AIBU to feel a little disappointed?

[Mixedupmumma83]

Early stages of a new relationship. At the beginning DP declared he was coming off Some social media platforms. He had a lot of female followers and followed a lot of females who often post led naked photos... the usual boy stuff. He came off because he felt it was a bit disrespectful to me and I appreciated his position and explained I wouldn’t really feel comfortable with him scrolling through social media in mine and dds company with the types of things that were on there. Also I have been cheated on a lot in the past and unfortunately I can be quite insecure.

Fast forward and now he’s back on, new account posting gym pics and lapping up the female attention and following the likes of things he used to. Don’t get me wrong I get it, it’s a boy thing.
I’m just a bit disappointed after discussing it previously and him saying he wouldn’t like it if it were the other way around why he’s gone back to doing it? If he told me it made him uncomfortable I would respect that!

Please tell me I’m being ridiculous and the problem is my own and I’m just being insecure. I’ve had Facebook messages from fake accounts from people telling me he’s a player etc so that isn’t helping matters!!

Sorry to hear you've had such shit relationships. It's so hard to build your self-esteem up when someone has chipped away at it so it's easy to end up in a vicious cycle of destructive relationships. It sounds like you have some clarity with regards to what you need to do with this particular one. Good luck.

the usual boy stuff
a boy thing

He's not a boy. Stop making excuses for him. It's a twat thing.

Ditch him, OP. You don't need him in your life or your DD's life.

I get that it is that boy's thing, and he obviously knows that it is disrespectful or he wouldn't have initially stopped. It really isn't universally and for every boy a thing. It just isn't

It's so hard to build your self-esteem up

I'm not saying its easy, to build self esteem, but it is quite simple. For example, considering what he is doing, viewing and posting these pictures will not build your self esteem, while drawing a line and saying no to this would, i honestly think, build your self esteem. You would be being kind and gracious to yourself, showing yourself how you deserve to be treated.

Hey OP. Glad we have confirmed your gut feeling. As a pp said, these men have chop chop chipped away at your self esteem, leaving you thinking that anyone is better than noone.

That's just not true at all.

Work on building your confidence. You are so worth it. And once you've got your confidence back, you will see just how much choice you really have.

And what a wonderful role model you will be to your dd. You don't want her growing up thinking shitty men are the norm.

Good luck OP

Nah, I could have no respect for someone who does that.

How old is this prince? If he’s older than in about year 10 I would say this is far from usual and fuck him right off. Bellend.

Is it just Gym type pics and similar shots form the Women? That I could understand.

However, I think that you possibly want a very different relationship than he does and I don't think that he is the ideal person for you to even date.

As said, work on your securities first.

Thank you all for your lovely messages. This is just the nail in the coffin I think really, there are other things I’m not happy with.

I mentioned it to him and basically the response was that he’s only human and appreciates a “sexy woman” and isn’t interested in anything more than looking. He posts mainly topless gym progress photos because he says the likes etc give him a confidence boost which I don’t doubt.

I’m sure he would feel the same if I were posting pictures of myself semi naked or in bikinis on social media for attention that he’d absolutely love it... even more so if that was accompanied by following many accounts for men that posted provocative pictures!?

He’s sulking with now anyway because he can’t cope with my “strop”

In the kindest way...'it's Just a boy thing' is one step away from the excuse of 'boys will be boys' which gets trotted out to excuse some truly horrendous behaviour at times. Please hold him to account as the adult he is.

Also don't put up with his attempts to diminish your feelings by writing them off as a 'strop'! He knows damn well how you feel and probably enjoyed the feeling of kudos he got initially from being sooo noble () by deleting those accounts in the first place but now that's worn off it's back to his old ways.