To make DD wear braces?

[AjasLipstick]

We're in Australia but before we emigrated, we saw an NHS dentist who said DD, then aged almost 11, did qualify for an NHS brace as she has a quite noticeable overbite.

Anyway...she's now 14 and we went to see the orthodontist here...it's taken this long to get to the head of the queue to qualify for financial support for her braces.

Orthodontist has today explained what braces she'll need and for how long (just over a year) and she's come home fuming that she doesn't want them, she is perfectly fine with the way her teeth look etc.

She says we're all too obsessed with looks and it's shallow.

this from a kid who 6 months ago wouldn;t have a photo of herself smiling!

She's very image conscious and is always doing hair and makeup etc.

I think it's just nerves. She HAS grown into her teeth a lot this year but still has a little elfin like lower jaw and a pronounced overbite.

AIBU to insist? She'll get to 21 and tell me off for not making her! Then it will cost her thousands.

As it is, it's only costing us the equivelant of 500 pounds. That's a BIG discount here in Oz.

I wish my mum had pushed me to do it, she just accepted my decision as a teen - and I’ve had to live with crap teeth ever since. They really don’t know what’s best for themselves and their health etc. which is why they aren’t legally allowed to smoke or have sex. I get the idea of giving your child/tenn bodily autonomy, but they really and truly don’t know what’s best for themselves for the most part. It’s a health issue as much as anything else, it will cause issues further down the line some way or another.

I think this is an occasion when parents get the say. 12 mths goes in the blink of an eye. My DS had them in for 12mths to help expand his palate, it went fast. He’ll need them again in a couple of years, it’s not negotiable.

"What are you going to do, hold her down and force them in her mouth? You can’t make her, you can try and convince her of the benefits but that’s all you can do."

This from a previous poster up thread. To the 'Just make hers'. How? Yes, you can present is as non negotiable "It's happening" etc, all you like, but truth is if she digs her heels in and outright refuses, if she is not on board, no one can physically force her to submit to it.

It's not that I don't think she should have it done...and she may well regret not doing so in years to come, but the bottom line is at 14 she has a certain amount of agency and cannot be treated like a truculent toddler refusing to have her jabs.

Delicious I understand some teens would do that...dig their heels in. But DD won't do that.

She's not given to all-out rebellion and to be fair, she's never really HAD to do anything. We're very relaxed about most things...she has all the freedom she wants within reason and she's usually very mature and level-headed.

So I am confident this was just down to reality hitting after her appointment because she sees it's real...the next appointment will be fitting.

Place marking to read later, I’m having similar issues with my ds

My DD is 10 and has just started with twin blocks. She has/had a 15mm overjet. The twin blocks are horrendous - she can’t shut her mouth properly and she’s under strict instructions by the orthodontist to not remove them, even for cleaning.

Despite the pain and discomfort, she’s been a total champ and we have already noticed an improvement so that’s spurring her on. We are at the early stages of 18mo of treatment and she’ll move to train tracks in a year but she’s looking forward to that (the coloured tiles help!).

I have great teeth (I really do, not a brag) so I didn’t have to have braces but all I kept selling to DD, was that she would be done with braces by year 8, when a lot of kids were starting treatment.

@AjasLipstick
Interesting to know - I'll have to do some investigating (I'm unfortunately closer to the starving than even the 'not rich' end of the scale - alas!).