to tell them to wear pink dresses?

[greyday9]

I'm having a small wedding (just family) but I believe a photographer is vital. I want nice pictures to remember.

I have three sisters, and naturally we will have photos with just us on the day. I want these pictures to look great, and I think the best way to do that would be if the colours compliement each other.

I want them all to wear light pink dresses. I think if they all wore different colours or patterns the pictures wouldn't look as good. AIBU to insist on this?

They will be the only 'young' women there, other than the two mums and a grandmother.

They're your sisters and you know them best. Would they mind?

If one of sister's asked me I wouldn't have a problem with it as I love them and would be happy to go with it. It doesn't seem as if you're insisting on a particular style etc.

Why not make them bridesmaids if you want to have a say in their outfits?

Meh. I'd do it for my sister. Probably not for anyone else but these things are different for sisters.

I wouldn't mind if my sister asked me to do this for a small low-key wedding. I really treasure the photos I have of my sisters and me at my wedding and at hers.

Could you be a bit more flexible and ask them to wear pastel colours - pale pink, mint, yellow, sky blue so they're more likely to have something already in their wardrobe? Or discuss what colour they would all like? For my middle sister's very low key wedding, we chatted amongst ourselves and wore yellow. Photos are lovely.

YABVU unless you know that they all like the colour pink and would wear the dresses again, and even then you should ask, not tell. And don't get stroppy if they say no.

I hate pink, look awful in it, would never wear it, so it'd be a no from me.

You wouldn't be unreasonable to ask, though TBH I'd find it odd, but you would be unreasonable to 'tell' them.

I think you do maybe need to let go a bit if you're worried about people's outfits not being harmonious in your photos, OP, as it kind of suggests you are at risk of worrying too much about little details to really enjoy your wedding day. It doesn't have to be perfect, it will be wonderful as it is - mismatching outfits, shonky weather, disappointing dessert etc and all.

Honestly? It’s not the specifying a colour but specifying a shade of that colour that would make this hard work. I find light pink an almost impossible colour to wear and, in any case, don’t see this shade in the shops very often. It can look lovely on women with dark olive skin but perhaps is not popular with pale Northern Europeans.

If your sister turned up in a dark pink dress, would this bother you? If so then please don’t specify a colour / shade.

You said "young women", so I am assuming they're 18 plus.
Insisting on a colour is a bit much, unless you pay for it.

I have never owned a light pink dress, and I certainly wouldn't be buying one as a guest, just because my sibling wanted a particular colour. I would never wear it again.

If they already have something they can wear, fair enough, but you are being unreasonable to insist they buy something in a specific colour if they are guests.

You want it, you pay. There are loads of sales on at the moment, so you could get 3 really nice dresses for a reasonable price.

www.asos.com/women/dresses/cat/?cid=8799&currentpricerange=0-450&nlid=ww%7Cclothing%7Cshop%20by%20product&page=1&refine=base_colour%3A9

Why don't you just ask your sisters?

Either you make them bridesmaids and buy the dresses you want them to wear or they are guests and they get yo wear what they want!

I would never ever wear any shade of pink dress unless that is what you chose (and bought) me to wear because I've been chosen as your bridesmaid. As a guest I wear whatever I want (within reason) or I don't come.

Totally unreasonable unless you're honouring them by asking them to be part of the wedding (in which case the dress would be provided). Sounds like you want bridesmaids on the cheap.

Why don't you hire some models to be in the photograph instead of your sisters. You can have your sisters' faces superimposed afterwards .
It would same any inconvenience caused by them not wearing the right outfits.

YABVVVU

HTH.

TBH, if someone told me, even a close relative that I need to wear a certain dress colour so it looks "good" on the photos, I'd tell them to take a hike.
I don't get the idea of a "perfect" wedding where everything has to be coordinated, organised and dressed to fit a certain pattern. A wedding should be about love and care and celebration of the loving couple and not a theatre show. But that's just me.

I think you'd be unreasonable to insist. However, I don't think it would be unreasonable to ask. If I were one of your sisters, I would do this for you.

troodiedoo

I went to a wedding once where all female guests were told to wear pink, and males blue.

And you didn't vomit???

You want nice photographs to remember??

What about nice memories to remember just don't get too pissed

What you are suggesting is bloody ridiculous & quite insulting, IMHO.

It's only ok if you offer to pay for their dresses.

(Waves at the shitty tabloid lazy journalist)
If you hired models you could choose what they looked like physically as well.
If your DSiss are all taller than you, you could choose petite models so that you looked taller than them.

The photos are not the most important part of the wedding. If you want your sisters to wear light pink, you should buy them light pink dresses.

Why don't you just ask your sisters?

Exactly. Just talk to them, ask them, listen to what they say, and take it from there. Telling grown women what to wear, even on your wedding day, isn’t likely to achieve the desired result.

Do they already have suitable dresses? Or would you be asking them to buy things in a colour they never wear?

What?! You can't tell guests what to wear ffs!! If you want them as part of some colour scheme make them bridesmaids.

When my friend got married and I was MoH I had to pay for my own dress that she chose, is that unusual?

If you make them
Bridesmaids and buy the dresses yanbu.

If you ask them to
Be bridesmaids but ask they pay for their own dresses that you choose and they freely agree and you know accept they might not. Yanbu.

If you ask all guests to wear a particular colour, well id say
Yabu but that seems to be creeping in so maybe only a little u.

If you
Insist your aiaters wear a particular colour so basically bms
Without them
Being bms, just for the photos. Yabu.