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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Selfish buggy users on buses

88 replies

SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 16:41

Aibu to think if you take your child in to a bus in a buggy, then take child out and go upstairs, that you collapse your buggy so someone else can get on, given an empty buggy counts in the only 2 rule??
First bus went past empty, second has an open buggy taking up the buggy (not wheelchair) space. She did after the driver had a word eventually collapse it so I could get on (my son was on a tube feed and o2 so I couldn't collapse ours) but grumbled and moaned.
It's like me dumping shopping bags all along the back row so no one else can sit there!!

Then someone else got on and had to collapse as we were now dull whilst some moaned from the back of the bus about how the driver shouldn't keep stopping and letting people on like this as though it's OK for me to leave 30 minutes early knowing I'll likely have to wait for a bus but God forbid anyone should be delayed 3 minutes whilst someone collapses their buggy.

And yes the wheelchair space was being used by a young girl in a wheelchair as is intended so no discussion on that.
And no it isn't sensible to collapse a pushchair besides a main road with a young child and bags of shopping when there is a chance you can get on and use the space that is there for buggies.

I just think it's utterly selfish to use a space you don't need just because you don't give a damn who else can't get on!

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/08/2018 16:47

Yes but public transport is full of selfish people- i blame the public!
People who think their bags deserve a seat, people who sit on the outside seat so you have to ask them to let you squeeze past like they are doing you a favour.
TBH I wouldnt bother getting a child out of a buggy, collapse the buggy only to then put the buggy back up to get off- just leave the kid in it.

SnuggyBuggy · 15/08/2018 16:50

I'd be worried it would get nicked if I was sat upstairs.

Original poster
SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 17:01

Well we don't live in the poshest of areas so I too might have concerns about what I left on a separate floor on a bus but I'd hope the buggy would be safe. Might have to remember this next time I need a new one hahaha

OP posts:
Pinkvoid · 15/08/2018 17:05

I’ve been there in the past transporting a double buggy to my university’s crèche 3x a week. There were times buses were too full (as in two buggies or a wheelchair were on) so we had to let them go by making me late. This happened in snow once and pouring rain a few times. It’s just something you have to get on with when you have small children and use public transport. It’s shit but what can you do. I wouldn’t have been able to collapse my very bulky double buggy whilst also juggling a young baby and toddler fwiw and I would’ve been pissed off to be tossed off a bus. Selfish? Maybe. I just needed to get to university.

Pinkvoid · 15/08/2018 17:06

Also worth noting that instead of having a go at parents trying to get places- maybe work or like me, something which would lead to a career, why don’t bus companies create adequate spaces for buggies AND wheelchairs so everyone’s happy? Just imagine that.

Stuckinthis · 15/08/2018 17:11

But how do you know all the other children didn’t have reasons to remain in the buggy like yours? I wouldn’t be collapsing down a pram for a baby a couple of months old for example.

It’s a moot point though for our bus service. Buses are very ten mins and have a wheelchair/pushchair space (in which wheelchair takes priority) and enough room for up to 3 smaller buggies or 2 pushchairs still up. I can appreciate it would be annoying if you didn’t have buses that accommodate this kind of use.

SnuggyBuggy · 15/08/2018 17:14

I think it would be way more simple if collapsing before boarding and luggage racks were the norm. The whole will I won't I be able to board seems to cause so much angst.

Original poster
SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 17:19

Stuck in this but I've said she took the toddler upstairs so clearly want in buggy. I didn't say someone should get their child out because none is more important, I was simply clarifying why I don't collapse. I only object to small, empty biggies being left open it look her 2 minutes to collapse. Not all bus drivers would be prepared to go and ask her to do it so often can't get on for an empty buggy

OP posts:
Original poster
SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 17:21

Pink void but I'm guessing your wouldn't have carted the two kids out the buggy so it was in use so totally different. No one was asked to get off, I simply wanted the EMPTY pushchair collapsex

OP posts:
Original poster
SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 17:23

Stuck in this alas irrespective of space we have a 2 rule. Even with frequent buses I can wait 30/40 minutes for a bus I can get on.

And I can't collapse because I can't get me, DS, two o2 cylinders one attached to him, feed pump running and attached to him, nappy bag and hand bag on with a collapsed pushchair on the bus. Perhaps I'm just pathetic and other people can but I can't so I don't.

OP posts:
SnuggyBuggy · 15/08/2018 17:26

Surely someone in your situation should be able to use the wheelchair space. Most people taking buggies on public transport are capable of folding just like people used to. The only issue now is no place to store a folded buggy.

