Sorry, posting here for traffic because I'm really worried about a meeting with social services tomorrow, and could really do with some other viewpoints.
There's so much to this that I don't think anyone could be bothered to read all of it. I'll try to summarise but apologies if I leave something out.
I'm a single parent with two kids (12 and 10) with complicated needs; ASD, severe anxiety, sleep disorders, and sensory issues. Neither of them attend school now and both have an EHCP that provides them with home tuition. They've both had involvement with CAMH which has been long winded and pretty negative and both children now feel very anxious about all forms of therapy. You can imagine from all of this that I've been asking for support for years with varying levels of success. Mostly response has been 'you're doing a great job, there's nothing else we can offer'.
Things have got worse over the past couple of months, and my youngest child's anxiety is very high; panic attacks, phobias and too scared to sleep alone. She had some upset with her dad and has chosen to cut contact, and was very disturbed by some child psychotherapy via camh.
Throughout all this I've had little involvement with social services. Somebody made an anonymous complaint about the children's care about four months ago. (Since it coincided with the trouble with my ex I'm guessing the complaint came from him or my ex mil). I cooperated, they had no concerns, I felt things were going ok and that was that. About a month ago, other agencies were not doing what they'd agreed and I was looking to see what support there might be. I asked for an assessment from social services but was told that there wasn't much they could offer. There was a vague suggestion that if they could get the disability team involved we might qualify for respite. I heard nothing more so asked our family worker to chase it up. Seemingly the social worker has now left so we asked for another social worker to come out, Thursday just gone. She chatted with me, said there wasn't much they could offer and she'd be in touch. So she rang on Friday to tell me she's discussed it with her manager and it's now a child protection issue. I spoke to the manager who says that as my kids won't wash (they do, but they need help), or eat (they do but have sensory issues which make it tricky), or see anyone (they do, but both have extreme social anxiety and hate meeting new people), it's now reached the threshold for section 47(?) and if she wants she can involve the police. I have to now make the children meet with her on Monday, and then agree to whatever she thinks best. How has it gone from "you're doing great, sorry we can't help" to "your kids are at risk of significant harm and we can involve the police"? Do I have any control or choice over what happens from here?