To hate people who joke about being ‘a little bit OCD’

[TeamB1]

Just that really.
My other half has OCD. It is not a joke and governs every part of our lives. It’s not just checks- it’s the intrusive thoughts and compulsions and it’s very very damaging.

People who joke or (even worse) boast about OCD if they like things very clean have absolutely no idea what extra damage they do. OCD is a very misunderstood condition.

I agree serendipity.

People use language in all sorts of ways. Sorry OP but that’s the way the world wags.

While I’m sorry you’re life is affected so badly by your DP’s MH issues, you are not the word police, and ABU to suggest people tiptoe around because you are sensitive to something they say.

Fwiw I was depressed, and know that I feel different now, but still say “I was so depressed about X”, knowing that I feel nothing like I felt when I was clinically depressed.

May I suggest you get more support? You do sound like you’re struggling. 💐

I have OCD and have no job, no friends, have never had a partner and live in almost complete isolation because of it.

I don't have the heart or stomach to even begin describing the complexities of my rituals or nature of my thoughts. I've had symptoms of it since I was four or five, was diagnosed at 18, forced to drop out of university three times between 19 and 24, had to stop working at 25, moved into supported accommodation at 27 and now at 38 I am on the waiting list to go onto a specialist ward hundreds of miles from where I live in a last-ditch attempt to reduce the limitations it has on me. Therapy and medication as provided by local services have done nothing to help me, and it has only become more complex and disabling as time has passed and it has become interwoven with several other mental illnesses that I have.

To the PP who suggested that people misappropriating the term would boost awareness and therefore be a good thing: OCD comes on a spectrum of severity and most people do not have it as badly as I do (some have it worse; I'm under no illusions there), but anyone who meets the criteria for diagnosis by a psychiatrist suffers badly to some extent. Using the label to describe quirks and perfectionism reduces understanding of the condition to pretty much zero and does damage to people like me.

OP, YANBU.

YANBU, in my opinion. I don't know very much about it, I have read about it and watched a programme a while back about people who are diagnosed with OCD, and it broke my heart. It must be so difficult. I hate to see anyone belittle something that must be so hard to deal with.

On a similar, though unrelated note...'oh it's the Alzheimer's, haha, I'm so funny'... We have a lovely family friend, elderly now, diagnosed with Alzheimer's about ten years ago. I want to scream when I hear people make little of a horrible condition. He doesn't know his own family. Such a lovely man, always interested in everyone and everything.

Apologies OP, don't mean to derail.

People can experience a depressed mood because their football team lost, for example. It would be baffling and offensive if, for the duration of that probably very brief downturn, they claimed to be suffering from depression.

Suggesting that a person has OCD just because they like having their computer keyboard lined up exactly with the edge of their desk, or love dusting and hoovering, is incorrect and insulting. As another poster said, how can you be a little bit Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? It doesn't even make sense. If people are using language in such a way that it loses its meaning, they need pulling up on it.

You hate people who joke about it? Really?

What extra damage do these people do? It takes nothing away from anyone who really suffers with OCD.

Ginny I can barely even begin to say how offensive, ignorant and cruel your post is.

I've had OCD I now know most of my life. It's a very secretive, hidden disease because it's fucking embarrassing.

For me it affects -

How I move in bed
Getting out of bed
Brushing my teeth
Going to the toilet
How I wash dishes
How I prepare and store food
If and How I answer the phone
If and How I answer the door
How I get dressed
Where and how I sit or stand in my own home
If and how I do ALL my chores
If and how I deal with my budget
Taking medication
How I bathe including what products I use

I get through 8 cans of disinfectant, 2 bottles of bath cleaner, 2 bottles of kitchen cleaner, 2 rolls of kitchen roll, 1 large shampoo, 1 large shower gel, 2 cans deodorant, half tube of toothpaste, half bottle of mouthwash, 1 bottle of laundry detergent - every week! And that's less than I used to!

That's me 'doing well' I've tried numerous anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, cbt several times, years of psychotherapy, mindfulness, hypnotherapy, exposure response... None has worked.

I'm on my 5th bout of full agoraphobia triggered by the OCD I haven't left my home in nearly 8 months.

I've had friends, family, strangers & mh professionals tell me I'm not trying hard enough! That they've read/seen various celebrities who claim to have OCD say that X treatment works for everyone with OCD, that 'everyone has it a bit'.

