Guy at work blows his nose VERY loud and today I lost it. AIBU

[Sj325]

This is probably going to sound really stupid. There’s this guy I sit next to in work who’s in his mid 40’s. He’s really nice and I get on really well with him 99% of the time.

But....he blows his nose SO loud and it drives me crazy! I have said to him about it before - I’m a civil servant and have to deal with public on the phone most days, there was one day he done it while I was on a call and the lady actually started laughing and said “for goodness sake” ! I was mortified and had to apologise on his behalf but I spoke to him about it when I came off the phone.

Today he done it again while I was on 3 different calls and when I finished the 3rd call I took my head phone off and said (rather angrily) “do you really need to blow your nose like that when I’m on the phone?! It’s extremely loud you know” He looked at me rather surprised and said “oh, sorry!” Then didn’t speak to me for the rest of the day.

I know I should have approached it differently but I honestly find noises like nose blowing and extremely loud coughing and sneezing so rude!

Am I being unreasonable to be annoyed for such a thing?

I blow my nose quietly and if I have a head cold, I dab at my nose. Is it a man tho g to be so coarse?

...thing

My partner also absolutely roars a cartoon WOOAAACHOOOOO when he sneezes. He says he can't help it. I think it's just another tiny example of men feeling entitled to take up space and draw attention.

We're expecting a baby, so he had better learn to sneeze quietly.

Yanbu. I lost it with a colleague over a different issue a while ago. He used to try to talk to me while I was in a meeting on the phone, as in via Skype. First two times, I said politely 'I'm on the phone', which was very obvious as I had a headset on, had spoken already on it and told the team I was in a meeting. Third time he did it, I lost it. It was so rude of him to keep doing it, I just snapped at him, then wrote him a message saying it's rude to talk to people while they are in a meeting. He hasnt done it since, and did apologise.

What Herculesfan said. And nose blowing / sneezing is nowhere near as aurally annoying as the perpetual sniffer.

I’ll swap you nose blower for my sniffer/swallower

*your

It goes sniff...sniff sniff...sniff sniff sniff...SNIFF...gulp (and repeat). Honestly makes me want to heave

People sneeze. They blow their noses. It isn’t reasonable for a person who is working to try to hold it in or run to the bathroom for every nose issue. Instead of being annoyed with your coworker, you should be annoyed with your employer for not providing separation and even walls between workers.

I'm a noisy nose blower. I try to remember to be quieter in company. Fortunately I work alone and mute the phone if I need to

I knew everyone would pick you up on your grammar.

But I would like to see attention seeking trumpet noise blowing/loud sneezing made a criminal offence. Or something.

@herculesfan He doesn’t have a cold. This happens all day, everyday.

I’m not bothered by him blowing his nose, it’s the noise he makes when he does it.

I had colleague that would sneeze so loud it would make you leap out if your skin. Was quite funny if we ever had a visitor who wasn't used to it.

I hate the way my DP sneezes, there's no warning, it's a single, sudden roar, something like FRRAAAAHHHHH! Really fucking loud. He does it in public and people turn around for yards and yards, and I find myself apologising to them on his behalf. He of course just carries on oblivious...
Twice sometimes, too. One day he'll kill some little old lady with the shock of it.

@purpleartichoke we have baffle boards up. It doesn’t make a blind bit of difference though as the noise he makes is extremely loud.

@Coolaschmoola I can speak properly. Just because I made a written grammar mistake doesn’t mean that I cannot speak properly.

Thank god you’re not my Civil Service manager. You’d be a nightmare. I’d be reprimanded if I didn’t cross all the t’s and dot all the i’s.

Would you rather he just sat there with a nose full of dripping snot OP? He probably ought to do this in the bathroom given the nature of your work, but I find it a bit of an over reaction frankly. Calm down ffs!

I don't think you were unreasonable. There is never any need for that kind of thing and he must be aware it affects your ability to speak to people on the phone. Well done.

Not liking sniffing doesn’t mean you have misophonia

Meant to say, some nose blowing is reasonable of course but no need for foghorn sound effects! 😀

Yea, I don’t mind nose blowing/sneezing...etc. It’s just when people do it REALLY LOUD it irritates me. There’s no need for these sounds to be overly exaggerated. It’s just plain rude, in my opinion.

I do feel bad for snapping at him tho and I will apologise for it tomorrow.

I think you were a bit rude tbh...my husband is a big nose blower (has a big hooter) probably not as often but he can blow his nose and literally make a hole in a tissue if its not substantial ...imagine now the poor bloke will be worried about literally blowing his nose a normal thing in case you might snap again?? not kind... he could have sinus problems maybe you should actually talk to him before berating him.. not surprised he didn't talk to you for the rest of the day everyone's nose and sound is different...now sniffing that's another thing altogether

@tinkobell his nose isn’t dripping with snot. He doesn’t have a cold. There’s nothing in his nose to blow out!! Weird as this may sound, I can tell by the sound it makes there’s nothing there. He just puts a hanky up to his nose every 10 minutes and makes a really loud ‘nose blowing’ noise.

He could blow his nose somewhere away from the desk. Or as I do, have a good nose blow before leaving the house in the morning, so reducing the need the rest of the day.

I would find that really annoying. I can understand why you eventually snapped, although probably could have been more tactful, but really YANBU.

Can the sneery grammar police please have a look at their rude and ignorant behaviour, instead of worrying about other posters' command of the English language.