I reported someone today for child abuse.

[Pipeup]

Name changed as this is outing.

I watched a mother slam her young child to the floor and throw a bottle at him amongst other things.

I couldn't do much to intervene as I had my own child with me plus a friend of mine and her children. We both saw the full incident and I called the police straight away to report.

What I dont get though is why people are trying to make excuses for this kind of abuse.

I had a message off someone who knows the woman in question saying that her children are a right handful but surely there's a difference between discipline and violence.

Someone else came forward and said that she saw the same woman grab her child by the harm so forcefully she was actually worried it could of broke his arm.

So mumsnet did I do the right thing? If you. saw this happening would you report or turn a blind eye?

I've never reported anyone in my whole life for anything but seeing a child that frightened and distressed really shocked and upset me and the people I was with. I will admit I didn't see what happened in the minutes leading up to whay happened it was the the first push that caught my eye she sent him anout 5 meters across the grass it was that forceful then threw the bottle as he walked back towards her crying she then grabbed him by both arms swung him and threw him to the ground.

Aside from reporting what else could I of done differently in that situation especially when I had children with me myself. A lot of people are saying i should of hit her! I'm not violent at all and what sort of example is that for children anyway?

It makes me wonder how much of this violence goes on behind closed doors, and the effect it has on the poor children been abused.
We live in a society where men are always portrayed as the abusers, sexual, physical or mental, but not women.
This is because women have more control over the media outlets where this topic is discussed, women's magazines, women's sections in newspapers, woman's hour on the radio, minister for women, and as this is feminist dominated it is not good copy to discuss violent women, it is covered up.

There is no question you did the right thing. Absolutely horrendous. Poor child.

If you think of it not as reporting the mother's behaviour but sending out a distress flare on behalf of the child it's a no-brainer.

It's about asking for help not grassing someone up - the mother needs help too. I'm sure she loves her kid but something has gone wrong.

Well done for stepping in.

Oh - just saw you put it on Facebook.

As a rule I don't think you should post this stuff on Facebook, partly because anyone can say anything about anyone else and partly because the kid deserves privacy. But it sounds like the end justified the means in this case.

You absolutely did the right thing! What a nasty bitch. Poor child.

if she is doing that in public , what is going on at home.

Absolutely the right thing. I would have done the same.

And my twins can be a “right handful” - worst that happens in public is that I shout “no” a lot while chasing them around. Never in a million years would I hurt them, and if I accidentally knocked / pushed them over while trying to wrangle them both there’d be cuddles immediately. Multiple incidents like that in short succession is a big worry.

I think you know full well you did the right thing I'd be more worried about you if you hadn't reported it. But you must be shaken up by it all I know I would be.

Justilou1

Pipeup. You did something very good and brave. Thank you.

Cherrysherbert

As I already said I didn't really want to have to post at first I thought I knew who the woman was but when I looked closer I really wasn't sure good Job I checked as it turned out to be someone completely different the police were happy with the post and agreed its impossible to to investigate these things without a name I only snapped a photo and posted it as the woman was leaving the park straight after the incident if I could of called the police there and then before she left I would of done that as I say as soon as the police had all the information they needed I removed the post. I just really hope that little boy is ok.

I know you say you did not see the lead up to it, but I cannot think of anything a child could have done to justify the actions you describe, not even the worst behaved child!

Yes you did the right thing. That is awful and if that is what she does in public then what on earth might she do when no one is watching her!

Hopefully social services will intervene and help the poor child.

Yes we will be friends on Facebook! Hello whoever you are. I can't even begin to tell you how totally awful yesterday was I've witnessed some things but that level of violence towards a child was well beyond my limits. I've had a couple to messages today from others who saw the post yesterday and were in the same park all saying that saw the same thing but as far as I'm aware I'm the only person who bothered to report it and that disgusts. I do in some ways wish I handled differently and not posted on Facebook my phone has been none stop by people messaging either saying they saw it too or they know the woman and telling me about other incidents I really dont want to hear all this stuff I think their telling the wrong person! I probably also have a lot of people from a certian part of our town after me right now for reporting it. Can't win!

Well done OP, you did the right thing. If she treats her child like that in public imagine what she treats them like behind closed doors?

You absolutely did the right thing. You helped that little child and that is all that matters...nothing else.

Just reading this makes me feel upset, you absolutely did the right thing.

OP, you absolutely did all the right things. I would also pass ALL messages you receive in relation to this to the police. It is up to them to call witnesses etc. Even more so if you are threatened.

Well done, you've probably saved a little life there

If this world had more people like you in it op then we would be a damn sight better off and so would so many vulnerable children. You did good and don't let anyone tell you any different.

That was a really brave action on your part
Really hope that you don't get any 'aggro' as a result

We need more people like you to stand up for these poor children! Well done op.

You were really brave. You done the right thing

I’m not saying I don’t regret life choices but I learn to live with mine.

The Only thing I have ever regretted in my life was the 2 times I was a bystander to something and didn’t intervene.

One was when I was very young and didn’t know what to do. To this day I think about the toddler in that buggy at night being shouted at.

You did the right think OP

Absolutely you did the right thing, and I hope the woman is prosecuted.

It’s quite possible that this child is already known to Children’s Services or that red flags have been raised in the past. Your information may be the thing that ensures that action is taken or that a parent gets help. You did the right thing, and what more people should realise is that child protection is everyone’s responsibility. I say this as a social worker admittedly, but also as a mum with a child with ADHD who was often at her wits’ end.

THANK YOU