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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to think my friend is a bit cheeky?

74 replies

marie0675 · 08/08/2018 14:48

My friend text asking to borrow my suitcase for a mini break.
I said yes.
She's text saying she wants to come today for it ..I said ok il hurry back from town to be in.
I ask her if she will pop to the cake shop (2 doors from her) and bring me a cake over £3 max and il give her the cash.
She says no sorry can't,got the two boys with me and they will want one,will cost too much.
Will do it another time.
Yet I've just rushed back to be in for her.

OP posts:
overmydeadbody · 08/08/2018 14:51

It's your choice to do yes or no to her requests her choice to do the same.

It's a boy annoying for you but she knows her boys and how they will act.

MorningsEleven · 08/08/2018 14:53

I think a cake is the least she could do.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue · 08/08/2018 14:53

She could manage their expectations and tell them in advance they won't be getting a cake from the shop but tbh I'd avoid taking my 2 in a bakery if i wasn't planning to get them something as the whining and tantrums annoy me!

PinkHeart5914 · 08/08/2018 14:55

She’s the adult so can surely say no to her children and explain she’s only getting you a cake as your helping Mummy out etc

Yes it’s a bit tight of her if you ask me

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 08/08/2018 14:55

Definitely cheeky! I fail to see why she can’t repay the favour. “No boys, this cake is for Marie as she’s lending me her suitcase” easy

shoofly · 08/08/2018 14:57

She is cheeky, I can totally understand the not wanting to have to deal with a tantrum but as you're also doing her a favour she should suck it up

LuluBellaBlue · 08/08/2018 14:57

I’d say sorry I’ll be delayed getting home whilst I go via a cake shop Grin

PorkFlute · 08/08/2018 14:57

When she tries to arrange to collect it again tell her you won’t be in because you need to go to the bakery 😂

elizzza · 08/08/2018 14:58

I think her explanation is reasonable, she doesn’t want to take two kids into a cake shop and have them ask for cake or sulk if she says no. It’s not like you asked for an essential item - if you’d asked her to pick up a pint of milk or something then okay but you can probably cope for the afternoon without cake.

It sort of depends on the circumstances on you “rushing back” - it seems like it was an inconvenience for you to be home at the time she suggested, but did you tell her that and ask her to come later, or did you rush home of your own accord? It’s a bit unreasonable to feel put out unless she actually asked you to rush back.

eddiemairswife · 08/08/2018 15:01

Does she never say,"No", to her children?

PositiveVibez · 08/08/2018 15:02

I’d say sorry I’ll be delayed getting home whilst I go via a cake shop

This

But you've also made it sound a bit, you can lend my case if you bring me a cake. Also, she is coming to you to get it and not asked you to take it to her.

If I really wanted a cake, I'd take case to hers and pick one up.

letsdolunch321 · 08/08/2018 15:03

I would conventionally not be able to find the holdall - cheeky bitch !!!

Original poster
marie0675 · 08/08/2018 15:03

I'm forever doing her favours
Not once has she did me a favour
I rushed home as this was the only time she could get over.
I wouldn't be driving 25 mins to hers to drop it off

OP posts:
December2018 · 08/08/2018 15:08

It probably would have been more expensive if she had to buy her own suitcase wouldn't it??

AliceRR · 08/08/2018 15:10

Yes she could have got you a cake and just told her children “no” or bought them a cake! Presumably she has asked to borrow your case as it is cheaper and more convenient for her than buying one.

QueenoftheSilverDollar12 · 08/08/2018 15:11

That is cheeky in the extreme. Does she need lessons on how to say no to her kids? I've heard it all now....🙄
I'd not be rushing back anywhere and would love to tell her where to stick the luggage!

chocatoo · 08/08/2018 15:12

V cheeky. I wouldn’t rush.

9amTrain · 08/08/2018 15:13

Don't let her treat you like a pushover then!

WhatchaMaCalllit · 08/08/2018 15:14

marie0675 - I rushed home as this was the only time she could get over. I seriously doubt that.
Also, it's a suitcase. She could buy herself one. If it gets damaged while she is on her mini break (e.g. a wheel comes off or something), is she going to replace it?
Not once has she did me a favour - that doesn't surprise me. There are givers and there are takers and based on your posts about this 'friend', they seem like a taker, especially based on this I'm forever doing her favours.

I'd actually contact her, phone her if necessary, and say that you can't find the suitcase and you're sorry for dragging her over to your place unnecessarily. You remember where you got it and would recommend that she go there to get one for herself.

AnneLovesGilbert · 08/08/2018 15:14

It probably would have been more expensive if she had to buy her own suitcase wouldn't it?? Indeed. And no one's forcing her to go on a "mini break"

(can only ever hear that in Bridget Jones' voice Grin)

Jeffers3 · 08/08/2018 15:15

This doesn’t really make a difference but was the cake for the two of you to have tea and cake when she came over to pick up the case?

Nikephorus · 08/08/2018 15:16

I'd actually contact her, phone her if necessary, and say that you can't find the suitcase and you're sorry for dragging her over to your place unnecessarily.
This ^^. She's a CF.

Pengggwn · 08/08/2018 15:18

I'd say, "In that case (boom boom) I won't be able to be home for you to collect it, as I have to go to town."

LeftRightCentre · 08/08/2018 15:19

I wouldn't have loaned her my suitcases to begin with. Fuck that. Mine are really nice ones I had to save up to buy. I travel a lot and use all my cases regularly. I've loaned them to my daughter but I can trust her to use them well and not damage them.

Just tell her the deal's off if she's a taker. She can buy her own cases. Stop being a walkover.

DarlingNikita · 08/08/2018 15:21

She's a cheeky mare and she needs to take responsibility for her own kids and their pestering.

"In that case (boom boom) I won't be able to be home for you to collect it, as I have to go to town."

This exactly.

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