to think that if I want to buy a homeless person a coffee I can?

[SuperMassiveIssue]

In McDonald's. Homeless man taps me on the shoulder at the self service. 'Excuse me miss, I'm homeless and was wondering if you could spare any change' - me: 'I've got no change on me but I will happily buy you a coffee?' - homeless man: 'that would be amazing if you could, thank you so much'

At which point a miserable old git scowled at me and said 'you're just as much of a problem as they are'

I feel angry. We don't do enough for the homeless in the UK in my opinion and actually, what harm is it for me to buy a man a drink?

Probably should've let it go over my head but it's upset me as my brother was homeless for a short while. He's wonderful, generous, kind, and sadly misguided at times. He's turned his life around and I'm so glad for those who bought coffee and food for him whilst he was homeless unbeknownst to his family...

It would piss me off too.
I can imagine that places like McDonalds get quite a few homeless people in there but there is no reason to treat these people rudely

I think that was a lovely thing to do. Ignore the miserable gits and keep being kind.

Of course YANBU.

It upset me more because it was in earshot of the homeless man, and it must hurt to hear things like that. I think my pregnancy hormones are getting to me! Wish I could've bought him a full blown meal but I'm so skint.

It’s the miserable old git who is the problem and people like him!

Lovely of you. I openly snarled at 3 older very well dressed ladies ( maybe late 60s ) who made a similarly vile comment during the winter in Glasgow. We were on the bus and it was bitter. The spot under heilan mans umbrella always has homeless folk huddled there, sleeping. These 3 started tutting and one said, “ bloody awful mess these scum make! I do wish people wouldn’t feed them, it encourages the drunken buggers to stay here” ! Her friends nodding along still tutting. I properly stared her down. As if anyone would choose that situation in Scotland in the winter!

I think what you were doing was lovely

People get very confused when they hear statements about sometimes helping the homeless in a certain way can profound the issue

What they actually mean (and I know because not that long ago I owned / ran a scheme to support people on the streets) is that groups that just feed and clothe without signposting and supporting people through professional services can indeed make things so much worse

But the worst aspect of society hear these issues and boil it down to " you should never help someone on the street" which is ridiculous

Ignore him OP he was an ignorant man who needed to stamp his authority when he has none

You are well within your right to buy anyone you wish a coffee.

I've done his myself more than once. I will always buy a homeless person something to eat and a warm drink if i can, and if they have a dog I'll buy the dog something too! More than one occasion I've taken roast left overs to our local homeless man (partucularly xmas and new year, bank hols etc) aswell as items of dh clothing he no longer wants. He is always polite and says thank you,

You did a lovely thing. People are homeless for so many reasons, it doesn't mean they are all drug addicts scrounging for money which sadly seems to be the common perception. So pleased your brother was able to turn his life around.

That man was the problem not either of you. Please don't let his comment bother you, he was absolutely in the wrong.

A few years ago I worked for a charity that helped the homeless in Glasgow and it was started partly because McDonalds were concerned about the number of homeless in the area. They were concerned in a good way and put money into a charity to help. I wish I could remember more details but it was 35 years ago but McDonalds were really good and not in any way judgemental
Well done OP for buying a person a hot drink. YANBU

I used to work for a homeless charity. We always said not to give money, but give money to places like us, so that we can try and get homeless people off the streets. Yes, they often do drink and use drugs, but that's often to be able to cope with the cold and hardships of sleeping on a pavement in thick snow!

But... on a cold day, giving someone who is homeless a warm cuppa or something to eat is a lovely thing to do. Don't let these assholes get you down OP.

I hate how some people are about homelessness

Really hate it
‘They will just spend it on drugs
Or
Some beggars are richer than us (yeah right)
Or
It’s best to give to homeless charities

They are humans who have to sleep in a sleeping bag on a concrete floor

I always give something . I think the fact that a human being acknowledges them as another Fellow is very important

What you did was a lovely thing however I’ve worked at McDonald’s and have been verbally and physically abused by homeless people when no one would give them any money or buy them any food.

Lots of homeless people suffer with mental health issues which will mean they can be aggressive one day then back the next day very polite.

When you’ve had someone screaming in your face, smashing chairs around or dirty protesting one day you can look like a right arsehole refusing them entry when they’re being nice the next day.

The worker shouldn’t have said anything to you though.

I could see, but not necessarily agree with his logic if you were about to hand over cash, but a coffee? There is no harm in it at all!

Some people ar annoyed by other's generosity.

It's lovely that you got him a coffee when you're skint yourself.

@stopfuckingshoutingatme - actually, you'd be amazed at how much they make begging. A lot more than I earn per week working my butt off. Sad but true. They can get free clothes and free food. They also have no responsibilities, council tax, utility bills etc. For a lot of them it is a choice they make as they can't/don't want the responsibilities of renting/owning a house. It's a hard life, but a lot of them don't want anything different, as they're content as they are.

You did a really nice thing. Tbh, I don't tend to give change to homeless people but I have bought hot drinks and sandwiches. If others want to give money, I don't criticise - it's up to them.

You did a nice thing. Ignore people like that. The stats (some years back I admit, when Esther Rantzen did a documentary, it was but I I will Google current stats too) were 86% of homeless people have mental health issues & fallen thru v large cracks in the system - which is terrible. To those awful people I'd say have some humanity, if you kick people when they are down they stay down.

You can buy them a gin and tonic for all I care. Good to see that the old Victorian idea that helping beggars is adding to the problem, is still alive and well.[sigh]

Well done, OP. I'm particularly susceptible to homeless women and can't pass one by without giving them something. I know people disapprove of me, do I care? Not in the least, people in need are worth more than mean bastards without an ounce of compassion.

I would have certainty told him in no uncertain terms that it was my business who I was buying coffee for. Unfortunately some people have absolutely zero empathy or compassion for others.

I had similar a few weeks ago I was buying a large sausage roll for a homeless woman.

Checkout operator "i thought you didnt eat stuff like this"
Me. I dont Its for the homeless woman outside.
CO "shes not genuine homeless. they are on drugs . I have to work for what i get. Theres no way i would be buying her anything. "

This woman is one half of a couple who was made homeless due to the fact they couldnt pay their mortgage any longer after the husband was diagnosed with cancer.

But no Its cos they are all on drugs innit. I can see why my MP has a safe seat.

55% of all homeless families are working Dispatches Working and Homeless on channel 4 now.

In many areas homeless people tend to congregate around areas where they are likely to get the most they can (whether that is generosity from people like yourself, access to a bathroom, drugs, shelter from the rain, etc.) can't really blame them for that, but it does mean those areas suffer from the strain of people who have a lot of needs and, often, a lot of mental health problems and some criminal connections (drugs and prostitution, normally). And it's the residents and businesses that are in the area that bear the brunt of the impact of that. You get to walk away if someone starts to shout and swear at you. The guy in McDonald's probably has to put up with it quite a lot more. I think what you did was nice, but from the perspective of the person in McDonald's you are encouraging people who may well have been abusive and threatening to him at some point.