DH and hobby in late pregnancy

[matchmakers]

I don't know if I am BU or if my DH is being a selfish arse.

I am 34 weeks pregnant but measuring 4 weeks ahead so bloody huge. I've got SPD, and am generally starting to feel really rotten and exhausted. I'm a SAHM to a 2.5 year old who really never stops except (luckily!) for a pretty regular hour nap at lunchtime.

By late afternoon I'm really struggling. I'm trying to make sure I always rest when she naps (either I nap or at least I sit down and relax), I'm snacking regularly to stop blood sugar dips. Nothing wrong with iron etc, it's just late pregnancy fatigue. I sleep terribly, especially with the recent heat. I was the same last time, all normal. I'm lucky in the fact that both grandmothers are retired and often spend time with me and DS in the week, giving me an hour or two to put my feet up while they play with him or nip him out to the local park.

DH works full time, Monday - Friday. He's out of the house from 7am-7pm. He gets home each night in time to read DS a story and put him into bed but that's it. DS is excellent for bed, he almost takes himself really so no difficulties with this. I do 95% of the housework in a reasonably sized 4 bed house as well as the cooking etc as he's out but he does help out at weekends, when he's here.

DH has announced this week that his football season is restarting early or they've got lots of friendlies coming up and basically that means he'll be out one evening a week for training (no issue with this at all, DS will be in bed anyway) and from 11am on Saturdays until about 6pm. So pretty much another day I need to have DS on my own when he could be here helping me out. His answer when I said I could really do with a hand here at the weekends at this stage was 'ask my mum to come and help' which she would but I don't want to do because she already comes in the week and I don't want to take the piss.

He has already told the team he's taking 3 weekends off when baby comes because I'm having a ELCS, but he thinks this is enough. AIBU in saying to him that I really need him here at his stage, and that actually as the games he's potentially missing aren't even league games it shouldn't really matter? He keeps up his fitness with training and going running in the evenings anyway.

Doesn't help that DS is starting to get to the stage where he's upset with DH goes, as he gets exciting when he's here at weekends! So not only do I have him on my own when DH could be helping, I have a grumpy, cross DS who is whinging for his Dad.

I'm not trying to be a precious snowflake, I'm very much a 'just get on with it' person but I'm really starting to find things tough. He just can't see why he should give up his 'me time' when he works hard all week. He does work hard, no disputing that. My point is he is 36 years old and at some point in life surely being needed at home has to come first.

Sorry that was longer than I wanted, I didn't want to drip feed. So. AIBU?

I'd say resign as captain and only do some matches 1-5. You mustn't be in agony by the end of the day and yknow you might want to spend time with your husband sometimes.

he's now an ex!

This is a point - if your DH becomes an ex then he'll only be playing football every other Saturday, won't he....?

He's being a dick.
I wish it was easy to get hold of those fake pregnant suits so every dad to be could spend a week wearing it night & day to get a tiny example of what their partners are going through.
Definitely get your HV to have a word, but also tell him that you are HUGELY disappointed that he isn't going to spend these precious last few weekends spending one-on-one time with his child. He's rarely going to have that chance again for years to come, why is kicking a ball around more important than being a proper parent??
If you struggle to say this to him then write it in a letter and ask him to respond in writing, make him verbalize why football is more important than his child and his pregnant wife; maybe if he does that he'll realise what a selfish prick he's being.