Neighbour does not like the look of my garden - threatening to sue

[craxmum]

A new neighbour has moved in last month (we are sharing a wall in a semi-detached property). She seems to have a major issue with the way my garden looks (just paid me a visit at 7am on Sunday to inform me that she hasn't slept properly since she had a party last night and her guests were apparently "aghast"). First thing she did after moving in was decking and astroturfing her back garden fence to fence (the bits that weren't already covered in concrete).

She did mention it a couple of times before, but I never thought it bothers her that much. Now she made a vague threat of suing me for damage to her assets, as apparently her house value and enjoyment of her property is impacted. I mean, she bought it a couple of weeks ago (at the normal market value as far as I can see from the open sources), surely she made the decision with full awareness of what my garden looks like? She added a couple of personal insults (about me being foreign etc) as well.

My garden is a bit informal allotment style. We grow berries, tomatoes, courgettes, peppers, beans, herbs - stuff like that, also have a couple of dwarf fruit trees. Sunflowers all over the place at the moment. I have two small children (3 and 5), they absolutely love it and they have their own little experimentation areas. There is a bit of lawn, but with two dogs it is not in great shape - trimmed, but with some bald patches. There is an occasional weed or two, or maybe ten. Plenty of butterflies and bees. A composter (of a posh type, fully closed and maintained, not leftovers rotting in a bin). There is a water butt and sometimes watering cans / other gardening equipment lying around. I mean, it is by no means perfect, and can sometimes be messy and looks quite rustic, but I absolutely cannot see what I can do to comfort her apart from ripping all vegetation out and paving over.
AIBU?

craxmum mix the raspberries with sliced nectarines and vanilla sugar. Leave to mix for a few hours. Eat with or without clotted cream. Lush (it's a Clare McDonald recipe).

Yes, don’t fall out with neighbours unless you have to. Rasps are a great peace offering.
But how can she see your garden, isn’t there the usual latch lap fence between you.?
You could grow a tall row of runner beans next to her fence next year.

I very conveniently have a glut of raspberries, hope she's not allergic smile

Oh you poor thing! Now all I can think of is a huge raspberry pavlova!

I’m looking at a colander full of my homegrown tomatoes and contemplating a chutney making session....

Oh and I am VERY British .... my recent DNA test thingy confirmed it 😉 (was hoping for something a bit more exciting but never mind).

Some people are batshit. My mum removed her leylandii as it was blocking light from her conservatory. It was on her own side, all perfectly legal. The neighbour phoned the police on her!!!!
What's even more batshit is that the police actually turned up then stumbled over their words a bit when my step father (a Judge) asked them exactly what law had been broken.

Op some people I think deliberately want to have aggro with their neighbours. Just ignore her.

@GeorgeIII
We have three storey houses, so she can see everything from her first and second floor windows - actually I can see almost all gardens on our street too.

@scaryteacher
Thanks! I was actually running out of ideas about what to do with them (picked up this morning just before the rain).

she sounds pathetic your garden sounds real nice

Craxmum Just applying raspberries to my mouth works for me. I am jealous, as I currently live in Belgium and the raspberries here are Spanish, small and go off quickly. The blackberries here are cultivated as opposed to going brambling.

OP you are being very nice and charitable towards her, I'd have laughed hysterically in her face and told her to fuck of to fuckoffdom, and when she got there fuck off some more. But then I'm not much of a morning person I'd love to have a garden like yours, it sounds blissful! Def get chickens though

"we buy tomatoes in supermarkets here you know"

I kind of get what she is saying. I don’t agree, but I kind of understand.

You say that you are both the same race and that you are from a third world country.
To her growing your own food is a sign of being poor and not being able to afford to buy food.
To her your garden with food growing is a sign that you are a poor person and living next door to a poor person devalues her house.

Has anyone suggested a couple of cockerels yet? Goat?

She sounds absolutely nutso and all you can do is utterly ignore you - or, if she keeps at you, indicate to her that she's harassing you and you'll take preventative measures if necessarily.

Your garden sounds lovely!

Olde Traditiones, Astroterfe ynd Deckynge.

I did almost spit out my coffee at this. So funny.

Here in Florida there is a bit of a tradition of decorating your garden with pink flamingos in response to unreasonable complaints from neighbors.

Pink plastic flamingos, I should say

From your more decent updates, I would suspect that she might have been up drinking all night after the party and imagining all the wrongs done her. I’d ignore for now but be ready for future encounters.

That is the most gorgeous traditional cottage type garden, I'd love to look out onto that, definitely more than AstroTurf. You also sound like a kind, patient neighbour- she doesn't know how lucky she is.

Next time tell her "enough of this now, you're starting to sound a bit rude and snobby." Or start calling her Hyacinth or Margery.

Your garden is gorgeous and such a nice place for your children to learn and play.
Your attitude to your neighbour is very kind.
I hope she wakes up and realises how lucky she is to have next door neighbours like you.

Haven't rtft but yanbu. Pit a sofa and a fridge out that then see what she has to say! Hasn't she heard that bees and butterflies /green areas are on the decline? Perhaps you should offer to counter sue on the grounds she has a concrete/artificial jungle and is destroying the planet!

Wow! I'm speechless!!! She's a weird lunatic. Your garden sounds lovely, she'll hate our garden and my allotment. I LOVE bees and butterflies and have tons of borage growing wild.

Actually I've changed my mind after your updates: a bit of a MH situ going on here I think..

That's NOT to say you don't set clear boundaries - it's best for all concerned - but don't get upset about her inappropriate behaviour and comments.

Your garden looks lovely! I admit I have artificial grass and decking(no rats though, DH put plenty of chicken wire underneath) but through necessity rather than choice - a very small garden with a lawn that's too narrow to mow properly. I'd love a garden like yours though!

Just to wind her up, send her a copy of this article in the Daily Bigot about how having a messy garden is a sign that you are a higher class. Based on how messy my garden is I must be royalty. 😂www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3145685/How-posh-garden-patios-hanging-baskets-tidy-lawn-sign-lower-middle-class.html

I bet she'll be another one of those who can't think why her precious astroturf remains covered in slippery rotten leaves after the autumn leaf fall and starts to stink of catshit in a few months time!

She'd have a field day with mine - over the 36yrs I've been here it's evolved from a desolate bit of wasteland through various stages according to my own current abilities and now declining energy, into a tiny woodland with its own eco system and is a welcoming wildlife habitat in which I have a lot of interest. Luckily most of my neighbours during those years have been of the live and let live variety...

Your garden shows great results for all the work you've put into it, OP. Keep on doing more of the same and reaping the benefits - not just for yourself but the environment in general

Tell her it's your private property and nothing to do with her, then ignore her. If she keeps bothering you get a legal letter sent to her for harassment.

Your garden is lovely.

Astroturf is the horrible stuff.