AIBU to want to change job and leave my current employer in s**t?

[mumknowsbest47]

I really need your opinion. Bit of a long winded history but here goes...
Two years ago I left a job I loved for more money. I needed to support my family and my employer back then couldn't increase my annual salary. I loved everything about it and it broke my heart to leave but I really needed to earn more money as a single parent. So I started a new job, which was completely different, with a higher salary so all good.

About 6 months ago old employer contacts me and offers me to go back with a promotion. Tore on my heart strings and I handed in my notice to go. Anyway, my current employer didn't want me to leave and changed my role, rearranged our team and gave me a BIG increase in salary. All happy so I tell old employer I will not be coming back after all even though it is my dream role, as I need to stay where the money is. Now six months down the line they have contacted me again and offered me more money than I could even dream about. It would be my dream job and I would be massively comfortable money wise and be able to give my family lots more, holidays etc.

So, if I accept the role, my current employer will be massively in the s**t! They restructured the team around me and made things happen to keep me. They will be completely short staffed and no one will know my role. I am a loyal person (don't mean to quote Georgia from Love Island!!) and I cannot bear the thought of letting them down. I do not even know how I would pluck up the courage to tell them.

However, we are talking serious money and a job I completely love.

What would you do? Stay put and be loyal and grateful that they helped me out and increased my salary 6 months ago or look after number one and my family and go back to the job I love with a HUGE salary which would give my family so much more - but be a complete cow!!!

Help and advice please x

With all of that said, you are probably in a position to stipulate with old employer that you need a longer notice period for the purposes of due diligence- make the handover really good and they will give you good references if they aren't shitheads.

They didn't restructure the team around you. They did it for a business need. Don't fall for that one!

Go where you will be happiest. But remember you can be got rid of as easily as the next person. Plus you will be starting from scratch again. When we talk about better salary are we talking 30/40k better or 6/7k better? How much better anmonth would you be off once deduction was etc happened? That's what I would be looking at.

A job is just a job. You’ll soon be forgotten a couple of weeks after you leave. As other people have said, it’s a company. It doesn’t have thoughts or feelings.