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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour

63 replies

Column · 05/08/2018 22:12

Hi, this is a difficult one for me to write, but I'm asking for help out of desperation.

The man next door is driving me absolutely mad. He is about 6o years old and was already living there when I moved in. The best way I can describe him is that he is a hoarder/loner. I also think he may have mental health problems.

The house was scruffy when I first moved here but not bad enough to put me off buying. The garden was the same, with bits of old furniture laying around. However 20 years down the line the house is falling down around him and the garden is a jungle. The house is mainly covered by foliage from trees and shrubs and is barely visible now.

He's always been friendly enough over the years but tends very much to keep himself to himself. He'll say hello if he really has to but will quickly dart off to avoid any further conversation. He doesn't speak to any other neighbours at all.

We both have detached properties (luckily). What has been happening though over the past couple of years is that I've noticed that every single day, starting about 5.30 am right throughout the day until gone midnight he is pouring bucket after bucket of liquid, (I assume it's water but don't really know), down his outside drain at the side of his property. (I don't know if he has any other outside drains, it's impossible to see). He must throw it down with such force as the noise is so loud.

The reason this is getting to me is the fact that this drain is located right next to my bedroom window (bungalow). I am not well at the moment and have been spending a lot of time in bed recently which is another reason I am getting annoyed. Yesterday, I decided to count how many times he poured liquid down the drain. In the space of two hours and 20 minutes he poured over 100 buckets down it. This literally goes on all day long with only maybe, a couple of hours break.

A few times I have heard him over the years trying to unblock the main sewer pipe with rods or something. I'm starting to now wonder if he has a problem with his plumbing indoors. I have noticed a bad intermittent smell coming from his property over the years. I might be wrong but it smells like manure. However, since this really hot weather the smell has increased and I'm now wondering if he has a working toilet. Whenever I've sat out in my back garden over the last few weeks the smell has at times been so strong and so unpleasant I've nearly vomited and had to go indoors to escape it.

What can I do? I don't want to cause this man any more problems than he already has but the smell and the non-stop noise with his drain are making me more ill than I already am. Who can I report this to, if anyone? Thank you.

OP posts:
waxy1 · 05/08/2018 22:16

This reply has been deleted

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Sparklesocks · 05/08/2018 22:27

Oh that’s awful OP, I can see your dilemma.
Is it possible this man is vulnerable? If there are bad smells etc along with the buckets your plumbing theory is probably correct.
Does he tend to have any visitors? Family, friends or carers or someone you can maybe mention your concerns to?

Or Would you feel comfortable striking up a casual chat with him? You’ve been neighbors for years so he might be comfortable confiding in you. You could ask how he is, maybe mention you’ve noticed the buckets, and ask if he needs any help with anything?

If not, does your council have a vulnerable adults team you could get in touch with? He might need some help with social services.

PatrickTheStarfish · 05/08/2018 22:30

Waxy 😂😂 Wtf? 😂

Singlenotsingle · 05/08/2018 22:35

Report it to the Council as a health hazard. Certainly if the smell's that bad, it could really be a health hazard, and I'd be quite worried.

Original poster
Column · 05/08/2018 22:35

I've tried so many times over the years to speak to him but unfortunately he can turn a bit nasty. He will literally walk away if you try to say anything to him so I just say hello and that's it. He doesn't want to know.

I've never seen anyone visit his house apart from the postman.

OP posts:
UrsulaPandress · 05/08/2018 22:39

I think waxy is remembering Dennis Nilsen.

Disquieted1 · 05/08/2018 22:42

I guess he has a commode (it's surprisingly common) and empties it down the drain and tries to flush it through. I don't understand why he can't empty it down the loo but there could be perfectly valid reasons.

On a practical level, maybe there are some chemicals that can be flushed down to neutralise the smell?

Troels · 05/08/2018 22:47

If the house is falling apart, maybe the plumbing is shot too. He's using a commode and tipping it in the drain and then trying to wash away the smell using loads of water. He's starting so early hoping no one is around to notice. Call enviromental health, that is a proper health hazard.

