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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask her to pay more than us

98 replies

inneedofgoodideas · 18/07/2018 13:25

My bf and I are planning on moving into a flatshare with a friend and trying to work out the fairest way to split the rent. We currently live in a houseshare and pay £100 more a month for our room as it is slightly bigger - this rent was decided by landlord.

However, if we move into a 2 bed flat where the bedrooms are the same size, should we split the rent down the middle?

I don't think it is fair for my bf and I to pay 1/3 of the rent each, when we are sharing a room and the friend has a room to themselves. However I realise we take up more room in the kitchen/living room, so am happy to keep paying £100 more (this would be approx almost 10% of total rent if that makes sense). I think this is more than enough (too much?)

what do you think? AIBU to expect to only pay half the rent when I'm only using half the bedrooms?

Obviously if our room ends up being much bigger then i understand we would pay more but most flats we have looked at have equal-sized bedrooms which basically means we are paying more so that the friend can get a cheap, big room.

we will split all bills between 3.

opinions pls!!

OP posts:

Aeroflotgirl · 18/07/2018 14:14

Well it is your choice to move together, she is single and should not be penalised for that by paying more. Why not find a one bedroom flat instead.

easyandy101 · 18/07/2018 14:14

Rent isn't just for the room

Split should not be 50:50 but probably more 60:40 which is what I think you suggested in your op

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 18/07/2018 14:15

Why 1/3 each?

Because 3 people live there?

It's never 1/3 each when it's just normal flatmates if 2 are sharing

No, that would be 50% each between two.

Alexalee · 18/07/2018 14:15

60:40
Or 1/3:2/3
No way 50 50

blackbirdbluebottle · 18/07/2018 14:15

The rent should be split 3 ways, three people in the flat so rent split 3 ways. It's your decision to live with your partner so it shouldn’t be 60/40 as that’s unfair on your friend who will pay more. Split everything in 3 equally

BlueTears · 18/07/2018 14:15

You guys pay 60% she pays 40%
Bills split 3 ways.

Agree with this.

DarlingNikita · 18/07/2018 14:16

What's all this nonsense about the friend needing to 'escape', 'playing gooseberry', claiming that the couple will 'take over the kitchen and TV room all the time', sharing with a couple will end in tears…

DP and I have lived with another person in both flatshares and with the other person as a lodger in our house and it doesn't end in tears and no one takes over or is a gooseberry! We've often cooked and eaten together, watched TV and hung out at home together and gone out as a three. We've all been friends, as are the three people in this OP, not a weird insular couple 'taking over' rooms and obliging the other person to skulk in their bedroom.

Notso · 18/07/2018 14:17

I never knew there were so many people that were so nippy about money until I joined Mumsnet.

I never knew there were so many people that were so snippy about everything however minor until I joined Mumsnet.

missbattenburg · 18/07/2018 14:18

TeenTimesTwo It does . For us, though, we just appreciated having the logic behind it so everyone knew it wasn't just a number plucked from the air.

It also gave a good foundation for changing it if anyone else moved in/out.

BolleauxtoBankers · 18/07/2018 14:19

Split equally three ways for everything.

HollowTalk · 18/07/2018 14:22

It's never 1/3 each when it's just normal flatmates if 2 are sharing

No, that would be 50% each between two

GreenFingers, you're being obtuse. I meant it wouldn't be 1/3 if two flatmates were sharing a room and the other person had their own room.

PopGoesTheWeaz · 18/07/2018 14:23

It's never 1/3 each when it's just normal flatmates if 2 are sharing

I lived with a bunch of people at uni and everyone had their own bedroom except me and my friend (not romantically linked). We had the largest room but still paid less each than the other people did.

If you want to get really formulaic about it, then consider who is using what and what worth the rooms have.

You could say 50% of the flat is private space and 50% communal. You split the 50% of private space in half (as you and BF have half and flat mate has half) and the communal space in thirds (as you each have an equal share of that) and bills in thirds (as you each have an equal share of that.) And do the math and that comes to you and your BF owing about 58%and Flatmate owing about 42%.

Split it 60/40.

whathappenedtomyusername · 18/07/2018 14:24

She's having to share with two people, regardless of whether you're a couple. It should be split three ways.

AjasLipstick · 18/07/2018 14:24

It's your choice to be in a couple/share a room. Not something you have to put up with!

It's not something you get compensated for basically.

PopGoesTheWeaz · 18/07/2018 14:24

Sorry, just realised MissB already covered my equation and much more neatly. So what she said. HOWEVER, if one room is significantly larger, you might adjust the weighting of that percentage. (Maths nerd)

YearOfYouRemember · 18/07/2018 14:24

Dont live with your boyfriend then if you don't want to pay "for half a room and half a wardrobe." .

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 18/07/2018 14:26

TBH i'd split it three ways: the roof over your head covers all three of you as individuals.

PopGoesTheWeaz · 18/07/2018 14:28

It's your choice to be in a couple/share a room. Not something you have to put up with!

It's not something you get compensated for basically.

Yes it is. Or the sharing a room is. Otherwise they would look for a three bedroom and the couple could use 2 bedrooms, one for a bedroom and one for a sex dungeon study.

SarahMused · 18/07/2018 14:32

Fairest way is to use a calculator like this one www.splitwise.com/calculators/rent where you can put in all the different relevant factors and it works out a rent for each person. I would guess 30%/30%/40% will be approximately how it works out. Depending on room sizes and amount of communal space.

Piffle11 · 18/07/2018 14:35

I think you need to split everything 3 ways: bills and rent. I wouldn't want to live with a couple and I think the only incentive would be if everything was split equally between everyone living there.

AjasLipstick · 18/07/2018 14:42

Pop then they'd do that...but they haven't have they? They've chosen to share a room because they like doing that.

There are still two of them. With two people's energy in the house, using up the air and the space in general. Making two people's worth of noise etc.

CoffeeOrSleep · 18/07/2018 14:43

rent - 30/30/40% (you two paying 30% each), all other bills 1/3 each.

BrokenWing · 18/07/2018 14:43

surely the landlord decides on who pays what as all your contracts will be with him? that means if she, or you decide to move out, or if there are any damages you are all covered with your own landlord agreements.

Bizarretortoise · 18/07/2018 14:50

I would say she split it three ways because you are all equally liable if one of you doesn’t pay.
But have you actually asked your friend’s expectations, OP? Because that would be the best way of dealing with this. I’m pretty surprised you didn’t all have this conversation when you were first looking for flats to share and setting a rental budget.

HeebieJeebies456 · 18/07/2018 14:53

i'm essentially paying the same as my friend to have half a room/half the wardrobe space etc

you're choosing to share your room so why should your flatmate pick up the cost of that?

rent should be split equally between the 3 people living there.

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