IceCreamFace · 15/08/2018 17:29

@Pinkvoid did you deliberately misread the thread. The woman had a buggy that could be collapsed - she'd already taken her child upstairs she just couldn't be bothered to do it. If you have a single child with neither of you have health issues you should have a collapsable buggy and be prepared to collapse it.

IceCreamFace · 15/08/2018 17:31

To be fair I sometimes didn't bother getting my child out of the buggy space (because usually there was no need) but I certainly would have done so without complaining if someone else needed to get on who couldn't collapse their buggy.

Original poster
SleepingStandingUp · 15/08/2018 17:32

The young lady in the wheelchair space was in a wheelchair so no argument there. Tbh ds is in a standard buggy and I'm not prepared to argue for priority need if its a buggy unless it was a hospital dash etc

OP posts:
Charolais · 15/08/2018 17:38

In the 70’s and before there was a place near the door you could put your fold-up push chairs, umbrellas, suitcases etc. People would hold their babies on their laps. When I returned to England or a visit I was so disappointed to see how selfish people are now. What happened?

dobbythedoggy · 15/08/2018 17:41

It sounds like your buggy should be treated as a wheelchair op as your ds clearly can't be taken out due to his medical equipment. As the wheelchair space was needed you clearly needed to use the other space and I'd have been annoyed to hear someone grumbling in your position. I hope the driver would have asked for even a pushchair in use to be colapsed to let you on. I would certainly had no issue folding for someone in your situation.

We use public transport a lot and ds pushchair was brought with that in mind so folds 'small' and one handed. Like wise things under the pushchair are bagged if we're planning to catch the bus so they can be picked up easily and I'm not having the juggle loose things and a toddler and the pushchair. The only issue I have with folding is that there is no where to safely stow pushchair on buses anymore. On our local buses there is just a small shelf at the front of the bus where the driver usually has their bag which isn't safe or sutiable for anyother use. The space between seats is too small to accommodate toddler on lap and pushchair. It's not safe to leave it loose else where in the bus.

PixieCutRegret · 15/08/2018 17:46

Honestly, I would be more angry at the driver of the empty bus driving past you, that's really not on!

I leave my buggy unfolded unless someone needs the space. On the busses around my way there is nowhere to easily store the buggy out of the way. Was she moaning at you or just having a grumble at the lack of space?

MrMeSeeks · 15/08/2018 17:47

Yanbu, if you take the child out to sit in a seat then you can collapse the buggy. It’s selfish.

SilentEm564 · 15/08/2018 17:49

Honestly, I would be more angry at the driver of the empty bus driving past you, that's really not on!

^ This. How come the driver didn't stop? If you have to pack two bus loads of people onto one bus then it increases the chance that more than 2 people will need the space.

PixieCutRegret · 15/08/2018 17:49

Charolais I remember busses being like that in the 90s when my youngest sister was in a buggy, I wish they still had these, perfect for storing McLaren type buggies. Now busses don't have anywhere, or if they do, it's taken up with free newspapers.

Flamingo19 · 15/08/2018 17:50

What if your pram doesn’t collapse? What if you’ve got a newborn in a carrycot style pram?

SnuggyBuggy · 15/08/2018 17:55

I will never forget the time we stupidly boarded a bus home from the airport with suitcases only to realise there was nowhere for them. We sat in the disabled area until someone needed it and then we had to just put them on seats and stand next to them.

Bighouseinthesticks · 15/08/2018 18:03

They were selfish and should have folded up. I think priority for the Buggy spot (there's only one spot on our buses but you can use the wheelchair spot aswell unless a wheelchair gets on and then your supposed to vacate) should be given to very young babies in prams (or situations like the OP. Past six months everyone should have easy to fold strollers and none of the big tanks should be allowed on the bus. Its stupid kids who could well sit on a seat on the bus, taking up a stroller space. Obviously this will never happen but I can dream! I get our city bus lots and bought a one hand fold stroller especially so I can fold down easily if required

Sockwomble · 15/08/2018 18:08

I always left ds in his sn buggy rather than getting him out and used to sitting on a seat because I was worried about someone complaining about an empty buggy. I couldn't risk folding it in case he had a meltdown.

BlueBug45 · 15/08/2018 18:24

OP on London buses now if you put a buggy in the wheelchair space you aren't allowed to just leave it. This is because of incidents where the brakes haven't been applied so the buggy goes flying.

In addition some buses are now designed so there are spaces behind the back of some seats so a collapsed buggy can fit, though I've only seen it contain shopping trolleys and suitcases. In nearly all cases they have gone flying when the bus has gone round a corner forcing the owner to stand with them.

Finally due to law backed up by the 1 hour free transfer of tickets, parents with buggies are made to get off the bus if a wheelchair user needs the space. Though I don't know how it would help in your case as it wasn't obviously a wheelchair.