Im not the bitch here am I?

[buddahbelly]

so as not to drip feed: when dp and I first got together we bought a car between us and shared it. each day for nearly 6 years I would drive him to work, go to my own then on the way home would pick him up.

I absolutely hated it but had no money to afford my own. Eventually I did and around 6 yrs ago I bought my own car outright leaving him to own the one we shared. I was fine with this, just relieved I didnt have to run around after him anymore.

Last year his terminally ill father was given a mobility car and dp was the named driver, he put his own car on the drive and would use the brand new one as it was in his words "better than his" . when his dad passed away the car was taken back, His own car is still on the driveway now. where its been since this time last year. he has made no effort to get it going again instead using mine whenever he wants.

This morning we had a row as I was getting ds ready to take him out and dp wanders in asking if he was dropping us off, I said no why would you be, err because I need the car today. this is a standard argument these days and always ends in me pointing at his car on the driveway. He has returned to full time education of his own doing, so says to pay full price for a car he wont use every day is ridiculous - I get this part. But I never asked to return to sharing my car with him.

When we did we split everything equal, insurance, repairs payments diesel, everything. Ive just forked out £300 for repairs on my car and haven't seen as much as a penny. So he left this morning on his bike in a mood with me and called me a bitch. I dont mind now and again when we've discussed it so I can make other arrangements, but dont just walk in and tell me you need my car at the drop of a hat so I & ds have to suffer.

aibu to take him off the insurance - which I may add I pay for for him!

sugarPlumFairly Please read the full thread. We both do not work. I am not arguing contributing to his vehicle. that is besides the point. he actually hasn't asked me to and if he did we would assess it.

Whoever said isn't he on summer leave then yes you are correct. he finished in May and has worked every week since. Tomorrow is his first day off (apart from weekends obviously)I don't begrudge him time off. I begrudge having to pay for my car and have him expecting he can just take it whenever he wants. even when sharing I would always check things with him if I needed it and he would do the same. there were times when as everything shared it was needed at the same time but we would take it in turns to find an alternative.

often if im heading into town I will drop him off at uni so he very rarely gets the bus, mostly on his bike or in bad weather I will pick him up.

and just to clarify the mobility stuff - his dad was on chemo & radiotherapy. thats why DP was his named driver as the hospital he needed to attend was 45 minutes away and I very much doubt fit could have driven himself when he could barely stand most days. His attitude to the mobility car has somewhat been overshadowed by a few in the place of getting his dad to and from the hospital.

what should have happened when his dad passed away and the mobility car went back was to get his car off the drive and up and running again.

what happened instead was his period of grief after just loosing his dad to cancer and him going into his shell where he has stayed ever since.

The bitch comment doesn't bother me at all.

His car will deteriorate if he just leaves it on the drive for 2 years. Tell him to put it on eBay then maybe he can afford a banger.