Or am i justified to feel this way

[Escumator]

So back ground first ;
Dh - cheated multiple time in the past. Texts from other women, slept with other women, kid with another woman, been abusive.

I made the decision to stay everytime and it feels as though he has changed. 3years later since the last incident. Hes a good dad most of the time. He works hard has 9 to 5 and does bits on the side to make more money. BUT im still unhappy. He moans at the kids, doesnt 'play' gets irrtated bytoys. Leaves a mess everywhere. Expects dinner made clothes ironed and washed every single day. Even if he is eatin seperate from me a kids im expected to make it at 9pm when he decides hes hungry. I NEVER get time to myself. I dont have friends because i dont get the opportunity to make any. He goes to the gym he goes to football he gets to do this and that the most i do is see my mum of an evening after ive put kids to bed and made him dinner.

Every one raves about how hard working he is. They dont no the bulshit. I dont no how i feel anymore. Im so bored. And fed up and depressed. but i also have bipolar. So im thinking maybe this is just part of my mental.health makin me feel.this way?

No. You're in a shit relationship and don't have any self-esteem. That's what's wrong.

Thank you for ur response. I feel like because hes been good for a fe wyears i hsve no grounds to end the relationship. We also have multiple kids together and they will be effected

Wow! He’s worked some real magic on you!

He gets to cheat, flirt with whoever he likes, create random children (is he supporting that child?), go out to work, have his hobbies, get his meals made, his children looked after, his shit picked up for him, he even gets the luxury of moaning about it all when it’s not done to his standards. And what do you get? You get to blame yourself for being upset about it. Wow.

Leave him. The cheating alone should have been enough to make you go, he is a disrespectful tear and won't change.

Everything wrong with this. Really. Everything. Think of someone who you admire and ask would they put up with this? And would you still admire them if they did?

Twat even

If your friend emailed you that, what would you say?

You don’t need grounds to end a relationship OP. Not wanting to be in it is all the reason you need.

I would advise you get yourself some counselling to work on your self esteem and assertiveness. He’s currently using you as a doormat.

I feel so alone and upset.. thank you for tour replies

LEAVE NOW!

What do YOU get from the relationship Op?

I bought some new clothes last week just a pair of jeans and a tshirt. And i just wanted a "u look nice" i made such a huge effort. Make up put earrings in straightend my hair. And he said "thats a nice top".... that sounds pathetic im gettin worked up over that doesnt it?

Please don't waste the rest of your life on this disgusting piece of shit. You and your children deserve better.

Your mental health will improve once you are shot of him, I guarantee it and you'll be strong enough to deal with what comes.

Unreasonable behaviour. You could get a divorce on those grounds. Astonished that you've put up with it this long!

Sounds like he has convinced you that he's doing you a favour by staying with you. You are worth so much more. Get dressed up for you. Not for someone who doesn't deserve you.

Op you will get more time to yourself without him- when he has the dc's.

What is he bringing to your relationship?
Apart from money ( assuming you have access to? ) - nothing but grief and work for you.

I get that you have wanted to try and make it work and you have certainly tried.
He's a selfish prick.

You are worth more than this but only you can make the changes to enable this.
Good luck, you will be so much happier on your own

Were not married. The house is council, in my name. Cant put his name on it coz he got a mortgage for his mum. But i dont claim anything out of fear of loosing my home.. so it would be easy to leave in tjat sense. But i feel like i havnt got a good reason to.say to him 'im leaving u'

Don’t spend your life scraping around for a half assed compliment from this disgusting cheat. His compliments aren’t worth what you need them to be.

You don’t need a good reason. You tell him the relationship is over and he is leaving. If he refuses to leave you call the police. His name isn’t on the tenancy so he has no right to be there once you remove his permission to be there.

You don't need a "reason" love.
You don't have to justify your decision to him or anyone else.

If this is what you want- you tell him.

This isn't a court of law, it's your life.
He doesn't own you and if you're so unhappy and see no way forward then you're only delaying the start of your new, happier life.

You owe him nothing. At all.

This will be hard there is no doubt about that but you can do it.

But what about the last couple years hes been working payin the bills etc?

Paying the bills for his family? Yes, that’s what you do when you are an adult with a house and family. That doesn’t entitle him to a relationship with you!

You owe him nothing and you don't need a reason to end it beyond "I want to end it."

You deserve more. I know you don't believe it right now, but you really do.

The house is in your name. Go to CAB for some advice on how to legally get shot of him. Do you have any kind of support network? Friends or family who will help you through this?

What does that mean op?

He's been benefiting from working and paying the bills by living there and being waited on hand and foot.

This doesn't give him the right to a lifelong tenancy in the home and a lifelong relationship with you.

Meant in the nicest possible way- you seem to have your lines blurred op.
Just because he has provided for you does not mean you have to put up with him if you are unhappy. Honestly it doesn't.