who was so friendly it made a world of difference. Shortly after that I took over the running of the group and did so until my DD started school. I made some wonderful friends in those years. Our DC have grown up together and are all good friends (all at uni now). We still occasionally reminisce about heating up mulled wine in the church kettle, overdosing the DC on jammy Dodgers and the disastrous coach trip to the safari park. 2 weeks ago a few of us and our now adult DC floated down the river Wye on giant inflatables and then enjoyed the music festival together. These groups are like anything else - some good, some bad. You just need to find one that's a good fit, but then again they're not everyone's cup of tea.

Realised I forgot to answer the original question. When I was on mat leave I went to LOADS - Bumps & Babies and breastfeeding cafe as I already mentioned, and we did lots of different classes. I was new to my city and didn't know anyone, so was desperate to find some mum friends. I've been back at work over a year now (DS is almost 2) and we've stopped most of them. I help run an NCT walking group every other week, and we go to an occasional drop-in music group but that's about it now. None of the local toddler groups run on my off days and there aren't any classes that are suitable at the moment - he's at that awkward stage where he won't sit still and just stare at the pretty things like tiny babies at sensory, but can't actually be taught anything properly yet. He goes to nursery 3 days a week and they are fantastic, so I'm pretty happy with his development, and being at work is good for my mental stimulation and sanity, so I'm not too bothered about the lack of official groups at the moment.

Why are they always on at baby nap times? Mine is always sleeping in the morning! Need one about 3!!!

You answered the "why" question with your post saying you are shy and stay home alone with them. It's not particularly healthy and she/he is obviously concerned about your mental health.

You are judging them on hearsay and dismissing them without ever having tried them. You may be pleasantly surprised.

I found the hv run groups useless for me mainly because as an older mum (33) I was an outsider as most of the mums were in their late teens/early 20's and we didn't really have anything in common. I did find some private groups that were much better. Older mums like myself with more in common. 5 years on they are still some of my greatest friends and support.