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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To buy DD a dog for her birthday?

50 replies

MrsHoodwink · 15/07/2018 17:45

When she’s only 6?

She’s never asked for anything particular for birthdays/Xmas and she very politely today asked for a small dog for her birthday in a month or so

Now I’ve already got 2 dogs and I’m totally aware of the costs and care, etc and to be honest... I’m more than happy to get another one, I was definitely considering it anyway

Her DF (my ex) says he thinks it’s a bad idea and my partner doesn’t live with me so although he’s not fond of the idea either, can’t tell me no coz it’s my house

Aibu and spoiling her? Hmm

OP posts:
NWQM · 15/07/2018 17:48

Why do the other two key people in her life think it’s a bad idea? Why does she want her own dog?

user7469322 · 15/07/2018 17:49

No, my parents got me a dog at 4 yrs old and I loved him so much!! Obviously I wasn’t mature enough to feed and walk him at 4 but I looked after him, played with him etc then as I got older then I started feeding and walking him in my own. I had him till I was 15ish and used to take him in my bike to my grandparents so I could go to school! I loved my dog 🐶

WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo · 15/07/2018 17:50

I don't really like the idea of pets as a gift for anyone.

blackbirdbluebottle · 15/07/2018 17:51

You already have 3 dogs why does she need her own dog?

wellBeehivedWoman · 15/07/2018 17:51

If you're happy to take on full caring responsibilities if she doesn't and if you can afford it then why not! Pets are very good for kids, and only a bad present if you don't know or aren't prepared for what you're getting yourself into.

Ummmmgogo · 15/07/2018 17:51

I was all ready to tell you what a terrible idea that is, but actually I see no problem with it. crack on!

user7469322 · 15/07/2018 17:52

@blackbirdbluebottle

Op has 2 dogs already not 3.

BlueGenes · 15/07/2018 17:54

I think it’s absolutely fine. She’ll be so excited Smile

blackbirdbluebottle · 15/07/2018 17:55

Amazing, sorry was watching World Cup while typing, but still OP already has 2 dogs why does the daughter need her own dog?

Elmo230885 · 15/07/2018 17:59

Dogs aren't a gift, they are a commitment. If you want, and will care for another dog then fine but don't call it a birthday present.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 15/07/2018 18:03

I think it’s fine. You are already experienced and committed to two dogs. You are thinking of another anyway. I think you should do it, with the obvious caveat that the care will be falling on you.

user7469322 · 15/07/2018 18:04

@blackbirdbluebottle

If she’s confident the dog will be looked after and loved, then she should get for it. It would definitely give her daughter something to focus on as it will “her” dog.

AnotherOriginalUsername · 15/07/2018 18:06

For me it's a no on the basis that you are already a dog owner, aware of the cost and commitment etc.

However it's a yes YABU on the basis that you think you can find a responsible breeder with a well bred litter, with unreserved puppies in a month. Unless of course you're looking to rescue, which also takes a lot longer than a month.

blackbirdbluebottle · 15/07/2018 18:06

I just feel sorry for the other dogs, they can detect favouritism which the DD will have it just seems a shame, why not get another dog when DD is older and one of the existing ones has died?

RaininSummer · 15/07/2018 18:10

No problem with you adding a dog to your already doggy household but I dont like the idea of dog as birthday present to a small child. I think you need to explain that she can call it her dog but at six, responsibility lies with yiu and she must follow your rules for dog and not ever think.giving dogs to people as gifts is a great idea.

IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere · 15/07/2018 18:10

My son was two when we got our rescue dog (we had two others already from before our son was born) and he immediately decided that the dog was his - even though she was the breed my husband had always dreamt of owning.

Some of his first words were commands for her. He could make her walk to heel off lead (only in places where it was safe), they shared an arm chair and they had a wonderful relationship.

We didn't get the dog for him but he thought we did and it made his day! He would help with feeding, would play with her, and loved her.

I think at the age of 6 your daughter is old enough to be fully involved with caring for a dog and if it is a small one she could even walk it with supervision. If you want another dog then go for it.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 15/07/2018 18:28

Do you want another dog? As it will be you caring for it for the next 14 odd years.

What breed is it?

Branleuse · 15/07/2018 18:31

3 dogs is a massive step up from 2. three dogs is a pack. Ive known loads of people very happy with two, but then got more and its a whole new ballgame, and a small dog is not less work than a big dog. If anything theyre worse because they are so commonly neurotic /fear reactive and yappy, plus vulnerable to attack because of these issues as well as their size.

QueenOfMyWorld · 15/07/2018 18:35

I got chihuhua pup when ds was 2.5 he's now 4.5 and they love each other so much.Go for it

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 15/07/2018 18:37

But the OP's DD already has two dogs Queenofmyworld.

Wolfiefan · 15/07/2018 18:39

At that age kids ask for a unicorn or a moon on a stick! Just because she asked it doesn't mean you should do it.
Extra cost. Time and energy to train. She won't be doing the walking and poo picking etc. how would your dogs feels about a third?

jaseyraex · 15/07/2018 18:40

I'd get her one if you're happy to be doing the bulk of training and caring, which it sounds like you are. I've got six dogs (a mix of big and small) and although it's always hard work introducing a new one, as long as you put in the time and effort for training then you should have no problem.

adaline · 15/07/2018 18:43

You won't find a responsible breeder with puppies ready for new homes in a month, and most rescues won't rehome with such a small child in the house.

However if you want to take on the cost, work and responsibility of a third dog for the next 15 years or so, that's entirely up to you. But please do it responsibly and remember it'll ultimately be your dog and your responsibility. She's six and although she may love the dog, she's far too young to understand what a commitment they are.

SecretNutellaFix · 15/07/2018 18:45

At 6? No. Unless you want another dog, as you will be the one responsible for its welfare for 10 years +

What does she currently do to help care for the 2 dogs already in the house?

HildaZelda · 15/07/2018 18:47

No, not when there are 2 dogs in the house already. At only 6, she's not old enough to be responsible for a dog herself.