LighthouseSouth · 05/08/2018 22:47

I'd report to the Council and say there's a smell coming from the drains.

or it might be the water company?

thing is, even if he is using a commode and emptying it outside, I feel like there must be something wrong with the drains for there to be a smell?

also, just a possiblity - we are having major issues with drain smells round here and the council have said it's the lack of rain and that nothing is moving along normally in drain terms....so could that be a factor in the smell?

KeepServingTheDrinks · 05/08/2018 22:59

If you were in the uk,I'd say environmental health for the smell and adult SS for the possible MH issues. If you're not in the uk, I have no advice, sorry

Original poster
Column · 05/08/2018 23:10

I don't know if he's using a commode and emptying it into the drain. If the toilet was working okay I don't know why he wouldn't just use the toilet. Isn't a commode used when you have mobility problems or am I wrong about that? He certainly has absolutely no mobility problems at all. All I know is the stress of listening to the liquid going into the drain is making me ill. It is unbearably loud and simply non-stop. He's still outside now doing it, one bucket after another.

I will definitely ring the council in the morning. My patience is really wearing thin now.

OP posts:
LighthouseSouth · 05/08/2018 23:15

yes, call the council

what you could also do is say that there's a smell and you can hear "someone" pouring or throwing literally dozens of buckets of liquid at 5.30am. So don't mention the neighbour. I have a feeling this might get them out faster! Also they can legitimately then knock on his door and say with innocent faces "have you heard this or smelt a dodgy smell" etc.

Original poster
Column · 05/08/2018 23:19

Sorry to ask, but where would he do a poo? Surely he wouldn't be disposing of that down the small drain?

OP posts:
SpottingTheZebras · 05/08/2018 23:20

He’s murdering rent boys and having trouble getting their heads to go down the drain.

Something along these lines was the first thing I thought of as well!

OP, it could be that he has a commode because he is incontinent rather than having any mobility reasons. I would find this situation really annoying as well, so I hope the council can help. Can you report a general problem with the smell of the drains to your water company as well, and see if they can give any advice or come out to have a look?

Original poster
Column · 05/08/2018 23:24

I will add water company to my list of people to ring.

You may be right, maybe he is incontinent, I don't know.

OP posts:
LighthouseSouth · 05/08/2018 23:24

OP yes he might be disposing of that down a small drain, hence the buckets and buckets of water

do you think he might be feeling unable to let a plumber into his house?

this is another reason I think play "innocent face" with the council - they will do any referrals needed and he won't think it was about you, just that you reported a smell.

Original poster
Column · 05/08/2018 23:29

He definitely won't let anybody in his house, maybe out of shame or embarrassment. He won't even let the meter readers in.

OP posts:
PositivelyPERF · 05/08/2018 23:32

It sounds like there are a couple of issues, with plumbing. Blocked toilet would explain the smell and the bucket could be as a result of a leaking pipe.

LighthouseSouth · 05/08/2018 23:37

right, I reckon that's it

no plumbing working in his house so he's getting rid of it all as you hear.

MrsEricBana · 05/08/2018 23:45

Oh my goodness, poor you and poor him too. That's no way for either off you to live. I'm not sure - maybe phone the environmental health dept and ask. Hope you resolve it soon.

MrsEricBana · 05/08/2018 23:45

Of

Tutulafromage · 05/08/2018 23:47

Ring environmental health at the local council....

UpstartCrow · 05/08/2018 23:49

Environmental health and adult social services might be able to do something.

Poppyinagreenfield · 05/08/2018 23:49

It is also a matter for the water authority if he is disposing of foul sewage into the storm water. They would be my first contact. Then environmental health. The first thing the authorities will do is check the drain and sewer arrangements around the property. To gain access they may involve the police. It needs raising for his own well being.

Hawkmoth · 05/08/2018 23:50

IF you don't get anywhere with the agencies mentioned previously, you can advise the fire brigade of a potential fire hazard. Their referrals to social services may carry more weight.