To not see how I can follow the advice 'feed baby what ever you are having'?

[ethelfleda]

Maybe I am being over cautious- 8mo is my PFB after all and am terrified of getting the weaning thing wrong!

But yesterday was the first time I've had him weighed since we started weaning him. All fine - perfect weight gain etc but the HV is telling me that as long as I'm not giving him honey or full nuts, anything goes!

So... what about the piri piri smoked fish I had earlier in the week? And should I not make him separate portions of chilli with less spice in? Tonight's dinner is veggie omelette - should I just get over myself and give him some of that? Or carry on giving separate food to us?

I feel pretty stupid for finding this so difficult!

I don’t think I’ve ever cooked a separate meal for the kids. I have friends who have never sat and eaten with their kids which I find more weird. Also never puréed anything. My 2 year old will eat anything, 3 year old has decided she only wants to eat fish, no meat. I’m happy with that because she has tried all the meats and just doesn’t like it.

Within reason I think she means (obv not if you have a take away or something laden with salt), also did she say about him not getting full milk till 1 or has that changed?

I don’t think I’ve ever cooked a separate meal for the kids. I have friends who have never sat and eaten with their kids which I find more weird. Also never puréed anything. My 2 year old will eat anything, 3 year old has decided she only wants to eat fish, no meat. I’m happy with that because she has tried all the meats and just doesn’t like it.

I wish we'd gone more this way, we have two fussies and two non fussy and I think it's cos we always tried to adapt food to be something we were sure they'd enjoy more than what we were having

I am a slattern so kids both had what we had. Unless dh and I were making a conscious decision to sit down and have a meal together and talk... Then I'd feed them earlier (usually fish fingers, as I said I'm a slattern)

I give DD2 pretty much anything unless it's really salty. Even if it's spicy she still tries it. Sometimes she can't physically eat any of it (I have a great photo of her gnawing on a pork rib :o) but it's still good to chew on and practise all the skills needed later. I just tend to prep more veg if the main is something I'd rather she didn't have. TBH though she gives anything a go and they are not going to be eating much in volume at this age anyway so if she grabs it she can eat it.

It’s worth also remembering that however great your DC may be at eating, regardless of method used for weaning, a lot of children around the 3/4 years old mark will suddenly become incredibly fussy and refuse stuff they’ve merrily been eating for years. It was at this age that I did something I’d never done before, which was whizz up pasta sauce with veg in it to a smooth sauce. DD overnight refused to have ‘lumpy’ food that she’d had from the start. Ditto yoghurt with fruit, no thank you mother. Obviously it didn’t last but a small part of me died that day (though I perked up when I realised that lots of friends’ DC did exactly the same thing around that age - we all had our smugness at how our DC loved this, that and the other thrown back in our faces!).

I’ve been observing DD’s friends round for play dates (they’re all 8/9) and I’ve noticed that a child who will eat everything eats incredibly quickly and doesn’t actually appear to have much sense of taste (she told me that the veggie sausages I gave her tasted exactly the same as meat ones - they really really don’t), whereas another child who is ‘fussier’ appears to enjoy and savour the food she does like far more.

Titty why's that sad? I eat with the DC at about 4.30 when the food's ready on schooldays because they're ravenous, about 5 at weekends, DH isn't ready for food that early and eats at about 10, when we're all in bed. Are we supposed to stay up to eat with DH?

When ds2 was about 11 months, we were at a friend's and had an Indian take away. Our friend had a chicken madras. He spent the meal with ds on his lap, taking it in turns to have a mouthful of curry and rice. He's 14 now and still loves very spicy food. All your dc to experiment and experience all foods.

Many cultures wean babies with spiced food- I have lived in a country that has a very hot cuisine.

There is difference between giving babies spicy food ( as in chilli) and other spices.

A PP said Mexicans give babies no spices- I doubt that.
Many cultures will hold back the chilli for babies- but other spices are fine.

So a baby can happily eat a curry (no salt), made with meat or veg, cumin, coriander, turmeric, ginger, garlic etc.
That can be made in a pot, and when served adults can sprinkle on some salt and chilli .
This is done the world over.

speakout that was me, and that was what my Mexican friend told me. Maybe that's how she and her nephews and nieces were weaned.

