To ask how you fit in exercise?

[drspouse]

I currently work 4 days and so does DH but he commutes quite a long way so I do most of the drop offs and pick ups. He does WFH sometimes but not on a regular day.
I cycle to work mostly on the day he's at home and I try to cycle with DD who currently goes to my workplace nursery but a) she's 4 and heavy and b) often I have too much to carry as her seat only allows one small pannier.
She's starting school in Sept but I'll still be doing at least 75% of the school runs.
I have a horrible hamstring pain at the moment so I want to do some yoga but leaving aside that many of the local classes close for the summer, they are all at 8 am (useless for school run) or 5 pm (ditto after school club).
I also really need to do some aerobic exercise - I do 10K steps most days with school run/errands/dashing to meetings at work but it's not helping me lose weight sadly.
So do share your secrets!
I'm happy doing gym classes but the machines leave me cold.
I'm in the kind of job where I have a meeting at 12, 1 and 2 one day but then can take a bit over an hour the next but it's not massively regular. Not sure I could fit in a full gym class plus shower at lunchtime regularly.
Weekends are quite full on (two DC, older awaiting SEN diagnosis, we try to both have a breather away from the DCs but we do have to schedule them, and us therefore, to help them both feel like they know what's happening).
Pre DCs I cycled more, but also went for a lot of long walks that they can't do. I also have annoying chest infections most winters!

I prioritise exercise and life/work/family has to fit around it. (being self employed helps.)

I don't like classes. I lift weights by myself or run by myself.

I don't know why women are so big on classes. I think women are socialised from an early age not to do things alone.

I go to the gym 5.30-6.30 each day before DH has to go to work

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When I go to the gym, I see men of all ages (wearing wedding rings) at all times of the day.

I see women under 25 and women over 45.

I see relatively few women of child-bearing age.

I also see threads on here about husbands (fathers of young children) who are gone all weekend training for triathlons.

I see threads on here from mothers looking for a good dvd they can try and do at home.

What I take away from these observations is that men are more selfish than women.

Be more selfish.

Do you have spare cash? If so, could you find an early evening class plus a babysitter? Or a fancy gym (like David Lloyd!) with children’s classes and a crèche? Also, here, the council gym has classes at 7pm and 8pm, and the PureGym has 45 min lunchtime classes, and a few later evening ones- they would be a 10 min drive for me, how far from home have you looked (are you rural/ suburban?).

When mine were 4 and 6 I did two early runs (and also had to be back for dh’s train!) plus a w/e morning, also we would all go swimming and dh and I would take 20 min each for lengths (after 40min chdn were cold), and I did one 8pm class if he was home in time (again had to drive to get to it), but it was the hardest time- when they were younger I was at home and used a council gym with crèche at 930, when they were older I could run early or in evenings and leave them at home- this stage does pass!

The thing is fitting in exercise is never easy and that's especially true with small children. To fit it in you have to squeeze it in and not allow excuses to stop you or you'll never do it. Yes it's hard, yes a couple of mornings a week you may need to get up earlier. It's not easy, if it was everyone would be fit and healthy. You just need to pick something you can do at home (there's a lot of examples here) and get on with it. I have a daughter that's a terrible sleeper, but if I allowed tiredness as an excuse, I never exercise. It's hard to get into the habit, but I feel far better getting up 45 mins earlier and exercising than I do with that extra 45 mins sleep.

I'd also get the 4 & 6 year old to bed earlier. Occasionally is fine, but unless my 5 year old is in bed by 7 she's a tired mess. Especially if they're waking up when your OH gets up; they're only getting 9hrs ?

I haven't read the whole thread so apologies if this isn't a suitable suggestion but could you do a martial arts class with your kids? I did this with ds when he was younger and he loved it and it really improved my fitness too.

I go to a 5am gym class 3 days per week and then another 2 early on the weekend.

But, if you want to lose weight it is much easier to eat less than to exercise. It's maths. It takes 5 mins to eat it and one hour to burn it. Eat less is much easier. If your goal is to be fit and healthy exercise more. 10k steps a day is great. You are already doing much more than most. Just eat less. Or better. More salads. More protein. Less sugar and carbs.

Not sure if I'm missing something (quite possible) but as I understand it, with effect from September

• You have 1 weekday off work
• Your DH also has 1 weekday off work
• You are both off work both days at the weekend.
• Occasionally you could exercise at lunchtime on your workdays
• Both your DC are in full day school.

So, on your day off, you basically have from 9-3pm to fit in some exercise, so that must be possible. On your DH's day off you have between 6-8am assuming he deals with the kids that morning (and you reciprocate when it's your day off). At the weekend, just do an hour of tag team each and stick the DC in front of the tv/ipad if necessary.

Scrap the idea for classes as your schedule is too full and classes are too inflexible- you can miss an hour long class start by 10 mins but if you just went to the gym and did your own thing then you'd still have 50 mins if you see what I mean. Plus you don't really need an hour - you can do an effective workout in 30 mins, especially if you focus on strength (5 min warm up, alternate 3 sets of 2 exercises at a heavy weight, 5 mins abs).

