Vomiting bugs - why are people so irresponsible? Grrr

[ohgoditshappeningagain]

Why why why do people take their children out to socialise when they have been vomiting recently?

A couple of days ago my 2yo went on a playdate with her regular babysitter, when the nanny of the other kid mentioned in passing that the kid had been vomiting the night before, (i.e. 12 hours ago) but was fine now. 48 hours later, DD starts with the d&v, and I'm bracing myself for the whole family coming down with it.

Last time this happened was at Christmas - very similar situation with another parent taking their kid out because they vomited recently but seem to feel better - and not mentioning it until our kids had already been hanging out for hours. Over the next few days my entire family including both my siblings, their kids and nanny, and my elderly parents got sick. It was total carnage, and I'm not sure I can bear this happening twice a year for the foreseeable, especially as my parents are getting older and I will have a newborn soon.

I wouldn't dream of taking a kid who'd vomited in the last 48 hours out with other children - without at least warning the other family! I thought this was just standard but clearly not?

I honestly don't get it... Do people not realise how contagious d&v bugs are? Do they just think they are not a big deal - like the common cold - and not think about the potential danger to those in contact with very young babies and elderly relatives? Do they just not care because being cooped up at home with toddlers is hell?

This drives me insane. No you are definitely not being unreasonable.
People can be so selfish.
Hope your dd is better soon and you manage to contain it

People don't know. If they did, I hope they wouldn't.

My mum wanted to take DD out on Xmas Eve with norovirus when she'd vomited that morning.

Happy Christmas. Here's some vomit.

I completely agree, it really annoys me that people are so inconsiderate and selfish. I have been quite vocal in the past about sticking to the 48 hour rule and generally people know to tell me.
The worst for us is school! Known virus but don’t send green looking poorly children home unless they’ve vomited at least once. They actually tell you to bring them in the next day if they’ve stopped being sick 🤢. A thug to keep the stats looking good. No wonder there are forever v and d bugs doing the rounds there.

This drives me Insane and it only gets worse once they’re at school ime. People will convince themselves of anything other than it being a bug ‘something they ate’ ‘too many sweets’ ‘overtired’ ‘upset’ blah blah blah just so they don’t have to face facts. People DO know they just don’t think it applies to them. It’s the same people who take kids covered in chickpox our becUse they can’t be expected to stay at home, they’ll go mad! Honest to God in case you can’t tell I have had 11 parenting years of this shit and I am over it!

Does the 48-hour rule apply generally in workplaces too? Just curious. (I'm not in the UK.)

Oh it’s so annoying.

Dd went to a birthday party when she was 2 and at the end of the party the parents said oh I’m so glad x was able to have her party, she stopped being sick this morning!

Cue about 20 kids coming down with sick bug, then their siblings.....

Another family visited us when their son was full of cold/temperature/visibly ill. I should have turned them away but I didn’t (was too polite) and poor ds got the worst cold/cough for three weeks and was sick after every feed from coughing. Spoiled our campervan trip as I had to wash bedding and blankets constantly!

I think people selfishly don't care because they're ok now. They had the sickness and they won't get it twice, sort of thing.

To be honest, I now feel quite guilty because I once took out my baby when she was “better” and I didn’t think about the 48hr thing (she’d been sick on and off for over a week, been to doctor etc). My friend’s baby caught it, then her, then her husband.
Would of course be absolutely livid if this happened to me! Luckily she was very understanding. Probably one of the less clever things I did in the first few months of parenting that I def wouldn’t do now.

It's not worth getting worked up about. Your child could just as easily catch it on a bus or in a shop.

Yes, people should not mix their DC with others when they've just been sick but even adults go to work when they've had bugs...spreading germs. And sometimes, the germs are being spread before someone even knows they're sick.

Why focus on one stupid person and waste your energy?

It does happen all the time though Ajay, that's what the OP means.

You see and hear of it all the time.

Penelope, if that's a genuine question then yes. Though adults often are sick for different reasons (pregnancy, medical side effects, alcohol poisoning, etc), which mean you have to have your common-sense head on. Personally I don't see any reason why people shouldn't give themselves 2 days automatically. Anyone with children will know this because every school advertises it. My kids school periodically send out a reminder email.

Yes! People are selfish when it comes to these things. I actually ask one friend now whether everyone in her household are well and germ free before going there! People should at least warn you prior to meeting because some people wouldnt bat an eyelid but I would certainly cancel.

Yes this annoys me aswell!! Especially with school/nursery. I kept my son off for 3 days in total after his last vomiting incident as it had really knocked his appetite and energy levels aswell, he missed sports day and his taster day. I was so so upset for him. Then I take him back and the following day overhear a parent saying about how their child had the runs and a little sick last night but is ok now!! Irresponsible and selfish and totally defeats the object of me keeping son at home. There could be kids there that can't fight these bugs like others. YADNBU.

