Unreasonable or just me finding fault

[Finnyhaddock]

I put some old photos on FB. Dh tells me has found others on old USB which I can’t see because I only have iPad. He has computer for work.
This makes me stressed because of history of him using photos in passive aggressive(lazy?) withholding.
He has made nice tea but drunk whole bottle of Malbec and can of lager
I get palpitations coz I am cross - tell him he should have said he would show them me and/or send me them
He storms off to lie on bed and then tells me he is going to bed.
Takes me ages to stop palpitations. I’m on edge

Presume he thinks I’m having another go at him
Might very well not be deliberate but still causes me stress

I need to remember this is his problem - not mine. I hate the atmosphere but feel v strongly I need to say what’s on my mind.
Aibu

I'm a bit confused what's the problem?

It doesn't sound like you are being unreasonable. You shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around your partner, its not a nice way to have to live.

Sorry, that makes absolutely no sense to me!

You are annoyed that he hasn’t let you see the photos??
He is annoyed you are annoyed and drunk too much ??

Yes ivor that’s it in a nutshell. If I say pretty much anything he thinks I’m finding fault.
On this occasion I am but he often sees it when it’s not there.
I just wondered if people thought I was BU in this situation.

He's drunk a bottle of red, what have you drunk OP?

I’ve had two glasses of Pinot Grigot! I don’t drink to excess. Why is that relevant?

How is it his fault that you can't put a usb in an ipad?

So you mean he is hogging the laptop so you can’t see them? Or they are at his workplace?
If he is actually sitting in the same house as you not letting you view the photos then the situation is of his own making.

I think you overreacted. Couldn't you have just said "can you send them to me?" Rather than waiting for an offer you knew wouldn't arise?
He is being a dick too but I think palpatations is over the top.

I certainly don’t choose palpitations. It’s an anxiety thing.
I don’t have access to the lap top.
He has history of having good cameras and not sending me the photos. I can’t decide whether it’s a passive form of control or I’m just being unreasonable.
I am sentimental about family snaps.

If I ‘just asked’ I would never get them. It would turn into a complete nag. He has done very little all weekend and could gave easily emailed them to me.

I’m confused too tbh. You’re having palpitations because he wouldn’t show you some old photos? What were the ones you put on FB, unconnected of part of all this?

Sounds like a shit relationship to be honest op.

Just checking it wasn't a drunko row.

Buy a cheap Laptop. What's your iPad paired with?

I would be wondering what's on those laptops. Porn history? Pics of other woman?

Does his phone have a password? Is her protective of it?

The ones I put on FB were family snaps. I am pretty sure there is nothing suspicious on his lap top.

Did you actually ask him to send you the photos or did you just go off in a bad mood as soon as you found out about them?

I didn’t go off in a bad mood. I stayed where I was. He knows full well I would have liked to have been sent the photos.
Is it unreasonable to think he might have done this?
Btw He has gone to bed and has no intention of sending them and I will not be demented to beg. I have done that before.
He knows I love family photos.

Not demented..demeaned although demented may be apt.

So has he actually refused to send you the photos or just hasn't done it in the timeframe you've set? Tbh if my partner demanded i sent photos to him instantly, i may well not have reacted well.

OP, you seem to be saying that he generally takes photos and doesn't bother to show them to you, is that right? And now he's done it again, and if you ask him he just won't bother to send them, but will also be annoyed if you keep asking?

whowants yes you are spot on.
It’s just bickering I know and we are probably both at fault. I wish I didn’t over react and he probably wishes the same.
I wish he had more forethought and he never has had.
Thanks for helping me to see it more clearly.

I am a bit confused here. Is English your first language OP?

So, you posted some old photos on FB of your family? DC?

Then DP says "Oh I have some nice old photos too, they are on a memory stick, but I can't be arsed to get that out and show you right now cos I am busy drinking"

Then you get palpitations and he goes to bed.

Is that correct? If so, YABU