Words have meaning. Ignorant thoughtless people saying 'I'm a little bit ocd' makes it HARDER for those of us GENUINELY suffering to be taken seriously and get the help and support we NEED. Please don't do it and don't defend those that do.

littlefear It takes away the reality of the condition. People don't generally 'joke' about cancer, or MS, or schizophrenia. Because they know it's a horrible, serious thing to have.

OCD is no different, and joking about it is demeaning to the people whose lives are devastated by it...and yes I do mean devastated. Sure there is likely a spectrum of disorder, but anyone who has been formally diagnosed and in treatment, is suffering.

Somehow joking about a disorder that is utterly debilitating, and causes immense suffering, ..well not funny really is it? And the 'little bit OCD ' people need to shut up!

centerparcs ty ty ty ty. I've always been really fucking irritated that people don't know how stupid they sound when they say 'I'm a little bit obsessive compulsive disorder' er no, you're a little wanker.

I could write a long post about my own experience of OCD as a teenager and how utterly debilitating and isolating it is, but previous posters have expressed it all much more effectively than I ever could.

People who trivialise the condition by referring to themselves or others as being a bit OCD are simply ignorant. Even if there is a sliding scale of severity, this does not excuse what is essentially mocking and minimising a serious mental health issue.

YANBU.

YANBU, but I do think it usually comes from a place of ignorance rather than malice. Better education is needed so that people who don’t suffer from it realise how difficult it is.

As someone whose OCD nearly killed them, I really am struggling to find offence
Obviously this turn of phrase is annoying because “I’m a little bit obsessive compulsive disorder” doesn’t really make grammatical sense. You can have mild to moderate OCD but you are not actually your diagnosis.

I do think people with OCD can be well or be having better or worse days.
I have OCD, and at one point in my life I was checking things in my home and outside over 140 times a night. I used to get up and walk past our local homeless community to make sure none of them had died in the night, I used to make sure things were off (like the dodgy white goods my dad got from “a mate”) or walk past my car dozens of times to make sure no one had nicked it.
My intrusive thoughts nearly killed me.
I was medicated for this.
I went on to have a series of other MH issues and was also medicated for these.
In the last six months I have slowly withdrawn my medication and am the most well I have ever been in my whole life.

I still check, but no more than half a dozen times a day (on average v occasionally worse)
I don’t live in 24/7 fear anymore (again can have bad days)

I still have OCD, but it’s very well managed and not very severe.
Maybe it’s people like this as a PP suggested who describe themselves as a little OCD?

I

What irritates me is it's invariably women who say this. What they mean is 'I'm a proper woman because I'm very tidy'.

I think I understand what nomudnolotus is saying by a 'little bit of' though. There are certain little things that I am compelled to do/do things in a certain order, and if I don't do them I am unsettled and do go back to do it correctly. (Have just reread the post and realised how important it is to me that these things are done in a certain way, as I referred to them as having to be done correctly, rather than 'correctly'! Semantics, but revealing!) It's just little behavioral things and not the usual well documented counting/hand washing etc. Yet fits the description of causing distress or anxiety if not carried out. So is this mild (ie a little bit of) OCD? Or is it only OCD if it causes significant disruption to your life, which is being implied in some posts here.

I dunno. It's just a turn of phrase. I have awful ocd but it doesn't bother me. I think you're being a bit sensitive.

I think you're being unreasonable. Especially to hate the actual people as opposed to the shift in language - and that's what language does. It changes. According to a couple of definitions of OCD, I think that intrusive thoughts causing distressing feelings can easily be applicable to many people.

I am bi-polar. Diagnosed. Have been medicated before. I couldn't care less if someone calls themselves 'a bit depressed'. It doesn't have any effect on me whatsoever.

I think you're looking for something or someone to be angry at. It gives you some kind of control. Perhaps because you feel unable to help your husband and his OCD.

@headinhands

Really? The feminism board is over there ---->>>>

That's where you'll get a chorus of "patriarchy innit" however irrelevant your 'poor women' comments are.

I’m sorry you have this condition Graphista.

I still assert that the OP isn’t the word police and has no rights whatsoever to order people not to use certain words. As I said I have had clinical depression and know it it a totally different feeling to feeling a bit miffed or down about something and saying “im so depressed about whatever” but I still say it, even though I know I’m not clinically depressed anymore.

