To think that people should make an effort to keep noise down in a hospital ward

[Booboostwo]

I am not having the best of time as I am in hospital again with DD so perhaps I am being grumpy, so perfectly happy to be told I am BU.

We are in a small ward, just four beds but as it is a children’s hospital understandably every child has a parent stay with them as well. Patients are at different times in their recovery, some just out of operations, some about to be discharged so understandably some children are livelier than others but am I BU to think that everyone should make more of an effort to be a bit more considerate with noise?

The child in the bed next to us had five adults and two toddlers visiting all afternoon. The toddlers took it in turn to scream, which is what toddlers do, but why keep them in hospital for so long when there are so many adults available to take them home? This child was also discharged by the end of the afternoon so I don’t even understand why so many people needed to visit in hospital

The other bed has a child who is watching TV and playing games on full volume and I mean really, really loud. Why not use earphones or lower the volume of at least the games? The visitors for that bed are having shouting conversations to be heard over the TV. The noise was so loud my DD could not hear me trying to read a book to her sitting right by her bed.

Am I BU to think people should be more considerate of other in a small space where there are some really sick children?

Of course noone wants to be in hospital, that's no reason to behave like a prick though.

And 'free at the point of delivery' is not a reason to expect a lower standard.

Fortunately, I've only been in hospital 4 times, (I'm old, OK!) the maximum stay was two nights following a hysterectomy. Obviously not on a maternity or paediatric ward with crying children (if I was, that kind of noise while maybe annoying is understandable.) I must have been lucky, the last time (the 2 day spell) the others in my bay were quiet....but I was in a post GA and morphine induced haze for most of it!

I did wonder @Booboostwo when you mentioned the new ward.
It's a good hospital but kids recover better with sleep. At our local hospital they are really strict on sleep times and disruptions but I think that because there are often sicker children, out of area children and more complex cases at Sheffield, they are a bit more slack with enforcing visitor numbers and parents using phones etc.

YANBU

Sorry your wee lass in unwell - and all this noise to add to your trouble.

What annoys me in hospital is when the nurses chat very loudly about parties, dates, missed periods and god knows what. Sorry to any wonderful nurses on here - but, trust me, this does go on.

I'm amazed children were allowed on the ward. I live in NI no one under 16 years of age can go on a ward to visit a child in the childrens hospital. This is enforced very strictly. Pretty sure the UHD is the same.
Even if you have your own room.
On another note, I'm a nurse, and hate private rooms. When I worked on a ward that mostly did surgery for cancer patients, the moral was fantastic. The patients were so good for each other, they would come in desperate for a private room and leave swopping numbers.
My dad is 88 and in a private hospital this week, and totally miserable as so lonely and bored.
And a good friend was in a brand new hospital here in NI recently and said the loneliness was dreadful, it's all private rooms. I think a mix, wards with some private rooms for those that need them for whatever reason is much better.

Visiting should be banned except for 2hrs in the afternoon and between 7-8 30 in the evening. Strictly 2 to a bed strictly never at mealtimes or during doctors rounds in the morning.
They get in the bloody way, tire patients out and increase risk of infection. Patients deserve privacy, they can see their relatives all day when they get home.

YANBU. I’ve had more than my fair share of hospital stays with my daughter and the way some people behave utterly beggars belief.
Saying be compassionate you don’t know what they are going through? Well that works both ways!

Unless RaspberryPi1 just happens to be a teacher who also has a paediatric nursing degree and does bank shifts during the school holidays, I imagine her implication that she's a nurse rather than a teacher was an attempt to act as though she knows what she's talking about. She doesn't. And if she is a qualified nurse who does bank shifts, she needs a bit of training. It's not remotely acceptable under usual circumstances for nursing staff to allow an unnecessarily high level of noise during night hours on a children's ward.

I really don't understand the utter indifference the NHS seems to place on decent food,restful sleep and moderate temperatures. They are three things which have a huge impact on health and recovery for relatively little or no cost, but they are completely dismissed by every hospital I've ever seen. My two stays of a week each were hellscapes of excessive and preventable noise, heat, sleep disturbed at least every hour and a decent amount of weightloss through almost inedible food.

It would cost them nothing to enforce basic rules like "all electronic devices must be on low volume or with headphones, no speakerphone phonecalls, and no calls or loud noise after 11pm".

It would cost them nothing to enforce basic rules

It would cost time - potentially quite a bit when dealing with very stroppy, entitled patients and their families. It risks escalating to violence too, sadly. And time can be really short on an understaffed, busy ward.

I totally agree with you how important being able to rest is for recovery, but enforcing rules is actually a lot more difficult than it sounds. Behaviour like this is another symptom of NHS underfunding (among other things).

A single room has become available yay! If someone needs it urgently we’ll be back in the ward but if we’re lucky we’ll sleep here tonight.