This makes me so angry! It has happened to us a few times. The first time it happened my DD1 was only 6 months old. Long story short after 2 very late night trips to the walk in/a&e and 5 trips to the doctors someone finally took us seriously. She was dehydrated badly, high temp and very poorly we had to stay in hospital a few days as her oxygen level was dropping when she slept. Turns out she had the adenovirus! People should understand babies/toddlers and old people are obviously going to catch it and it effects them a lot worse than a younger person. I don't see why people cannot stay home for a few days. They can do stuff when they are actually better!

YADNBU

Someone took their 3yo to childcare with it just before the summer break because they didn't want to miss out. We escaped but friends 2yo DC caught it and passed it to all in their house. Friend has been alternating between sick and raging ever since. Not least when their baby was admitted to hospital this week with dehydration as a result of vomiting.

Why are people so very very selfish?!

Terrible. We had d&v at the start of the year when I was 12 weeks pregnant and already suffering from terrible sickness, I have never been so ill in my life. Again, we’d gone to a group and all the kids went down with it at the same time, the next day inc. another mum who was also pregnant. We never found out who the culprit was!

YADDDNBU

This is selfish wankers, complete cunts and unfortunately it’s rife.

School is the worst, parents lying and not telling the School and bringing in sick/ contagious kids to share the nasty germs.

Last time my DS was off School for two weeks and was taken by ambulance to hospital for dehydration due to some inconsiderate bastards sending their still contagious child back to School.

There can be children with immune compromised systems and things like this make them very very unwell.

I am very vocal with this and will call parents out as well as happy shop them to the school, who are very strict with the 48 hours ruling.

Seriously those that do this (and I bet there are plenty on this site) are selfish inconsiderate wankers and complete cunts.

Don’t fucking do it. Life is not all about you.

We never found out who the culprit was

They might have passed it on before the symptoms started. I did that at work once. Met up for a meeting, worked with colleagues all day. Vomiting started at 6pm in my hotel room (no symptoms till then).

I put myself in quarantine but a few of my colleagues still caught it. I still feel guilty be really there no way I could have known.

People who let their kids socialise again straight after a vomiting bug are either utterly ignorant or selfish.

There was a woman I used to work with who would regularly come in despite being up all night being sick when there was a bug going around. If you know you've got it, why come in and infect others?

ConstantlyCold

We are talking when a kid has been sick a few hours/ night before ( certainly wayyyyyyyy before 48 hours since last episode of sickness) and then the fucking bastard that calls themselves a parent decides little Johnny will be taken to the play group or Nursery or School or party because they have stopped being sick ( or are still unwell) because they couldn’t possibly let them miss out, regardless of any other child.

People are such selfish cunts.

Our school takes no prisoner's and has been know to turn children away if they know they have been sick the day before. The staff don't appicate stickiness bugs going round school.

So YADDDDNBU

It's very selfish of anyone to do this. There are children at school who I know with health problems for who a sickness bug can be quite serious.

Thread on here recently about people sharing food, forks ice cream after being really ill and concensus was it's fine.

So there you go!!
My dd will probably end up in hospital with vomiting bug..

Sharing saliva is fine apparently, so yeah play dates moments after the sick bowl is put away doesn't surprise me at all.

@SureNotSure - if that's a genuine question then yes. Yes, it was. I would LOVE that to be an official rule at my work, instead of feeling guilty when I want a day off sick.

YANBU in the slightest. Sadly, there are a lot of selfish people who just don't care or want to do something and think it's fine to put themselves first.

My workplace has the 48 rule, it's there for a reason.

Glad it's not just me. DD only threw up once last night in the end and seems ok this morning but we have still cancelled our plans for today! Obviously!

It's not worth getting worked up about. Your child could just as easily catch it on a bus or in a shop.
This isn't true. Yes it's possible, but kids are far, far more likely to get it when they come directly into contact with a child who has vomited recently. In fact DD has only ever vomited on the 2 occasions I described. I have only had a d&v bug once as an adult, and that's when DD got it at Christmas.

Sometimes, the germs are being spread before someone even knows they're sick.
Nothing they can do about that. I'm talking about the people who know, and do it anyway. Also this is very unusual with a d&v bug, as the germs are spread through contact with infected vomit or stool, not through coughing/saliva. If there's no vomit/stool you can't pass it on.

Why focus on one stupid person and waste your energy?
Unfortunately it's not just one stupid person. ButI wanted to get a sense of why people do this - whether it is a lack of knowledge about how bugs are spread, or selfishness, or just not thinking it's a big deal. I will be in contact with the other nanny and make sure she knows what has happened. I won't go in all guns blazing but she needs to know that there were/will be consequences when she does this and hopefully won't do it again.

I work in a school and I've lost count of the times that kids have said to me that they were sick in the night.
I usually tell them that their adults shouldn't have sent them in but it's not the child's fault obviously.
One little boy told me that his mum had told him he'd be fine and Mrs Rainbowstardrops etc will look after you.
Gives me the rage!!!!