We don’t live in a Stalinist state. We have free speech (still)

I understand you may be feeling sensitive about your condition, but it’s not my fault you have it, the same way it wasn’t your fault I was depressed... I still had to deal with it, and wouldn’t have minded in the least if someone nearby had piped up that they were “so depressed about Y or whatever.”

I don’t own any words, people can say whatever they like in my book, and use any words they choose. I’m sorry you’ve latched onto me as being the big ol’ baddie on this thread graphista. I have an opinion that differs from yours. No need to call my posts offensive ignorant and cruel just because I have a different opinion to you.

Others with your condition share my opinion. I’m sure others who have shared a diagnosis of clinical depression share my opinion about free speech too.

It’s just a turn of phrase. I think the op needs support.

So, do you hate when people say they are depressed? Mad about something? Crazy for chocolate? That they think that coworker is a psychopath? Can someone say they’re exhausted if they haven’t been admitted to hospital?

People exaggerate. No one says this stuff to upset you personally. You are being unreasonable.

I have been diagnosed with ocd and would say i don't think I have it that bad. I was shocked when they told me what it was as I had always thought it was to do with cleaning.

Mine revolves around obsessive thoughts about death and a fear of it. As well as struggling with my children when out as i cant control their actions and can't cope with them not behaving all the time (they aren't even badly behaved but I just get very focused on the fact they might play up).

I do think that whilst i dont have OCD i certainly have ocd like issues. I have anxiety and apparently bpd (i dont think i do). I get intrusive thoughts and belief that if i dont do things in certain ways then somethibg bad will happen. My house is a pig sty!

I agree with the OP that people using this term to boast etc are totally out of order however i do believe that OCD doesnt necessarily follow rigid patterns of behaviour either.

I have mild OCD - my 'thing' about cleanliness and order isn't part of that, it's part of my autism. The OCD involves intrusive thoughts (which are unpleasant but bearable because I can just tell myself it's OCD and I'm not really thinking it at all) and a whole issue around security & safety (to the extent that I struggle going out but that's likely also tied in with the autism & anxiety). Before I go to bed I have to do the whole routine of checking that knobs are turned off on the cooker, switches are all off even though they've not been on since the last time, doors are all locked (that circuit is multiple times). I know when I'm really struggling because I'm dreaming of windows & doors not being secure and that's not a nice dream to have. It's crap and it affects my life but compared to a lot of people it is basically 'a bit OCD' (though more correctly 'a bit of OCD' or 'mild'). For all you know some of the people saying they're 'a bit OCD' do actually have it but are embarrassed about saying anything and therefore joke about it. I joke about my autistic flapping.... Better to give them the benefit of the doubt.

I don't use the phrase as I understand some people don't like it and it's not exactly hard not to use it.

However, I also don't agree with the following statement made by an earlier poster

Ignorant thoughtless people saying 'I'm a little bit ocd' makes it HARDER for those of us GENUINELY suffering to be taken seriously and get the help and support we NEED

I don't think it's true. People use 'I'm a little OCD' in the same way they use 'I'm crazy' or 'She's delusional' or 'He must be blind'

I think most people are fully aware that a diagnosis of OCD means something very different and much more serious than what someone means when they say 'joke' about being a little OCD. I don't see that people would actually be confused.

It's an annoying phrase and I wouldn't use it myself but I don't find it offensive.

The worse ones are where people seem to think it's a badge of honour because their so clean...

Op I think dh mum has it and it's ruined his childhood which is why I can't bear it when people get up right about their possessions... And cleanliness.

Really? The feminism board is over there ---->>>>
*
That's where you'll get a chorus of "patriarchy innit" however irrelevant your 'poor women' comments are.*

Oh for gods sake. I'm just saying it how I see outside and away from all the trans feminism blah blah yawn blah.

It took me 20 minutes to check the kitchen and lock the front door this morning. Then went back to check again. That was a good morning for me. I haven't been assessed and it doesn't affect my life that much but I would say I am on the spectrum of OCD. I also have obtrusive thoughts that if I don't straighten something, drink out of a certain glass, always take the left turn when going around something. Again, it doesn't massively affect my life but I know it isn't normal behaviour.