My son has reasonably low level, but very regular hospital stays and appointments. The way people carry on is unreal, they don’t seem to understand that they’re not in a bloody private room! Constant visitors in and out, stinking food, playing games and watching videos with no headphones, talking on speaker. Who the actual fuck needs to have a long conversation about absolutely nothing, on speakerphone at 11-12pm??? You’re trying to comfort your child while someone is talking absolute crap on the phone at full volume “yeah I know... I saw a dress in Next I might get.... so and so next door said bla bla bla...”. The worst I can remember was being at GOSH, and the poor mite in the next bed was so so poorly but had constant adult visitors talking loudly and rapidly and their home language, so I have no idea what they were talking about but it was relentless. One night it was getting so late and my son was tossing and turning trying to sleep with ear buds in. The little girl they were visiting was weeping and whimpering from exhaustion and they were all chatting in her bay with the light on, eating and blabbing on and on. I felt like asking in what world did they think they were doing what’s right by that child (and the others on the ward)? Yes you’ve taken the time to visit and shown your face, but for what actual purpose? People are disgustingly selfish. At the airport the other day someone was sitting at the boarding gate watching some shit on YouTube on full blast to the left of me, and someone on the right was watching their dick mates doing Instagram stories. I told both of them they were being inconsiderate pigs, and they looked around and rolled their eyes as if ‘can you believe this moany cow?’ but thankfully did turn them off. What is wrong with people!

Oh booboos I could cry with happiness for you, a private room will feel like the Ritz after suffering everyone and their random uncle’s inconsiderate crap.

Fingers crossed you get that room Boob!

I've only come across one arsehole on the wards with DC, I had a section and needed a high back chair as I was pumping for DC's tube feeds and the only space they had for this chair was against the window so we were placed there (it was a free space) so while I was trying to put my hands free bra on under my top and situate the double pump I had the curtain round for privacy but the father in the next section decided he wanted sunlight so he rudely yanked back the curtain all the way so I was half exposed and then continued to moan and complain when a paediatric nurse came to my rescue and closed them up with a louder than normal,
"let's give you a bit of privacy mummy, if you have any more problems just press that button."

People are selfish and entitled, they only kick up a stink when it affects their own wants, it seems to get worse as each year passes.

I have in the past wondered if 'allowing' noise and inconsiderate behaviour by patients and their visitors is semi-deliberate on the part of the hospital - so as to encourage patients to leave asap and free up beds. When I was pregnant with DS2 I was admitted to hospital with high BP - I then didn't sleep at all for three days due to constant noise from people watching the hospital TVs (one installed for each bed, as if no one had given any thought to the amount of noise this would produce) and loads of noise from the nurses at night. I was furious that I had to face labour having had no proper rest. Then, after DS2 was born I was put on a ward where the woman in the bed opposite had loads of loud relatives constantly around her bedside, none of whom did anything about the two children with them who were allowed to run around the ward. They actually bumped into the cot where new DS2 was sleeping. I told a nurse and she did tell the people that their children had to stop running around. But as there was in theory a rule about only two visitors at once, I can't understand why no one attempted to enforce this. As a result of my extreme tiredness I was barely able to look after DS2 and couldn't wait to leave. Two days later, however, we were back in the children's ward as DS2 was not feeding properly. I do wonder if my fatigue may have contributed to a slow milk supply. Decades ago my mum spent a whole week resting in hospital after a perfectly normal delivery, and it was expected then that mothers needed rest. She didn't even have to look after the baby as nurses just brought them onto the ward for feeding.

niketrainers totally agree with you re visiting hours, with the exception of one parent/carer per child or vulnerable adult. Opening visiting has a lot to answer for.
It really comes down to selfishness and a lack of consideration for others though. For some reason many people nowadays seem to think they can do whatever the fuck they want and rules and regulations don't apply to them.

Years ago thpugh ward sisters would police visiting time and make visitors leave the ward at mwaltimes and for a quiet hour after.
If you are sat in bed chatting to 5 people round you youre well enough to go to the day room imo.

one time my mum was in, there was someone who had about 15 visitors all the time - I wish I was joking, they brought chairs from everywhere and even tried to pinch fruit that was meant for patients.

The first thing that confuses me about that number of visitors is infection risk.

We are cursed...we just had to move again! The building is brand new but has loads of problems. The lights in various rooms keep coming on all by themselves, the windows open in the middle of the night and won’t close, the climate control is not operational yet and now the lights in our room wouldn’t switch off.

We’re up again at 11:30 for pain killers and obs, then infusion at midnight so I might as well give up on sleep.

Judging from my last few visits to see relatives in Kettering General, most wards have local radio blaring away in the background. Totally unprofessional as well as downright stressful for vulnerable, sick patients. Staff just seem to tune it out. You’re treated as a selfish killjoy if you complain. Never come across it in any other hospital.

I used to be a nurse - I trained in the ‘80s - and I remember being taught that sleep was an important part of recovery for our patients. Yes, sometimes things have to happen during the night - admissions, treatments, bedpans etc - and some noise is unavoidable, but we learned to minimise it as much as possible - and to avoid unnecessary noise.

I did nights on old fashioned Nightingale wards - one medical, one surgical, as part of my training, and we managed to keep the ward quiet enough for our patients to sleep through the night most of the time.

They were more authoritarian days - much more restrictive visiting hours, for example, and people would have been much less likely to argue with Sister or Staff Nurse if they were asked to be quieter. In many ways, things are better now, but in some, we have gone too far in the other direction - people know everything about their RIGHTS, and nothing about their responsibilities or about consideration for others.

Once I was in a ward with a family chanting until midnight. I eventually said to the nurse I respect whatever they are trying to do, but they are not respecting other patients and all our visitors left 3 hours ago. Words were said and they left. I hope things improve for you x