People you had a sixth sense about and were right

[HarryPotterISreal]

I’ve just been reading one of the spooky threads here and a poster talked about someone she got a bad feeling about and some months later was arrested for abuse or something. When someone is arrested who is a ‘pillar of the community’ someone always says ‘I never liked him, I could always tell’.

Do you have a story where you genuinely knew someone was bad news, though everyone else thought they were wonderful? How could you tell and did others eventually see their true colours?

To add to the list of "opposite effects", I have a couple of "never saw that coming" incidents, both with boyfriends of friends who I thought were nice guys. One I had tabbed as the "gentle giant" type turned out to be violent towards my friend. The other one seemed an okay bloke - now serving life for murdering a male prostitute.

Ian Huntley when he appeared on the news giving an interview about the missing girls.

I immediately told my husband "he did it". I was right.

When I was about 10 or 11 my younger sister had a party with a children's entertainer. I hated him immediately. He seemed to get on well with my parents and my mum on the PTA booked him for the school Christmas party.
A few weeks later he called my parents and said he had free tickets to a local theme park and did we want to go with him. I insisted I wouldn't go unless my dad came, which he reluctantly did.
A few weeks after that he asked to take us to the cinema. I refused and we didn't go. The following year he was arrested for sexual offences against children who he groomed over several years. He went to prison for a long time, in fact he died in prison. I am so glad I trusted my instinct as a child and always have ever since.

I wrote these on the presence of evil thread under my old name, but it seems appropriate to put them here too:

My grandmother was friends with an elderly vicar (such a cliche, I know!) who was very odd. Maybe its just that he was socially awkward, I don't know. But certainly something in his eyes, the way he looked at people, made me very uncomfortable as a child. He would sort of leer, look at people sideways, I always felt like he was constantly side-eyeing me. There is absolutely no suggestion that he ever did anything he shouldn't have, but I was on high alert around him. I made sure I was never in a room alone with him.

Another time when I was much younger and still lived at home my mum and I were driving home one evening in the winter, about 6pm, pitch black, rural. We were just pulling into our drive when a young man came out the shadows. Early twenties I would say. I jumped out my skin and mum put the central locking on and lowered the window a crack. He jumped into action and gave us an odd, but friendly-ish spiel about being the local village milkman going door to door looking for customers hmm
My mum said oh ok give me a leaflet and I'll have a think. He said he hadn't got any, but if we went into the house he would tell us all about what he offered. The conversation went on, and he was insistent about going into the house, and gave us some information about the milk deliveries, telling us that he delivered every day. My mum made it very clear that we would not be going into the house and he went on his way. I was frozen with fear throughout the short conversation.

Several weeks later my mum and I were talking to a neighbour about the milkman. My mum says oh yes he delivers every day doesn't he? Neighbour says oh no dear, three times a week, it's always been that way shock

Whatever that 'milkman' was or wasn't trying to do that night on our drive, my mum's spider senses about almost certainly saved us from something.

Thirty years ago a guy joined our office. Didn't like him, couldn't place it. He ended up doing time for fraud.
Like others though, totally misjudged the paedophile in a hobby group I took dh to, weekly. Not a clue, and as pp said, that's scary.

Met a group of women after having first child.

Newbie came along, I instantly disliked her but everyone else loved her, she was just too nice to be true.
Found out from another Mum that this woman lives with a convicted child rapist, he is the father of her kids. Having met him briefly before I knew he gave me the creeps. Definitely something not right about him.

I am a really good judge of character, and as a pp said, it’s a survival thing.

Not quite what you're looking for but Jimmy Saville. As a child in the 70s and 80s, Jim'll Fix It was on every week in my house as my siblings liked it.

I remember clearly, being HORRIFIED by him. The sight of him and the way he spoke to the children. I remember him talking in a really nasty, bossy way to a little boy who was looking close to tears....sort of telling him off for not being happy to be there.

That memory stayed with me as I empathised with the boy. Then when it all came out I thought "God...I knew he was a bad person" but didn't know why.

I get it now and again. I've always had good instincts and generally follow them.

The first time was apparently as a toddler. There was a colleague of my dads who was very handsome and charming but my mum says that I wouldn't stay in the same room as him and if I was made to, I would press my body against my mum so she couldn't see or speak to him. I refused to look or speak to him. I was otherwise a very placid easy going child, so it was very out of character and my mother was both bemused and embarrassed by my weird behaviour. He was arrested a few years later on child abuse charges.

My mum couldn't believe that I had clocked him whilst everybody else was duped. I only have a vague memory of it, but I remember the feeling that I got, it's like being able to feel the vibration of the real them underneath the facade and it's jarring. Mercifully it doesn't happen often, but no, I've never been wrong when I have had a violent reaction to someone like that

Can't explain how or why but I hated my parents new neighbour when he moved in a few years ago. He was really friendly and helpful and kind. They liked him a lot. He didn't do anything to offend me or anything bad I could pinpoint. But I always told my mum to keep the kids away from him. Found out a few months ago he was a convicted paedo who had been to jail and was under some kind of order, which he'd broken by befriending another neighbour with young kids. So was rearrested and is now not allowed back. Makes me shudder that he was anywhere near my dc. I just knew he was bad.

My dad used to turn off the telly every time JS came on. I won’t repeat the words he used but “child abuser” would be appropriate language I think. This was in the mid 70s. I remember asking him if I could write to Jim’ll Fix It and his response was absolute horror and a very firm no.

Couple friend of the family, the husband was decades older than his wife and always struck me as very touchy and "nice" in a fatherly way, but also made it a point to slightly bring up sex or his virility in most conversations....not too overtly but just enough for you to think...hmm. One night when he was over we were talking about the #metoo movement and Cosby and he started railing against all of these women coming out of the woodwork and accusing men of abuse when they were perfectly happy to use sex to further their careers. Both my DH and I were aghast at his comments, it was quite a misogynistic rant.

