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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want my dd to stay 3yo forever?

74 replies

WK007 · 29/05/2007 13:22

Just got the introduction letter from dd's school-to-be and feel almost narked. I don't want dd to go to school and grow up, she's gorgeous and fun and cuddly as she is and I want her to be my tiny little baby girl forever.

I can't have another one so soon I'm going to end up with a stroppy teenager and my LO will be gone for good.

AIBU to think this shouldn't be allowed?

(and its time of the month so I'm willing to accept I'm being emotional and unreasonable)

OP posts:
kittyhas6 · 29/05/2007 22:41

I have a psycho three year old atm , not my fav age, but ellbell, that' poem' is really wonderful.

colditz · 30/05/2007 08:03

no, ds1 was bloody hideous at 3 years old. Beautiful, and affectionate, and charming, and endearing etc, but also completely uncontrollable and mindlessly destructive. He is now 4, and I am going to miss him so much in September - I really don't want him to go, TBH - preschool hours would suit me for a while yet!

Judy1234 · 30/05/2007 08:22

Have another on your own then like my sister did by donor sperm and then you won't have such an age gap either between her and the next. My twin 8 year olds are very cute and their sisters and brother are reasonably soon going to be able to have children - the girls are 22 and 20 so hopefully by the time they twins hit spots and hormones we won't be long from grandchildren - continuous stream of 3 year olds almost. Or you could foster.

StickyWicket · 30/05/2007 09:12

Problem with fostering is that you have to give them back, and often you have to give them back to a less than ideal set up.

remember that couple who snatched the sisters and went to live in a caravan for 8 weeks? They had been fostering them for years, and had been refused for adoption. (I think they got to keep them in the end)

OrmIrian · 30/05/2007 11:54

Just wanted to add that my DS#1 who is a huuuuge 10 yr old with feet nearly as big as mine, give me hugs that almost knock me off my feet

madmarchhare · 30/05/2007 12:06

Im with colditz on this one, I find 3 difficult. Does the destructive behaviour just stop at 4 then? [hoping emotion]

colditz · 30/05/2007 12:08

It got a lot better MMh

FioFio · 30/05/2007 12:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MrsJetson · 30/05/2007 12:13

Madmarch - I'm hoping so - DS2 turns 4 in October. Surely he cannot get ANY worse!

Meglet · 30/05/2007 12:43

DS is just 6 months but am looking forward to toddler days as they are soooo funny , despite the chaos! the thought of him going to school is quite scary! Glad its not just me who thinks toddlers are wonderful.

Countingthegreyhairs · 30/05/2007 15:51

Oh no - you've set me off too now - !
Not unreasonable at all WK007.

LOL shaved orang SuzyW

My 4 yr old dd started pre-school a whole year ago now. She loves it but seems so grown up when she runs off without a backward glance in the mornings! Trying for no. 2 but 43 now so good chance she will be our last too so can totally sympathise. When I was pregnant my ob/gyn said 'treasure these precious early years because that's what gets you through the rest'. Must start sticking those photos in albums, video clips on CDs and writing things down. Not sure it will help though .. sniff.

At the same time: starting to dread the start of the school holidays! Contradictory or what?

karlou · 30/05/2007 17:48

I really wasn't looking forward to either of my dd's starting school. I have one in Year 3 and one in Reception and both times I wanted the months before they started to go by as slowly as possible. That said it's lovely watching them become enthusiastic about their learning, especially with my eldest now she's in Key Stage 2. They stay your best friends - you just have more to talk about.

Mind you I'm expecting our 3rd LO in October so I've got to go through it all again in a few years and I know I'll be just as bad!

kate100 · 30/05/2007 18:03

DS1 is 4 in July and starts school in January and I want time to stand still. He has just got over his toddler tantrums and is such a good companion, he seems to learn more and more everyday and everything is still an adventure for him. I dread him turning into a surly teenager. I cried when I filled out his application for school and I know I'll be the mum in the playground on the first day crying my heart out. Still, I do have ds2 and it will be nice to have some time just the 2 of us, especially now he's finding his voice.

karlou · 30/05/2007 18:11

My dd's school is a church school and each September the vicar holds an informal meeting in the church on the first day of school for new parents. It's a chance to have a cup of coffee and a chat with others in the same boat - whether it's the first time or not. Most mums (not many dads attend) look a bit weepy but nobody feels silly. Each child has a candle lit for them and the vicar says a short prayer for those who want to join in, bit insists it's not compulsory.
It's a lovely gesture and much appreciated by all the parents.

Mamamoor · 30/05/2007 19:10

I think my favourite time with dd1 was between 3 and 4. I was pregnant with dd2 and dd1 was going to nursery. I really enjoyed that time we had on our own when she was such a little cutie and we could actually have proper conversations and her wonder at the world was so lovely to be a part of. She's now in Reception and still a cutie but sadly don't have as much special time with her as I would like due to dd2 who is now 15 months and very demanding. Now looking forward to dd2 starting to talk!

hayes · 30/05/2007 19:14

as your children get older and pass milestones, you just feel prouder and prouder of them.

My oldest is 13 and he is such a gorgeous, pleasant, happy young man....but he is still my baby always has been always will be ... that feeling never leaves.

the baby of the family is 5 going on 50 and I must admit to feeling a bit sad the older she gets, still has that proud feeling mixed in with the sadness though

cadelaide · 30/05/2007 21:20

Ellbell, your little bit of Adrian Mitchell brought to mind this one from Yeats;

The angels are stooping
Above your bed;
They weary of trooping
With the whimpering dead.

God's laughing in heaven
To see you so good;
The Shining Seven
Are gay with His mood.

I kiss you and kiss you,
My pigeon, my own;
Ah, how I shall miss you
When you have grown.

...and now no more maudlin meanderings from me

jandeb · 30/05/2007 21:33

been going through this for years with my youngest(8), after 4 you would think i'd be happy. I'm a childminder now but it's not the same.

foxcub · 30/05/2007 22:25

WK007 - I think its time you had another baby!!

rollonsummerholidays · 30/05/2007 23:59

aw loved the one about coming down the stairs must print that off and keep it and this one is lovely too.

Countingthegreyhairs · 31/05/2007 10:32

Great poems - I've printed them off too - and what a lovely post Hayes ....

foxcub · 31/05/2007 22:30

Ellbell - Thanks for that poem, I keep thinking of it, everytime my DD puts her chubby little hand in mine

jajas · 31/05/2007 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rollonsummerholidays · 31/05/2007 23:50

I want my hubby to have a reverse vascectomy what are the chances of him having it? plus my big 40 is looming [bulsh]

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