Are you sure she meant all spices though?

Mexican food will often contain cumin, coriander, paprika etc.
None of these are "spicy"

I think we often use the ideas of heat from chilli and spicy interchangeably, and sometimes with confusion.

A dish can be spicy and flavourful while having zero heat.

Yes, I am, and I'm well aware of the difference between "hot" and "spicy". I tend to make very hot food myself and brought all 4 of my DC up on it. I was just interested in how people in Mexico did it. As I said, that might just be her family.

The comment about 'nursery food'... my 15 month old daughter eats really well at nursery.

They have a chef who makes all kinds of 'proper food' such as Moroccan pork, chilli, pies, and yes even curries!

My children were weaned on low salt but spiced food. They enjoyed things like Chicken Tikka Masala (adult medium heat) at 9 months old. They would have eaten peri peri at that age without any problems. (I'd be super paranoid about bones but certainly not the spice)

DS1 was weaned on baby food & Annabel Karmel recipes. He's the faddiest, most unhealthy eater ever. DS2 was weaned on whatever I was having. Curried parsnip soup was his first taste of real food. He eats anything.

Yes it's fine to give them what you are eating, as everyone has commented just be careful of salt content and sugar content in things. With regards to spicy things, I think it depends on your baby, I believe they let you know what is too spicy but if you are worried just keep a bit separate at cooking, and add more iof your spice after you take theirs out. My DS love chilli con carne, smoked haddock and a curry, I think the more flavours and textures you give now the better and they soon let you know what they don't like.

Interestingly, I did BLW with my DD and gave her pretty much anything and everything. As a baby she loved greens and would happily munch a spear of asparagus. Now, at 4 she is a fully fledged member of the fussy beige brigade. Very frustrating.

So what I tend to do, is if we are having say chicken and pasta the baby (7mo) gets some pasta and I poach a bit of chicken for her, rather than fry and depending on the sauce she'll get a bit of that too for flavour.

Probably easier as we have a pre-schooler too so we tend to have a non-spicy option a available (either more yoghurt added or some of the sauce spooned off before slice is added).

If you want something spicy just give the baby a pouch and a bread stick.

When mine were tiny, mid-70s, everything we had for dinner from spag bol, roast dinner, beef stroganoff etc, went through a mouli grater. No processor or liquidiser then! The resultant gratings were mixed with a drop of gravy! No tins or jars used!

@likeacrow

Honestly things turned around when he started a private nursery at just over 2 years old. They would report that he had eaten x, y, z - things he would reject at home. Some examples being chicken curry, chilli, broccoli, porridge. The turning point for me was when his key worker said one day that she had been surprised as within a minute or 2 of putting his bowl of porridge down to him it was gone - she even checked the floor to see if it had been spilled. Whereas at home, porridge was mostly unheard of. If it was offered it would have been one spoonful followed by all sorts of coughing/gagging/crying.

We just said enough was enough and made more effort to eat as a family, encouraging and praising him for at least trying, always having part of the meal as something we knew he would eat alongside something new. More often than not he liked what he had and seemed happier eating with us.

Our youngest now has had things i wouldnt have given to ds1 thinking "too spicy, i dont like it so he wont either, its weird texture, itll make too much mess, he wont like it" and he, having just turned one, will eat absolutely anything. HTH x

I'm not convinced how you wean makes a difference to how well they eat later. Dd1 loved purees and didn't like blw, wouldnt eat solid food like bread until she was around 2. Dd2 did blw and was fed what we ate. Now dd2 is far fussier than dd1! I can't see any pattern with what my friends have done either. Some children seem willing to try anything and others massively fussy.

@zebrarobot 👍 Thanks!

I don't think it has any impact on eating habits later either. My sister did BLW with hers, she has one good eater and one terrible eater. I did a mixture of all kinds of things--my kid is a decent (though not perfect) eater. Looking at friends, I can't see any particular trend.

My one child who was totally blw has the very best appetite and will eat most things but she was never fussy, even as a baby when I started to mix feed her. The other two were staunch bottle refusers and have been brilliant eaters/fussy eaters and everything in between. Probably depends quite a lot on their personalities.

My kids ate far more spicy stuff aged 6mths to 2yrs than they have eaten since lol!