To think 6 weeks will be hard to fill

[trees4thewood]

I am a teacher, it’s good to have the time off but to be honest I’m dreading it a bit, I remember getting really badly depressed a few summers ago and I can see this one being similar.

what should I do

I can't believe some of the replies you are getting! I find the summer holidays very unsettling, always have. I'm prone to anxiety and I hate the lack of structure and lack of routine. I'm not even a teacher!

The six weeks is when I catch up on everything I have neglected in the house over the course of the prevoious academic year. So, decorating, refurbishing, learning new recipes, taking up some decent exercise, mending everything that has broken and sorting out gifts for everyone for the year and Christmas.

Surely, OP, you are not superwoman and get this all done during term-time?

My heart is bleeding.

I'm a teacher and fell asleep nearly every night last week on the sofa. Friday's last day couldn't come soon enough. I've been asleep twice today too - I'm shattered.

My children are older teens so don't really need me much but my partner is also off work so I get time with him.

My plans are
Spend three days next week in school.....then...
A week in Cornwall
Two days in London
Day trip to Alton Towers
Decorating the spare room and shopping for new carpet.
Cleaning (boo)
Gardening
Meeting friends for lunch
Taking my mum out for lunch/shopping
Reading
Going for walks.

Sleep and drink Prosecco in the garden.

If you don't have kids the long summer holiday can be a bit intimidating (although if I didn't have kids now, I probably would have given up teaching a good while ago!)

Pre kids DH and I always used to go on a big holiday in the middle of the summer as that was my main time off so that broke things up again. By the time we got back it was time to start thinking about getting back into work mode, doing bits of work etc. Any other time I had I spent laying in until 11 and generally just being a waster!

I agree with others who say try and get a routine going, and also use the opportunity to do something like an exercise goal or a DIY goal? Or perhaps some volunteering?

Another one chiming in to reiterate that teachers only get paid in the holidays not for them. We get paid to work 195 days of the year, 190 of which are spent with the pupils.

We get 12 weeks here in Ireland and I don't know anyone who does schoolwork during this period! I'm quite happy to take a full break and do nothing but enjoy myself, perks of the job! However, I have a couple of friends who don't have kids and they get very down if they're not active. One volunteers to help with education in the traveling community and the other one goes travelling and has seen the world!

Actually I don’t have any Christmas presents to buy.

If I did I wouldn’t be doing them in July

I live in a one bed flat.

trees my responses have been a bit harsh because I genuinely can’t 8mag7ne an intelligent person not being able to occupy themselves. It doesn’t have to be ‘exciting things’. Reading books you’ve wanted to read all year, maybe doing some writing, sorting your house properly, going for long walks...I genuinely can’t imagine why you are struggling.

Can you really only afford a three day holiday? Have you investigated summer courses etc?

Yes I will do that cardi but alone.

It goes beyond I am bored. It is being alone that is the hard part.

Do you have any NT properties nearby. I’m sure they would love someone to volunteer. It’s really great fun and I’d recommend it. Contact them. You don’t have to be a member. Offer your time. It will keep you busy and your mind active.

Thanks

Join your local Meet Up group. I did that when I was single and met some lovely people. Many of them were teachers.

@trees4thewood I'd try to do stuff at home like declutter the whole house (this alone can last 6 weeks, depending on how thorough you are); maybe do some decorating (only cheap stuff); watch a lot of documentaries i've been meaning to on Netflix; walk everyday when the weather is nice; batch cook frozen meals so that when i got back to work i'd have some homemade ready meals in my freezer; invite friends over for a coffe or tea (could even be a potluck get party or asmall get together); help my neighbours with whatever they might need, etc.

LOLOLOLOL. ok.

Wait till you have kids OP.

I'd love 6 weeks to myself.