Later find out he is in trouble with the law as he has committed indecent acts against his underage step-daughter. :(

@DickTERFin

it’s like being able to feel the vibration of the real them underneath the facade and it's jarring.

Yes, that’s a very accurate description of feeling ‘danger’ signals in my experience.

Three of the men involved in the Rochdale grooming case, as depicted in the BBC drama “Three girls”.

One of them at I’d have described as a really nice man before what came out about him, I’d never have expected it. One of them though was a weirdo who used to ask my younger (19 though) sister for her phone number when she used to get in his taxi.

The girl who was portrayed as Amber actually lives on my parents street with her children.

Not quite what you're looking for but Jimmy Saville. As a child in the 70s and 80s, Jim'll Fix It was on every week in my house as my siblings liked it.

I remember clearly, being HORRIFIED by him. The sight of him and the way he spoke to the children. I remember him talking in a really nasty, bossy way to a little boy who was looking close to tears....sort of telling him off for not being happy to be there.

Agree about Saville - he was very unkind to children and you could see that many of them weren't comfortable with him It didn't surprise me at all when he was revealed as a predatory paedophile.

Otherwise, I'm afraid that I have no sixth sense at all - but I am very suspicious of almost all men due to early abuse. Sadly I tar the good ones with the same brush as the bad.

Girlandboy - me too. I knew the instant he opened his mouth he'd done it. Gave me shivers.

Yes though none as horrific as dome of the stories here.

First my ex-step father. Didn't like him from the outset but everyone else loved him. Most people took this as me not liking him just because I was young and I didn't want my Mum to remarry but I knew that wasn't it. He turned out to be a really nasty vindictive man who tried to take my mum for all she was worth when they split. She now agrees with me she should have listened to me!

Second was a colleague of DH's who I briefly met in the pub literally one time. She was quite new and again everyone else really liked her from the outset but as soon as she called me "babe" I was unimpressed. DH actually told me off for being cold towards her. After a month or so she'd pissed off most members of their team and left not long after as she wasn't "settled" aka no one liked her.

I don't think I have some kind of sixth sense though just that I was right about those specific petiole. I'm sure most of this is confirmation bias ie we remember the ones we were right about but not the ones we were initially suspicious of who turned out to be totally fine/normal!

Ian Huntley when he appeared on the news giving an interview about the missing girls.

I immediately told my husband "he did it". I was right.

Me too!

I met a guy through work, we went for a drink together to celebrate a case we both worked on and by the end of the night I started feeling really uncomfortable and unsure of him, I text my best friend and told her where I was etc and that I was going home as I was so worried..the next day he acted as though we were going to be married in the future, told me he loved me and my daughter (he had never met her) demanded I deleted all male contacts from my phone as I only needed him etc.
He totally freaked me out with his messages and I blocked him, he called me at work, emailed me to tell me how I was full of myself and thought I was better than him. He then turned up at my house (no idea how he got my address) crying and went apeshit at how I’d treated him and I’d never find anyone better.
I was terrified and called the police who cautioned him, he soon moved away but sent me a huge big email about how I was so full of myself and he loved me and my daughter like nobody else ever would..
Absolute weirdo and I knew it!

As a child I couldn’t watch JS he really grossed me out,fortunately my parents agreed
Just had a visceral reaction.his voice,demeanour,presence grossed me out
when JS came on tv parents switched it off.they hated him

When I met my BIL, he put out his hand to shake mine and I just felt utterly repelled. It was a physical reaction, and I stepped back and made a sort of "urrrghh" noise- very tactful and just the thing when you're meeting the in-laws!
Turns out my reaction was right- he is an utterly repellent person and will never be alone with my children.
I used to think that I was a very bad judge of character, but it's more that I tended to ignore my first reactions to people. I was too worried about people liking me to think for a moment about whether I liked them, or if they were safe to be around.

I know it's daft but Chris Ingham a youtuber. Always gave off a creepy vibe.

He was in the press the other day for allegedly contact young fans.

My father

Apparently I used to scream the place down even as a baby when he tried to hold me

I was right

One of the teachers at my secondary school was the most sadistic, conceited, arrogant bastard you could imagine. Corporal punishment was commonplace in schools then and this individual delighted in it with some really unpleasant ways of inflicting pain. He made it all a big laugh in class so as to cause maximum humiliation at the same time. Consequently he thought he was the absolute bees knees.

I went to a school reunion about 20 years after I left and one of the other teachers told me that this guy ‘retired early’ after allegations about his conduct towards young girls on the school bus. The allegations turned out to be not entirely without foundation but the teacher who told us about it spoke in very guarded terms. Oh how I would have liked to meet that unpleasant bastard once I was a grown man and told him exactly what I thought of him.

There are many very subtle ways in which people can give off messages about themselves. Sales people call them 'tells' and actually get trained on picking up whether someone is likely to buy a product or not, and how to give off messages that inspire confidence.

Con-artists are obviously very good at reading these messages, and appearing trustworthy. I think the same is true about those people who seem to be 'pillars of the community' but somehow you can't quite relax around them. They've (probably subconsciously learned how to blend and be acceptable, but still give off minute tells. Some of us are better at reading them than others, and that's how you get a situation where some people feel uneasy around them.

I'm a teacher and once had a colleague that I always felt like somehow he thought he was better than others, and just was a bit too smug, like he was getting away with something. He was really popular, and seemed immune to criticism, even when he didn't do his job properly. After I left that school, he suddenly disappeared. Months later the newspapers reported how his wife had found images on his laptop and reported him to the police.