Also, do you have a garden/ access to any outside space? If so, buy a skipping rope. Can do 15 mins each night. When singles get too easy, switch to do double unders (You tube).

Why not do exercise which involves the DC? Get a wii fit and involve them in that (yoga is included). Go to the park and play football or jog. Go swimming.

I can solve all your problems! Have you heard of Kayla Itsines? She designed the BBG workout - bikini body guide. You do a 28 minute workout 3 times a week. You can do all the exercises from home without any equipment. I bought the guide from her website a couple of years ago but she has an app called SWEAT now.

There's no excuses about not having time because each workout is only 28 minutes! It's a mix of resistance training and cardio. You can add weights if you have them or want to make it harder.

Seriously, look up her Instagram @kayla_itsines
She posts 12 week body transformations from all kinds of people using her guide. It's really motivating!

I run. My boys are older now but I originally started running because it was easy to fit in. You can just go whenever there's a bit of free time. Earlyish morning can be good if your dp is at home.

Now they are older (13 & 10), they sometimes come running with me or cycle whilst I run if dp isn't in.

I also used to cycle a fair bit before having kids & started doing so again when the boys were older and could cycle with me.

I struggle at the moment.

I am a keen runner and also swim. Single parent of a 9 and 19 yo.
Full time job.

DS1 is at uni so often it's just me and DS2. I can do my sport when he's at school or football club. When DS1 is home it's easier to get out early or late which I love.

When DS1 is home with me it's hard. We do a very casual boot camp together. If he takes a friend swimming I can then do laps if there is a lane roped off. I seize the moment when he's at parties or with friends. Sometimes I will ask a friend to sit with him so I can go out (I really need my sport).

Running is very easy to fit around everything else so that's good. For me it gives me way more than fitness, it's the time alone, the buzz, the unwinding etc, and for that reason I wouldn't go dvds or you tube stuff at home.

“I don't know why women are so big on classes. I think women are socialised from an early age not to do things alone.”

I didn’t even try group fitness until my late 30s, often did and still do stuff alone. Advantages of group classes include that once unless cancelling on time you get fined if you don’t go, and someone would miss out on the space, which is extra motivation to attend. No need to self motivate once there, you just do as you’re told, and everyone else is doing it, which helps motivate to keep going. Instructors are good and vary the routines, the music is fun and I like the company too. Have met more people from my community.

When I went to the gym, for example, it literally felt like more of the treadmill of working/commuting life, and I’d often let myself off the hook! Eg slowing down the machines.

I work 5 days and also have DH that works long hours. I've tried to overhall my fitness regime recently and it is hard when you are knackered.

The thought of getting up early is awful if you are knackered - BUT if you make yourself do it a few times you do get used to it and you then start to have more energy. The more exercise you do the better you feel.

I am another fan of the down dog app - if you like Yoga it is the closest app to being in an actual class.

So I roll out of bed at 6am and do 30 mins of yoga every day - I literally wear my bedclothes (vest and shorts) and just crawl onto the mat into child's pose. I think the fact that it's not energetic makes it easier for me to face doing it, and I feel brilliant by the time it's done. Then I'm ready and energised for the day by 6.30am.

I also recommend (as others) the Jillian Michael's app, they are short (25 min) HIIT sessions so I just plan a time in the day when I do it (usually straight after getting home with the kids at around 6.30pm a few times a week). I do try to give them something to entertain them, but if they join in I do it around them. Eventually they have got used to me doing it so it's less exciting for them.

Me and DH plan our weekends to give each other a bit of free time to exercise as well.

Exercise is a habit so once you are out of it it's so so hard to get back into it. I think apps that you can use at home are really your friend here as there's no dragging yourself out of the door.

If you really are so tired that you can't face 6am or in the evenings, maybe give yourself a break and try again when they are older?

Phew! Let's just say it was more Pilrobics (mix of core and light aerobics) and my pelvic floor is not what it was. but I will try and go back when DH is home.
Classic bedtime meltdown but I managed to sneak out thankfully.

Well done for going - bet you are feeling it today!

I felt exactly like you OP and didn't do any exercise since the my first DC was born 9 years ago. My DH is out 7.30-11pm and I work 4 days plus we live very rurally so gyms are usually only open 8-5 with very few classes.
I signed up for a 3 months bootcamp with access to a fitness and a nutrition coach. Exercises started off at 10 min a day and gradually built up to 60 min (mostly HIIT, shitloads of burpees). Twice a week we have live training where the coach makes sure you're doing it right. I normally do the exercise early in the morning but sometimes with the kids. They often take part in the live training too and the coach gets them involved. I lost a full dress size (I'm in week 10 now) and got tonnes more energy so also taken up running. And the weekly meal plans are very kid friendly because I'll be damned making different meals for everyone. Alternatively my DH started working with a personal trainer and got results really fast.