AIBU to feel a little disappointed?

[Mixedupmumma83]

Early stages of a new relationship. At the beginning DP declared he was coming off Some social media platforms. He had a lot of female followers and followed a lot of females who often post led naked photos... the usual boy stuff. He came off because he felt it was a bit disrespectful to me and I appreciated his position and explained I wouldn’t really feel comfortable with him scrolling through social media in mine and dds company with the types of things that were on there. Also I have been cheated on a lot in the past and unfortunately I can be quite insecure.

Fast forward and now he’s back on, new account posting gym pics and lapping up the female attention and following the likes of things he used to. Don’t get me wrong I get it, it’s a boy thing.
I’m just a bit disappointed after discussing it previously and him saying he wouldn’t like it if it were the other way around why he’s gone back to doing it? If he told me it made him uncomfortable I would respect that!

Please tell me I’m being ridiculous and the problem is my own and I’m just being insecure. I’ve had Facebook messages from fake accounts from people telling me he’s a player etc so that isn’t helping matters!!

Sorry. Only speaking for myself, I couldn't be doing with that.

Looking at pics of naked females he knows? That's not a boy thing, that's a creep thing.

Nothing wrong with having female friends but not following them purely for this reason.

There's no such thing as "a boy thing". Either a man is a twat or he isn't. Don't make excuses for him based on the fact he has a penis. Be more concerned about him behaving like a penis.

Nah, that’s not a boy thing. He sounds like hard work.

Also, I'm probably overstepping the mark but am feeling ballsy so will run with it. Don't introduce a new relationship to your DD. Small children don't need people coming and going from their lives, they need constancy and protection.

He doesn’t know these people to confirm.... not that that makes it better.

We’ve been together 6 months or so. My dd has met him as I have her 99% of the time. I didn’t have any reservations about her meeting him and we sat down with my dds dad etc first. We all get on well so I have no concerns there. Granted people may not agree with that, but we all did what was right for us at the time. I’m not into rushing people into my daughters life.

Its not a boy thing- unless he under 16-he is not a boy.

He is a man. Men don't do this- please don't nomalise this by trivialising it.

“It’s a boy thing”

No it isnt

.. the usual boy stuff

Don’t get me wrong I get it, it’s a boy thing

followed a lot of females who often post led naked photos

How come your standards are so low? You make him sound like a horny teenager.

He sounds a bit pathetic to be honest.

I'm sure you could do better. At the very least by finding someone who will respect your wishes.

What does "led naked photos" mean?

Presumably he's an adult, not a boy!

Is he following people because they post naked photos, or is he following people who happen to do so?

I think that might have an impact on how unreasonable you're being.

Yeah, no. Following people who post nudes regularly isn't something I've encountered in guys outside the teen years. Seems a little fucked up.

Please don't convince yourself of this 'boy thing' bollocks, where on earth do you get this idea from? Of course it's not. It's out of order and he'd be single immediately if he was my DP.

I don't know any men that follow naked women online. Cars stuff, comedians, football etc. Naked women? That's a perve thing.

Sounds a bit creepy... How long have you known him?

I don’t think it bodes well that he’s folded so soon after giving something up “out of respect” for you. So his respect lasted what, weeks?

The usual boy stuff? Well yes, if he's 15 and a bit daft, maybe.

I feel really old if that is considered normal now.

You can do better than this one.

How old is he? My husband had page 3 girl posters in his bedroom as a child/teen, THAT’S a boy thing. Needing an ego boost in the form of likes on social media is very childish, drooling over other women is disrespectful to you! I would not be impressed!

How can you be sexually attracted to such a prat?

Whoops typing error flatpackJackie.
You have all confirmed my gut feeling really. I guess my standards are low after spending years in awful relationships. My ex constantly told me no one else would want me and put me down, cheated on me etc.

I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t being over sensitive. To confirm the accounts being “followed” consist only of these types of pictures!

I know my answer! Thank you all :)

I would take the messages from fake profiles in your inbox seriously as well. He'd probably argue that it's some bitter ex out to destroy his life, but I don't think the world is as full of bitter exes as some men will make out. Someone has taken the time to write to you and warn you about his character. I wouldn't be able to ignore that.

It's not "a boy thing".

It's a misogynistic test thing. Big difference.

Don't put up with this shit OP.