What nasty replies you are getting, OP! It is completely fine for you not to be looking forward to a long stint off work. I echo the helpful posters who suggested ways to fill your time. You could also advertise on FB as a tutor/nanny over the summer if you would enjoy that- I’m sure someone would love such an expert looking after their children.

I too have had issues with lack of structure in the holidays. Friends would say ' but you could have met with me' and I would respond with ' I know I could' - but I didn't.

Lack of structure and routine seemed to just make me just do less and less; unable to make decisions or motivate myself and unable to even think of what I would enjoy.

To help I wrote on slips of paper all the ideas I could think of that I might like to do and put them in a jar. Each evening I pulled out one idea for the next day. Something I had to do. It really helped me in not having to even make a decision and gave me a routine. It ended up quite fun and overtime as a line parent I even did this jointly with my young children, giving them equal choices and taking turns in selecting from the jar.

Perhaps we can make that list for you on here!

Being alone is a gift. Allows you to decompress from the relentlessness of term time. It’s not a scary thing. Anyway, I’m sure you have friends/colleagues who would meet for coffe/lunch/a walk/a weekend away in a cheap Airbnb place.
For future years, have a look at LRTT - you could go abroad with others for a month. I had to pass on a place I had this year because my dad was ill (he died, so I could have gone, but hey ho). They’re on Facebook and have a website.

I’m term time only but not teaching staff so I won’t have any “school work” to do.

I know at some point I may get bored but I will find things to do. My first week or so is hospitals/dentists etc get all my check ups done and dusted

Some of these responses are really unkind! I'm not a teacher (and have 5 weeks leave a year), and I'm a single parent to young(ish) children, so to ME the six weeks of summer without children sounds frankly blissful and I could fill it three times over without having to scratch my head and wonder what to do - but that's partly thinking the grass is always greener, and partly being very introverted with never enough alone time. I get that it's a lot of time and space to fill alone if you've had enough solitude, and I also totally get that it must be hard to find the time and mental space to plan ahead for the holidays. Sorry, that's not constructive. I know what I would do - be outside (glorious sunshine!), go to NT places and museums and for long country walks to places I haven't been before, and uninterrupted meals out, and sleep, and read, and listen properly to music, and catch up with neglected friends, and do a thorough clean and declutter of my flat, all the tedious life admin like getting a better deal on my internet and utilities and blah blah, and some writing, loads of exercise - and probably id look really hard to see if I could go away for more than just three days. But that's me, and maybe none of it is helpful to you.

I do sympathise with you OP - when my children go to their dad for ten days during the summer holidays, I feel a bit as though someone has lobbed a snake into my lap and ordered me to entertain it. Of course, I then bitch away to myself when I have the DC for the rest of the holidays...

Day trips. Stupid little, cheap day trips. Plan it in advance - TELL yourself you're getting the X bus at X time to be at X place. No excuses. Whether it's going to a beach, a church, a museum, whatever, tell yourself that's what you're doing, and plan it all out, as though you're meeting someone there.

It's probably too late to volunteer for anything now, but you could still investigate local projects & see what they'd need from you & when, so that next holidays you could have something lined up.

I have no friends.

Term time is relentless yes and I long for the holidays like anyone. Then they arrive and wham I realise how empty and cold my life actually is. Every time.

OP, I live alone and don't have children. Have no family nearby. I can relate to your situation a lot and have felt the same, especially when i wasn't in a relationship. Ignore the nasty replies!

I can’t believe that an intelligent person cannot understand and appreciate that every situation is different and that some people may find the thought of 6 weeks holiday lonely and somewhat intimidating.

OP, many food banks are very busy this time of year and lots of volunteers are parents that aren’t able to help over the 6 week holiday. Often they are open 3 days a week, maybe something like this could be of interest to you. If you have some structure you may find you enjoy the in between rest days?
It sounds cliche, but maybe join some sort of group too. Sounds like you could do with building a larger circle of friends that you could spend more time with.

Food bank is a great idea actually. Thanks. That’s a fantastic suggestion